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dd2 just told me she doesnt play with anyone at school

(10 Posts)
misdee Sun 07-Sep-08 20:35:13


she is not a girly girl at all.

dd1 confirmed what dd2 said and said that dd2 was 'lonely'

i just want to sob for her.

TheNaughtiestGirlIsaMonitor Sun 07-Sep-08 20:49:56

What year is she in?

My dc1 says she has no best friend, and that she will 'talk to anybody'. Not sure if that is indpendent and carefree, or if it is aloof and cautious.

Can you ask the teacher to try and encourage a few possible friendships?

misdee Sun 07-Sep-08 20:52:14

just gone into yr 1.

she says she 'broke up with her boyfriend last week' i have told her she is too young to worry about boys and to go and play with the other children.

Leslaki Sun 07-Sep-08 20:56:34

I work in yr 1 and y=have a y2 ds and y1 dd - basically a lot of wht they tell you isn't actually true! My 2 regularly tell me they played with no-one, sat on their own etc or did nothing all day even though I work in the same school and can clearly see that is not the case. Speak to the teacher about it and get her to keep an eye on your dd - if she is talking about boyfriends she is probably OK - thewy all go on about boyfriends/girlfriends all the time! Ds was told off in reception for kissing his gf in class!!! blush If she has a 'BF' she is prob mixing well but they all ahve moments of being alone in playground as they all rush around so much and go on to various groups of friends constantly. Why not invite some friend round to tea on a 12 1 basis?

TheNaughtiestGirlIsaMonitor Sun 07-Sep-08 20:58:25

My dd is in the same year. I don't think all the girls in her class have definite best friends, not yet anyway. So there's definitely time to encourage friendships.

Or maybe, that loads on pressure. Just opportunities to be friendly if you know what I mean.

divedaisy Sun 07-Sep-08 22:02:51

Hi my ds started in a new school for Y2. He's been to school for a week and will tell me that noone plays with him - they all run away from me. He also commented that even his coat 'peg is on its own' - god I wish I could do it for him.
However, he is slowly coming home with names every day...
the teacher is making sure he's playing with other kids...
he also goes to ju jitsu and is mixing well with new friends there, and on wed he starts Beavers.
it takes time, and as a parent it can be the hardest thing to watch. so long as your child goes to school happy and without tears, relax, don't make it a huge issue.

I'm as bad! I stand inthe school playground as the 'new parent' and I find it hard to speak to other parents who already know each other from their kids being in Y1 together!
Tomorrow I WILL speak to one new person....

Littlefish Sun 07-Sep-08 22:12:20

Misdee - I don't know your dd, obviously, but do you think you could find out whether it is because she is trying to dictate what games are played? This is a fairly common thing at year 1 and Reception. Children often want to be the ones to suggest the games to be played, and if others don't want to play, they choose to go off on their own. This then translates as "I haven't got anyone to play with".

Littlefish Sun 07-Sep-08 22:13:53

Alternatively, does she need some help to learn how to ask to join in someone else's game? Some children lack the confidence to approach a group in the playground and you might need to do some practising at home.

julesrose Mon 08-Sep-08 11:22:49

My DD has just joined a new school Yr 1. It's really hard especially as she ws sooo happy in her last school and had a great bunch of friends. She now looks really nervous and is very timid at approaching other children. What can I say to her that will help?

doiwant3 Mon 08-Sep-08 14:36:41

I think maybe you should just tell her that she should ask if she could play with the children she likes - and then maybe you could arrange a few early playdates, so she can meet those children out of school?

With regards to not having a best friend, my dd is in year 2 and doesn't have one. She is very self-sufficient and, although she likes playing with the other children, she doesn't often ask for playdates etc, and sometimes I do worry.

Then again, I am quite shy myself. I was pleased to see this today, as I did think it was just me! Maybe we all need to be a bit less shy etc, us and our kids.

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