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I'm about to lose my ds to school and don't want him to go - anyone got any good advise

(24 Posts)
shinyhappytonks Thu 16-Aug-07 08:57:51

I can't believe it is almost that time

My baby will be starting afternoons for a week, then mornings until October and then start integrating full-time 'till xmas.

I am soooooo going to miss him that i start to get weepy at night when i think about it. My dh says that this is good as he is growing up, but all i can worry about is what will happen if/when he says 'i want my mummy'

The school is lovely and he is looking forward to going and i might even get to go to the toilet on my own but how do i come to terms with the change that is just about to be wrought on our lives !

My ds will be 4 and 5mnths, so not that young - but still comes for a hug when he gets his clothes in a twist.

Anyone else dreading this ? or am i just a sad over-controlling self-centered mother ? He is an only child btw.


nutcracker Thu 16-Aug-07 08:59:33

Me me me me, ds is my baby, youngest of 3 and I want him to stay at home forever with me.

I am absolutly dreading his first day.

FioFio Thu 16-Aug-07 09:00:20

Message withdrawn

ghosty Thu 16-Aug-07 09:01:12

Sweetie, you are not 'losing him to school' ... honestly ...
Yes, he may be a bit young (in NZ where my DS started school they start a bit later) but if it is a nice school and all that it will only enrich his life ...

If it really upsets you this much though why not home educate?

nailpolish Thu 16-Aug-07 09:02:05

my dd2 trotted off to nursery today with her daddy and i howled on the doorstep

all i cna think of too is what if she needs a cuddle?


expatinscotland Thu 16-Aug-07 09:05:28

That's DD1 away for her first day back at nursery.

She was all excited.

I cried as I ironed her wee top last night and even put some iron-on applique flowers onto it to tart it up.

All she could talk about was how she was going to get to play with the other 'childrens' and see Ross, some kid who follows her round and says, 'She's my girlfriend.'


Gobbledigook Thu 16-Aug-07 09:18:50

God no, I can't wait!

potoftea Thu 16-Aug-07 09:33:21

It is tough because it is like your dc is now in the system. No matter how much they like the school and you know it's good for them, you have lost something and it is sad.

You will unfortunatly get to feel sad all over again as he moves on through his life. I cried when mine all had their graduations from primary school, I've shed tears when they have left different clubs that they'd worked up through (like beavers, cubs, and then scouts), and no doubt I'll be bawling when they leave school for good.

No advice for you I'm afraid, you already know the positive stuff, but you are mourning the lovely times you have had with him which are now over.
Bring plenty of tissues on the first day, for you, not him.

MaloryTowersHasManners Thu 16-Aug-07 09:35:47

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

hotcrossbunny Thu 16-Aug-07 09:36:44

Me too! I feel exactly like this. Dd is an only too - there will be a very big dd sized hole here during the day

expatinscotland Thu 16-Aug-07 09:36:55

My niece became a teenager yesterday.

My sister sobbed!

I can't believe it. I remember rushing to the hospital after my mum phoned to tell me my sister was in labour.

Has it really been 13 years?!

PellMell Thu 16-Aug-07 09:43:30

Aww bless you.
I was reading this and nodding because I know I will feel like this too.

DD2 has just finished watching Mr Tumble (oh the joys of cbeebies) and said
"I love you Mummy"
I said "oh thats lovely darling, I love you too"
She then said "can I have a sweety Mummy?"

I feel used

expatinscotland Thu 16-Aug-07 09:45:55

Aw, Pell!

DD1 will sometimes kiss my hand as we're walking along the street and she is holding my hand.

She will be taller than I am soon enough, so I cherish every time I can kiss her head whilst it's still below mine!

shinyhappytonks Thu 16-Aug-07 09:54:46

Thank you for all your lovely replies.

I know that it will turn out okay, as i was like this last year when he started nursery and all turned out to be wonderful. But i think i must be driving my dh nuts

Its a strange feeling though, 'cos i know that he needs to be with other children (mummy doesn't play enough for his liking !) and he needs the stimulation, BUT i dread how quiet the house will be without him chattering and making a racket. Hell, if he goes to bed early my dh and i are at a bit of a loss Maybe i need to get out more

Thanks again, i will pop back in later but as the sun is out and the rain has gone we are off to the park !

mummytoamonkey Thu 16-Aug-07 22:36:21

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Reallytired Sun 19-Aug-07 15:07:45

Starting school is like finishing one chapter of your life and starting a new one. Tears at the passing of the pre school years is normal.

However I think that you will find that school is a positive adventure. My son has loved his reception year and learnt loads both socially and academically.

AlwaysTheMummy Sun 19-Aug-07 22:16:13

I totally agree with you Shiny, my son, my first is about to go into reception and he only has 3 days of settling in so on the fourth day of school he's there full time, I have no worries about him going to school as he's a very sociable boy and loves to play with his friends, I'm worried about how I'll cope, it's just been the 2 of us for the past 4 years, hubby works long days, so for ds to be at school nearly all day and me at home I'll be very bored, I'm so used to having him around and we have so much fun together.

He's at such a loving age and I don't want him to grow up just yet, lol, I work from 1pm - 10pm on a saturday so he's in bed when I get home and he always wakes me up on Sunday morning with 'I missed you all day mummy, I love you and missed you' then he climbs into bed and we have a little cuddle for 10 minutes.

Our second child is due on boxing day so I've only got a few months of being alone by myself during the day but I guess I'll just miss having my special little guy around. xx

KerryMumbledore Sun 19-Aug-07 22:17:10

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

deegward Sun 19-Aug-07 22:19:02

ds2 starts reception in September, full time from day one , thought i would have the flags out, but the thought of my baby going is filling me with dread already. Ds1 starts in juniors the same day so both boys really growing up,.....going into corner to cry

lulabelle Fri 24-Aug-07 16:20:24

You know shiny, you could have been me this time last year, DS started reception and it broke my heart, I was a wreck all over the summer. Everyone told me there was nothing to worry about but I was having none of it, all I could see was a little boy who looked too small for school and his sad eyes whenever it was mentioned. DS was quiet and I was convinced he wouldn't like it and I would have tears everyday. However, a year on, my quiet little DS is now 5 going on 15 (not sure if thats a good thing grin) he is the life and soul of the class - the total opposite of last sept! He has made lots of friends and he has drove me mad this summer because he can't get back quick enough! I would never ever have believed it. Its funny how quickly they grow up that first year, I've made myself cry now sad smile

twocutedarlings Sat 25-Aug-07 22:52:43

My DD1 Starts school on the 4th which will be her 5th birthday im devastated that i wont be spending the whole day with her, she dose just the morning on her first day, but atfer that its straight into full days. I will miss her so much as she is really good company !!

However DD2 starts nursery after xmas and i cannot wait, lol

startouchedtrinity Sat 25-Aug-07 23:00:38

My dd1 started reception last year and I cried all day. Not made easier my dd2 howling for her too. It took me probably til Easter before I was really happy with things. However, dd1 was happy as larry from day one of course.

You are his mummy and no-one will replace you. I think in a way I was worried dd1 would hero-worship her v. pretty young teacher but it didn't happen. And it is surprising how you make the most of the time you get together. I am dreading dd1 going back and will cry buckets, but she loves it and will be fine.

Dd1 told me I will cry so much I won't know what to do when baby ds starts, but I will so be over it by then! (I've already finished with toddler groups, poor little chap..grin)

hotpotmama Sat 01-Sep-07 20:44:17

I know how you feel. My DS1 is starting in reception on monday. He is very excited as he knows half his classmates already from playschool which definitely makes it easier for him.

I am going to really miss him but I will have DS2 to keep me occupied still. Think he will miss him loads too as they are great mates.

Just keep yourself busy for the first few weeks and am sure you will be fine!

Hurlyburly Sat 01-Sep-07 20:56:44

Pack your bags and run like hell and hope that reality don't catch you.

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