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Moving schools in year and making friends(12 Posts)
We are increasingly growing out of our zone 2 flat and can't afford a house anywhere nearby. DC would be in year 2 and 4 by the time we move which may be out of London but certainly further out in London. Does anyone have positive stories of kids making friends after school moves or will I be dooming them to friendless-ness?!
Both kids are shy but popular but there is talk in both years of some of their friends moving in the next year or so too for similar reasons...
I don't have any experience in this but studied child psychology and it's good for their development. As adults we have to meet different types of people, make new friends and move around the place all the time so learning this as a child, alleviates anxiety for the future. And after all, we're raising stable adults not children good luck!
Aww @K1999 that's a good way of looking at it. Life is about transitions and you're right about raising stable adults and preparing them for adulthood. If we move out of London it would be to one of our hometowns so we have friends with kids their age just not necessarily at the schools they will be at.
Hopefully the school does a buddy system - ask them about it. One of my dd's best friends is one her nice little gang got asked to buddy up with when the new girl moved in late last year.
DS moves schools after Christmas in year 3. It was fine, absolutely fine. He’s made a lovely group of friends.
Thanks @MrsIronfoundersson they did that for a new girl in DD's class in yr 2 and they were falling over themselves to be the new girls buddy. Tje new girl has good friends at school but I note apart from us she doesn't get invited to parties so feel while kids are accommodating of new kids sometimes parents have set ideas of who their kids friends are. This is a year after starting. DD lives for play dates and parties so I do worry about friendships outside of the school day.
Good outcome for your DS @CoronoaIsComing. Glad he settled in.
Totally fine. That’s with our reasonably cautious DS, he moved nurseries twice, changed pre school and then P1 in new area all because of job relocation, we may have another move on the cards for P3. Every time he easily makes a new set of friends as they play so much, though I’d be less happy about him settling so well if moving further up the school/at secondary level. Honestly don’t worry OP, but allow for a bit of time to get used to any new school ‘rules’ and systems more than friends, which will be the easiest bit.
We have moved with a reception child, a reception and Yr2, and a Yr2 and Yr4. They have made good friends after every move and get invited to parties. It may take a bit to get a 'best' friend, but my experience is they are quickly involved in a group.
Your bigger challenge could be getting them both into the same school- this can be easier if they are both in Junior years instead of infant years (although after our most recent move our younger DD had a school place 2nd week in September, elder DD got in on appeal just before the October holiday).
Thanks @Timefor45 that's reassuring.
Yes, @Aroundtheworldin80moves getting school places is another worry especially if we stay in London...
My yr3 dd is in her 3rd school, yr 1 ds is in his 2nd. They're fine, they love the move and the adventure and make new friends easily, even though dd is chronically shy. We keep them informed of plans, show pictures and talk about new areas before we go. Dh is military so we don't get much choice but it has been commented on regularly how mature, confident and happy the dc are. They pick up a lot from you, if you have anxiety about moving them they'll reflect that. Dd still has friends she writes to and talks to from her first 2 schools. They'll both probably continue to move schools every couple of years by til high school when we have a few plans for keeping them a bit more settled.
My DC are in years 1 and 3 and haven't moved themselves but have welcomes lots of new kids into their classes. Their school is small and friendly which helps but it usually takes about a week or two for the new child to be completely immersed in the class.
We moved (country) part way through YR and Y2. Youngest doesn't remember the first school. Y2 has kept in touch with a handful of the kids from his year.
We moved back to the UK part way through Y3 and Y5. Oldest is a sociable thing, and hasnt looked back. Youngest is pretty reserved, but has settled. Both boys were initially very popular, as the "exotic" new kids, but found their own friends within the first month. Youngest has said he never wants to move school again.
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