My feed
Premium

Please
or
to access all these features

Join our Primary Education forum to discuss starting school and helping your child get the most out of it.

Primary education

Friend boasting about Y1 reading levels

58 replies

CalamityJane10 · 02/11/2018 19:51

DS is Y1 and on Turquoise /level 7 book band. I thought he was doing really well; I am really proud of him.

Met an old friend today whose DD is same age and at a top London prep. She asked me outright what reading level DS is on and was visibly pleased when I told her.

So I (stupidly) asked about her DD and she said most of class are on Purple or level 8 and her DS has just been moved up to Gold.

I just feel really flat about it. DS is one of the stronger readers at his school but none are on level 8. Should I be worried?

OP posts:
Report
CoolGirlsNeverGetAngry · 02/11/2018 19:55

You should take this as a lesson that some people are twats and you shouldn’t get into conversations about stuff like this if you can avoid it.
She looked delighted about the reading levels in year one. You should def mention that your dc is reading Japanese at level five or something just to shout her up.

Report
CoolGirlsNeverGetAngry · 02/11/2018 19:56

*shut her up.
Oh and please don’t let this change your being proud of your kids achievement x

Report
SoyDora · 02/11/2018 19:58

Gosh, do people actually talk about this sort of stuff?

Report
KennDodd · 02/11/2018 19:59

What level is gold?

Report
user1468942365 · 02/11/2018 20:00

Apparently there's no real evidence that being "advanced" in y1 makes a toodle of difference in grown ups. And she's a twit. And not very nice.

Report
Starlight345 · 02/11/2018 20:05

This is why I never discuss my Ds. Some teachers push through reading levels quicker than others. If he is a strong reader be proud . At year one none of this maters . For some struggling it will just click and will steam ahead.

Take it all with a pinch of salt enjoy your ds’s progress.

I remember when my Ds was in reception . I had a friend we used to discuss how much our boys were enjoying reading in private as all friends of boys seemed to be struggling to get their boys to even do reading. They didn’t need to know this just wasn’t a parenting challenge for us . But even so we didn’t discuss levels.

Report
Soubriquet · 02/11/2018 20:06

Everyone’s kids learn differently

Dd is 5 and her reading skills are spectacular!

Her writing however, is very sloppy and needs lots of practice

Report
xyzandabc · 02/11/2018 20:10

Unless you go in to school an volunteer to hear the children read (in which case you certainly don't talk about other children's abilities outside of the classroom), how do either you, or she, know what levels every child in the class is on?

Heck I've done reading with kids an afternoon a week for 4 or 5 years now across a variety of year groups and I couldn't tell you what levels they are all on without looking it up. I have a general idea of some that I read frequently with but not more than that.

Report
ghostsandghoulies · 02/11/2018 20:10

Some people who choose private are insecure about their choice so revel in info like their kids are X years/months ahead of their state school counterparts. She's not a friend with her attitude so remember not to fall into the trap of comparing in future

Report
Ali1cedowntherabbithole · 02/11/2018 20:11

It's a lesson OP.

Back away slowly from the crazies.

Report
Ohyesiam · 02/11/2018 20:12

You have afirend problem , not a reading problem.
I generally cut people off for being so nasty, smug and unaware.

Report
Mummyshark2018 · 02/11/2018 20:17

As others have said some teachers push through levels quicker to others. Current dc teacher is very keen on comprehension (which is correct imo) and so takes longer to move to a different level. I would not worry about it. She was being a gloating twat! I would've loved to say something like 'only gold, I thought little Jonny would be on at least platinum by now given all that money you're spending' 

Report
LordPickle · 02/11/2018 20:32

Your "friend" is a smug twat. It's incredibly tacky to enquire about your friends kids so you can take the "opportunity" to brag about your own.

Report
CalamityJane10 · 02/11/2018 20:35

Thanks for the good advice. I wish I’d been quick enough to say some of the suggestions on here or just lie. She is normally lovely so I felt quite blindsided by it.
I am obviously still really proud of DS!

OP posts:
Report
Mrsr8 · 02/11/2018 20:38

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TheRollingCrone · 02/11/2018 20:42

Oh who was the fab poster on here who, when asked used to answer "She's on Black level, Black like her soul"

Grin genius

Report
FredFlinstoneMadeOfBones · 02/11/2018 21:53

Wow how embarrassing for her. I've put my foot in in before but if I'd acted like her I'd have been mortified with myself afterwards. Some schools are very pushy about getting children to higher reading levels, others prefer to focus on expression, comprehension and actually allowing the children to enjoy reading without pressure. Sounds like your DS is doing brilliantly. Ignore her friend and pit her child if she's going to use him to bolster her own self esteem.

Report
phantomofthenorthlaine · 02/11/2018 21:56

She's probably the type of person who goes through other DCs reading folders when they are at her house for a play date. Ugh.

Report
Cuckooclocks · 02/11/2018 22:00

Shake it off OP, it says more about her insecurities than anything else. Besides she might be exaggerating to make it seem it was worth sending her son to a top London prep.

Report
wtffgs2 · 02/11/2018 22:21

Jeez - she is a very insecure woman! Reading some artificially established "band" at X age doesn't mean little Jasper is on a fast-track to success.

Private schools have smaller class sizes which - I shit you not - lead to each kid getting more attention  Of course little J is powering through the bands.

Lots of us mere mortals send our kids to 30+ classes where the kids' reading isn't heard every day and quite a lot of our kids do ok - despite the shitty inadequacies of state education (ex-teacher who blames the system not the poor buggers working at the coal face!)

Your "friend" is a nob, btw 

Report
HettieBettie · 02/11/2018 22:23

All schools reading bands and levels differ your level 7 could be above their gold.

There is no set national banding for schools to use.

Report
HettieBettie · 02/11/2018 22:23

And your friend is a twat. So fuck her x

Report

Don’t want to miss threads like this?

Weekly

Sign up to our weekly round up and get all the best threads sent straight to your inbox!

Log in to update your newsletter preferences.

You've subscribed!

Spankyoumuchly · 02/11/2018 22:32

I hate this! Ds1 couldn't read until he was in year 4, so I couldn't join in with boasting at infant school. Poor me. He's at secondary school now and no-one has ever asked me about how his reading is. Which is a shame as he can read anything now. Bah!
Ignore and don't ask in future.

Report
Milliepatch · 02/11/2018 22:34

Gosh I'm a teacher and cant bare this type of competitive parenting Hmm. Turquoise is working above what we'd expect for year so dont let it affect you! Others are also correct some ramp through reading levels where as I would rather the ensure comprehension, innotation and retelling are secure too! X

Report
Milliepatch · 02/11/2018 22:35

Sorry for typos - new phone!

Report
Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.