5 yo dismissed to strannger

(87 Posts)
funnyfoursome Wed 18-Jul-18 17:21:38

OK I know it's the end of term and things get a bit lax but today I got stuck in a traffic jam on the way to pick up (temporary traffic lights that were stuck). Parent B calls me and asks if I'm stuck. I say yes and we agree that the school will hold onto them - there's nothing we can do. Normal procedure is that after 10 mins staff take the children to the front office and we then have to sign them out (and grovel!!). Unbeknownst to me Parent B calls Parent C (scatty childminder) who I don't know and my son doesn't know (no connection with any children in the year group). So apparently teacher hands over my son and Parent B's child to Parent C and I find them in the playground. Given that we have to give a phone call or written note for anyone else to take our child home I'm not v happy. According to my son she said to the teacher 'I'm taking these two' Surely this is a safeguarding issue if any old stranger can just pick up young children, or am I in an end of term grump??!!! (Be gentle am very tired!!)

OP’s posts: |
PalePinkSwan Wed 18-Jul-18 17:22:35

Jesus yes that’s a massive safeguarding issue.

Definitely complain in writing.

Caribbeanyesplease Wed 18-Jul-18 17:22:44

There is

So drop an email explaining your concern. I can’t see the dilemma

ReadingRiot Wed 18-Jul-18 17:26:42

It wasn't any old stranger it was someone the school knows to be a registered childminder, who was also collecting your child's friend.

Yes, that's they should have checked with you, but but you'd be amazed how many parents, when running late, send someone else without letting the school know. Even if the school had received a call authorising it, how were they to know it was from you?

funnyfoursome Wed 18-Jul-18 17:27:07

I don't like the feeling of ending on a bad note. Lovely NQT teacher. I already had a difficult meeting with the Head who thinks she's above herself recently ...

OP’s posts: |
Caribbeanyesplease Wed 18-Jul-18 17:27:22

*we agree that the school will hold onto them *

But you didn’t bother ringing, to check

funnyfoursome Wed 18-Jul-18 17:28:15

ReadingRiot - I'm pretty sure the teacher doesn't know the childminder as the teacher is an NQT and I've never seen the childminder pick up from Y1 before

OP’s posts: |


FlibbertyGiblets Wed 18-Jul-18 17:28:51

Sounds like the childminder was asked by your friend to hold the children in the playground and rang school with those instructions.
I don't see the problem.

funnyfoursome Wed 18-Jul-18 17:29:23

Carribean - I don't need to ring the school to check as the school are in loco parentis until I collect him as I do 5 days a week. Also I couldn't call as I was in the car

OP’s posts: |
Chocolala Wed 18-Jul-18 17:33:24

Parent B didn’t have any authority to give instructions to the school (or to C) in relation to Parent A’s child (unless OP comes back to say otherwise), in which case teacher has handed off a child to a third party without parental permission or consent. It’s a safeguarding issue and the school should be informed so they can reiterate proper procedures to the teachers.

WindDoesNotBreakTheBendyTree Wed 18-Jul-18 17:35:11

I don't see the problem either, tbh, in this particular instance

Will you be taking it up with your friend, B, who presumably was trying to help you out, and then couldn't communicate with you, as you were in the car?

Caribbeanyesplease Wed 18-Jul-18 17:36:42

You were going to be late.

Common courtesy if nothing else for goodness sakes

funnyfoursome Wed 18-Jul-18 17:36:56

Thanks Chocolala and everyone else. I guess I felt undermined as I've told my son not to go home with anyone else/ a stranger. I don't want it to happen to anyone else's kid and have a worse ending. Off to cook tea - thanks Mumsnet peeps x

OP’s posts: |
WindDoesNotBreakTheBendyTree Wed 18-Jul-18 17:37:17

Is parent B on your list of people who are allowed to pick up your child any time?

FeralBeryl Wed 18-Jul-18 17:37:30

Does school not have a password?
My DB has collected mine this week, the reception teacher has seen him collecting from her for the last 3 years but still wouldn't let Beryl out without him giving her the password grin he was not impressed, but I was.

funnyfoursome Wed 18-Jul-18 17:38:42

Yes I am trying to check with parent B exactly what was requested. Carribean you can get massive fines for using your phone in a car and my son's classroom is miles from the school Reception so it actually causes more work for staff if they have to run down with endless messages Thank You

OP’s posts: |
Caribbeanyesplease Wed 18-Jul-18 17:39:28

You were on your phone in the car to Parent B!

funnyfoursome Wed 18-Jul-18 17:39:52

Winddoewnotbend - no she isn't, only me and DH. Anything different gets communicated via a written note or email in our school

OP’s posts: |
Ucantarguewistupid Wed 18-Jul-18 17:41:12

Having a mobile phone in your hands when in a car even if stopped is now illegal in this country. Schools managed with children and late parents long before phones were invented never mind mobile phones.

Up could not and should not have called.

SleepWarrior Wed 18-Jul-18 17:41:16

I don't think you need to be angry or complain to the school as everything ended up ok, but I WOULD give them a heads-up type email.

Something explaining that whilst alls well that ends well, you absolutely had not given permission for your child to go with this woman, and that perhaps there are some staff that could with a recap of the safeguarding rules because handing kids to unknown adults doesn't always end that nicely.

Tomorrowillbeachicken Wed 18-Jul-18 17:50:46

Huge issue. this year the school refused to hand over one of my closest mum friends daughters. They phoned her first and I really respected that as they knew I knew child well but still checked.

Tomorrowillbeachicken Wed 18-Jul-18 17:54:41

Any children not collected by a certain time at our school get rounded up and taken to front door area. The parents are phoned and a teacher or staff member stays with them until collected

ReadingRiot Wed 18-Jul-18 17:57:12

At our school if you're more than 10 minutes late the children are taken to afters school club and you're expected to pay

Witchend Wed 18-Jul-18 18:12:59

Op answered the phone to parent B, so she can't then claim she couldn't call the school.

I suspect what happened though is parent B phoned the school, said they'd spoken to you and made this arrangement. I'd speak to parent B before anything else.

Tomorrowillbeachicken Wed 18-Jul-18 18:17:29

Parent B shouldn't have authority to do that

Join the discussion

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.

Join Mumsnet

Already have a Mumsnet account? Log in