WWYD? School place has come up

(9 Posts)
LotsToThinkOf Mon 04-Jun-18 15:07:11

My DS didn't get a place in our first choice school, the one he attended for nursery. All of the other children in the class got a place except for him. The school we were allocated has grown on me over the year, DH liked it immediately and more importantly DS seems to like it. He's doing well.

I've now been told that there will be a space in year 1 from September at the school he missed out on, obviously we will have to reapply as the waiting lists only exist until the December after allocations. We were top of the waiting list until it was disbanded, but the criteria would be applied to anyone applying so he may not even be given the place.

I don't know what to do, DS was asked (not directly, I didn't want to make him anxious and he's only 5) and he said he likes his new class and school. So I know he's happy, but he was happy at his nursery school and he had so many friends. This was the information I needed last year, I'd have sent him there last September without a doubt.

Both schools are 'good' schools, but I'm so torn. We researched before applying for nursery and actually turned down his place at the one he ended up at, we made that decision based on the teachers, feel of the school etc. But now DS has had a year of settling in (which was so hard for him) and making new friends (also hard, and he has good friends now). We've also kept in touch with his nursery friends so he has the 2 sets of friends.

I just don't know what to do. Would you apply and move back, knowing it would cause upheaval and heartache at leaving his new school and friends? Or would you accept that things have changed, the new school is working out fine and therefore DS shouldn't be moved?

It was so hard for him having to leave everyone and settle in at the new school, maybe I'd be being unfair if he had to leave his new school? But then we chose it in the first instance because it was the better school and that hasn't changed.

Help! What would you do? Sorry for the rambling, this is very difficult.

OP’s posts: |
AjasLipstick Mon 04-Jun-18 15:20:57

The school we were allocated has grown on me over the year, DH liked it immediately and more importantly DS seems to like it. He's doing well.

Both schools are 'good' schools

That's your answer OP. Of course you should not move him. You have no reason to.

You're just afraid because you seem to have been offered what you want...but it's what you WANTED.

Not what you now want.

He's happy...that's all any of us want.

HeadsDownThumbsUpEveryone Mon 04-Jun-18 15:26:11

He's happy...that's all any of us want.

This a million times this!

Please don't move him, he is doing well, has friends and is still able to play with his old nursery friends. I honestly do not see what you would gain by moving him but I can see so much that you could lose.

puppywithattitude Mon 04-Jun-18 15:29:02

He's happy, don't move him.
If it ain't broke and all that.....

TheIsland Mon 04-Jun-18 15:30:11

Don’t move him!!

LotsToThinkOf Mon 04-Jun-18 15:33:00

Thank you, thank you for the replies. They are exactly what I needed to hear. Right now my heart is saying don't move him because he's happy - it was just confusing as the stress of last year and not getting a place was so emotional. He had to leave everyone behind and he was heartbroken. I just wanted to make it better for him and at the time the school he missed out on was 'better' so I would have done anything to get him back in there. That emotion needs to stay in the past.

Decision made, he's staying put.

Thank you again x

OP’s posts: |
Mumtofourandnomore Wed 06-Jun-18 22:53:05

This happened to us at the end of YR with my firstborn (now a teenager lol). We stuck with our allocated school and turned our first choice down and it was the best thing we did. It actually turned out that the head of our first choice had changed and it was not at all the school we thought it was. Stick with what you've got, ds is happy, you are happy, he has friends - enough said.


Couchpotato3 Wed 06-Jun-18 22:58:22

A year is a really long time for a child and he has clearly moved on and settled happily where he is. He didn't find the move easy, and doing it again could really upset everything. How would you feel if you moved him now and things went badly downhill? I really wouldn't risk it.

BubblesBuddy Thu 07-Jun-18 14:28:06

I think what your dilemma shows is how difficult it is to judge a school when you visit. Your allocated school has been much better than you thought so you have a happy child. Children do not make friends for life at nursery, or even in primary school. He has a group of friends, though, and that is excellent, plus friends from nursery. They may fade as his school friendships get stronger.

Grass is not always greener -by the way!!!!

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