Long post alert! Very unhappy with primary school offer

[elsieg1rl]

Looking for your advice please! We recently moved house and my daughter has been offered a reception place at the local state school, we are really unhappy with this school (from local feedback the teaching is poor quality, have been issues with bullying, overall quite a rough school). We are 6 on the waiting list for a nicer school nearby, and have been advised there tends to be lots of movement in August so we may get a place there. We also found a local private school that will really stretch us financially (esp. as we have baby no.2 due end of the year and I will be on mat pay) - would mean I'd have to go back to work after around 6 months in order to pay for everything (plus we'd have to pay childcare for child 2 and I worry about the effect on that baby of me going back to work so early). Would you a) start her at the local primary (maybe it's not as bad as I think?) and hope we get in somewhere else on the waiting list b) start her at the private school and hope we get in somewhere else on the waiting list C) any other suggestions based on your own experiences?

[soapboxqueen]

When is her birthday?

[GU24Mum]

Personally I'd start at the local state school first especially as there's a reasonable chance there will be movement on the waiting list for the other school. Schools often have gaps at the beginning of term and some parents don't want to move then if they've bought uniform etc. If you're considering, then spending a bit on a different colour (but presumably fairly standard) uniform is a no-brainer.

If you don't get into your preferred state school and don't like the one you've been allocated once you given it a go, you could look at the private options after that.

[BluthsFrozenBananas]

Are there any other schools in the local area you wouldn’t mind her going to and are not too far to travel to? I’d start her at the offered school and have her on as many waiting lists as possible. If you start at the private school you risk losing a terms fees if/when a place elsewhere comes up, I know someone that happened to.

[elsieg1rl]

End of December

[soapboxqueen]

Even if her birthday is in the autumn term she doesn't need to start her new place until January so you could delay her starting and see if there is any movement before making a decision about anything else .

I agree with pp that you could look at other state schools in the area to see if any would be suitable.

[elsieg1rl]

Ha sorry my previous comment was in response to soapboxqueen, I'm clearly not very tech savvy..

thanks for your responses so far - sound advice and very helpful

[Gizlotsmum]

Have you visited the school ?

[Enidblyton1]

Have you visited the poor primary and met the reception/y1 teachers? If you like the early years teachers, I would send your DD there until a place becomes available at the better primary (and always a chance the first school is better than you thought so she could end up staying there).

I would also caution going to the private school if money is a stretch. Depending on the school, it may not be better than the state option anyway. And I agree with pp that giving notice can be annoying if you suddenly get your preferred primary place and are forced to pay an extra terms fees to the private school.

[RedSkyAtNight]

Is the local feedback from people who actually have DC /have very recently had DC at the school? If not, discount it.

I'd personally start your DC there and see how you go. Definitely go for a visit and ask focused questions, if you haven't already.

Every school has bullying- it's how the school deals with it that is the issue.

[happinessiseggshaped]

I would visit and see it in person, if you still don't like the school I would keep her at home until you can get a place at a preferred school.

[mrsFruitLoops]

If private school fees will stretch you. ..what about when you add on uniforms and trips.

I would start at the school she has the place at but stay on the waiting list for the other.

You may find it isn't as bad as you thought. If it has a bad ofsted then it will have to jump through hoops and improve. Or it could just be a lot of snobs in the area.

Is there any other schools you could get to?

[Mary19]

You could home educate until a place comes up at your preferred school. Are there any other schools in the are you would accept. If so go on all the waiting lists.
You may be surprised by the school you are unhappy about have you been to visit?

[Hersetta427]

It does sound like private you stretch you too much and even if you started at private and got a place at your preferred state school who would still be liable for a whole terms fees as you will not be able to give the required notice (as the state place will only be held for a very short while).

[hilbobaggins]

What actual evidence do you have of poor teaching and problems with bullying? It’s so easy to get sucked into anecdotes about what’s going wrong with a school but what that actually means for YOUR child is something else altogether.

Just start her at the school and put her name down at the school you’d prefer and wait for a place to come up. When it does you can decide what to do. Who knows, you might get a great cohort and reception teacher and it’ll go really smoothly! The school choice thing always feels like a massive life and death thing but it’s really not, especially if there’s a lot of movement in the area.

[user789653241]

School can change over the years. Have you actually seen the school and met the staff?

The school where my ds go to is the best one in the area when we applied. There was a school in rough area which no one wanted to go.
Years later, the school people despised is now one of the best in the county, and people who moved from there to our school are very gutted.
You need to see the school and judge yourself, before rejecting only because of the prior reputation.

[Thesearepearls]

I'd personally avoid private schools if it's going to be a financial stretch

Because it doesn't end (t-shirts on free supply) and you just calculate the cost now but once they're in the private system it is not easy to get out ... £360k later (two DC educated privately from 3-18) we're now looking at years of funding for university education. We thought we could afford it easily but in the end it was a stretch.

[pinkdelight]

Definitely option A. You might find the local school is fine. People around here can completely discount some schools based on their history but it's no reflection of how the schools are right now, and everyone's experience is different anyway. Give it a try and see for yourself. The private option will be there anyway as back up.

[Andcake]

Why didn't you look into this before you moved-chose new location. Seems like you had some level of choice as you can afford private...