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Would I be “that parent”...

(34 Posts)
Spindelina Sat 21-Oct-17 17:37:12

... if I sent a polite email to the school pointing out the inconsistencies between the school uniform as listed on the pdf buried in the school’s website, and that listed in the reminder in the latest newsletter?

I’m a pedant and this annoys me. Should I let it go (and give away the shoes I’ve bought that comply with the pdf)?

MrsKCastle Sat 21-Oct-17 17:38:24

No, you wouldn't be that parent. They need to clarify the rules.

Santawontbelong Sat 21-Oct-17 17:39:48

I am with you op. . Ds has been threatened with exclusion for wearing black skinny school uniform trousers from Asda - been accused of wearing his Saturday night out pants!! He is 13!! School regs just say black school trousers. .

MrsHathaway Sat 21-Oct-17 17:41:14

Depends on the phrasing. I queried one year when the list said logo optional and the snotty newsletter reminder said logo compulsory. I can't have been the only one as there was a retraction the following week, followed the next year by a new official policy - but with enough notice.

Flicketyflack Sat 21-Oct-17 17:47:22

Why do you ‘need’ to point out the inconsistencies? Because you need clarification or because you want to be a pedant?

Depending on your answer you may or may not be ‘that parent’ .

Spindelina Sat 21-Oct-17 17:48:44

PDF says shoes to be black or blue, newsletter says black only.

Reverse for PE shorts (pdf: blue, newsletter: black or blue - I’ve turned down many a pair of hand-me-down black shorts!)

And last (and least) the newsletter is getting fussy about colour of hair accessories, not mentioned at all in pdf.

So not major differences, but more than interpretation.

Flicketyflack Sat 21-Oct-17 17:48:48

Schools have enough things to worry about in the current economic climate than answer these kinds if emails ime.

Flicketyflack Sat 21-Oct-17 17:49:46

Perhaps catch up with HT to seek clarity? It may come across better than an email?

FATEdestiny Sat 21-Oct-17 17:51:37

What is the inconsistency?

I would say you go by the official uniform policy on the school website. The mistake is more likely to be in the newsletter than the policy document.

I want to bring my child's school to task on "skirts must be knew length" because I consider it sexist. I don't know if I have it in me at the moment to raise the issue though.

CrumpettyTree Sat 21-Oct-17 17:51:44

No you wouldn't be that parent.

Spindelina Sat 21-Oct-17 17:51:54

Flickety, mainly because I’m a pedant, to be honest.

If I weren’t, I would just let DD wear anything on either list and wait to be pulled up on it before I point it out. But that would be breaking the rules (whichever rules you choose), and I find that difficult grin.

FATEdestiny Sat 21-Oct-17 17:53:53

I've never heard of blue school shoes. They must be really difficult to find.

Flicketyflack Sat 21-Oct-17 17:55:00

Thanks for honestygrin

It’s your call! Personally I would not fret over the small stuff if you want to be taken seriously about the bigger things that may come along wink.

Spindelina Sat 21-Oct-17 17:55:23

She’s got blue sandals for summer (the sandal bit isn’t a problem, unusually).

CrumpettyTree Sat 21-Oct-17 18:00:53

The problem is it's caused you to waste your money unnecessarily. I'm not someone who complains about school uniform rules and the dc don't have any uniform issues, but it would be a pain if the uniform list stipulated different thungs depending on where you looked it up. Just ask. I'm sure they won't mind

RafaIsTheKingOfClay Sat 21-Oct-17 18:01:32

I don't think you'd be that parent to clarify the inconsistencies. It's not like new shoes are cheap if parents suddenly find they have the 'wrong' colour.

BenLui Sat 21-Oct-17 18:05:36

You could just send them a brief, polite and cheerful email saying that you are a bit confused and can they clarify.

irvineoneohone Sat 21-Oct-17 18:07:04

If it was me, one says "black", and another says "black" and "blue", I would just stick to black.
But maybe our school is very lax about uniform, as long as it's not big difference. Uniform rule says dark grey trousers, but many people are wearing black. School is totally fine.
If I'm going to point out, I would speak to office team rather than teachher or HT, and clarify it. Not as if they made a mistake but to make sure what is acceptable.

MrsHathaway Sat 21-Oct-17 18:37:30

I think if your email starts with a bit of general waffle about your support for uniform and school rules in general, and then asks if the newsletter represents an update to the rules given the changes, then it's more obviously "trying to ensure compliance" rather than "complaining for the sake of it".

If you're in the UK, buying summer sandals now is a bit odd as you don't know what size she'll need grin

RafaIsTheKingOfClay Sat 21-Oct-17 19:29:29

I think that's probably fine and what most people would do if you have both sets of rules when you buy the uniform, irvine

But I'd guess there are very few parents buying new uniform at this point in the year.

Spindelina Sat 21-Oct-17 20:04:52

Email sent. Very friendly, just clarifying, blah blah. Much calmer than the grumpy draft I wrote before my OP grin.

MrsH I’ve guessed what size she might be next summer (or maybe the summer after) because cheap sandals. They’re not exactly fitted and she’ll only wear them for a few weeks so I’m not fussed if they don’t fit like a glove.

Rafa there will be parents (eg me) who have followed the pdf and now had to change. In my case that was nipping out to buy black hair bands!

user1487194234 Sat 21-Oct-17 22:15:04

Yes in ny school you would be that parent Not to say don't do it bu accept what it signifies

RafaIsTheKingOfClay Sat 21-Oct-17 23:14:48

You got off lightly then. grin

ilovesushi Sun 22-Oct-17 09:24:50

Who cares if you are that parent. Stick up for yourself and your kids. Are you trying to be the school's best friend, gain brownie points? Not even sure what "that parent" means. If it means being confident, assertive, calling them out on bullish*t, advocating for your child, then embrace being that parent.

Spindelina Sun 22-Oct-17 09:30:11

sushi, I think that parent is the one who cries wolf.

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