coping with a super strict y2 teacher

[superspidey]

Ds is 4 weeks into year 2 and having previously loved every single thing about school is now not enjoying it at all.

His new teacher is very loud and shouty. She's got a reputation for blowing things massively out of proportion and sanctioning every single thing with harsh punishments. Ds has been in trouble constantly since the start of term but all quite low level stuff. Unacceptable obviously but new behaviour for him and I think it's the only way he can express how he's feeling in that environment. Other children are constantly being sent out of the classroom or to the head. She loudly tells the parents at the end of the day what each child's misdemeanours are which is hugely embarrassing for the children and all the adults involved and those in earshot.

I get that it's start of term and teachers are laying down the law but this approach doesn't seem to be working, the classroom behaviour seems to be getting worse if anything!

Ds is 6 and is a bag of nerves. He got in a flap because he couldn't remember whether he was supposed to put his finger on his lips when sat on the carpet or not. I want to give him some strategies of how to cope in this environment but all I've got is keep your head down and don't say or do anything.....not great for a 6 yo in a ks1 class!!

Help!!

[catkind]

How about telling him to watch what the other children are doing if he can't remember? Chances are everyone won't forget the same thing at the same time.

I might also mention to teacher that he was getting scared about not being able to remember all the class rules, and is there something in writing you could go through with him to help him or similar? If not may at least give her the heads up to give them more reminders while they're learning.

And would definitely be having words if a teacher started telling me my child's misdemeanors loudly in front of other parents. That's not on. If it's bad enough you need to know, it's bad enough for a private talk I reckon. "Please could we have this discussion in private?" or suggest a behaviour diary so she can write it down rather than shouting it at all.

It may lighten up as the term goes on. Some teachers try to make an impression at the beginning of term so everyone's on their best behaviour. Is she an experienced Y2 teacher, or new/moved from a different year? If she's come from an older year she might not quite have adjusted to what you can reasonably expect from Y2s yet.

[superspidey]

Thanks catkind, I'll def try the looking around at others. Don't know why I didn't think of that before!

Teacher has been a y6 teacher for years. May have the bar set a bit high for 6yo's.

[StarfishSeahorse]

Whilst I can understand wanting to set the tone and making her expectations clear at the start of the year, causing fear and anxiety in 6 year old is not on in my opinion.
Speak to her in private and let her know how her approach is affecting your child.

[Ttbb]

Just tell him not to worry what the teacher says-she's got a bit of complex and her opinion isn't important.

[orangeowls]

Ttbb that just sets him up for a really hard year

[LorLorr2]

Trying to think what I would do if it were me, I would probably check the other parents feel the same way and are having the same issue, then with their backing ask to speak to her and tell her on everyone's behalf that her methods are making school an unpleasant environment. If it carried on or didn't get resolved I'd think about going to the head tbh

[baddaytoday]

I know there's a few parents who are getting the same treatment and their children's behaviour has deteriorated. I don't think it's everyone though. I guess she's trying to make an example of some children. But ds in particular needs to feel safe and secure or his emotions unravel which I think is where his behaviour is coming from. Ds says certain children get in to trouble for things that other children don't - this is making him more confused.

[baddaytoday]

Ttbb- is love to say that but I do t think it would help!

[baddaytoday]

Don't even!

[jamdonut]

Ttbb

Really? Ignore the teacher, Her opinion doesn't matter?

[Feenie]

and tell her on everyone's behalf

Overstepping the mark. Massively.

[LorLorr2]

Feenie If OP were to male it seem she's the only one with the problem the teacher would probably think she's just being precious. I wouldn't give a shit about overstepping personally haha

[LorLorr2]

*make it

[PigletWasPoohsFriend]

Just tell him not to worry what the teacher says-she's got a bit of complex and her opinion isn't important.

Righto

OP I think you have a name change fail.

[Feenie]

with their backing ask to speak to her and tell her on everyone's behalf that her methods are making school an unpleasant environment

I wouldn't give a shit about overstepping personally haha

The head most certainly would and there would definitely be consequences - for you, not for the teacher.

[catkind]

Not sure about consequences except for looking a prat. But I would think several parents going in talking about the problems their own children are experiencing would be far more effective. Your own child is your business, and quite rightly all the teacher is going to be prepared to talk to you about. I would absolutely expect a teacher to take one child's experience in the classroom seriously. If other children have the same issues, their parents talk to teacher about their experience. Much more impact, teacher gets properly independent views.

[Ginmummy1]

Fully agree with Catkind.

[PerfumeIsAMessage]

How about telling him he's going to be having a lot of teachers during the next 14 or so years and it would be helpful for his future to behave in class? That might be a start. Tell him some of his teachers will be stricter than others. He's 6, not 4. If he is having trouble remembering the instructions for carpet time, then he needs to pay more attention when he's being given them.

Where has all your detailed information about her reputation come from OP(s)?

If you are concerned about your own child, then arrange an appointment with the teacher. Don't, for goodness sake, start mouthing off on behalf of the rest of the class. You will be that parent if you go in now, 3 weeks into term and complain.

[corythatwas]

Perfume, if the OP observes the teacher speaking loudly in the playground about other children's misdemeanours, then she hardly has to hunt very far for information, does she?

And yes, it is perfectly ok to go in 3 weeks into the term and talk about a problem your child has. You do it tactfully, of course, but it's perfectly ok to do it.

I would go with everything catkind says, that seems the approach most likely to get results.

[user789653241]

It really doesn't make sense, only way to express how he's feeling for having a strict teacher, is to misbehave and get into trouble. Does she punish children for unreasonable reason?

I was a bit worried about my ds's teacher this year, since I heard playground gossip that she is the most strict teacher in school, and my ds can be cheeky sometimes.
He told me he has been told off for something already. But I asked him how's your new teacher this morning, he says she's great.
I love strict (but not shouty) teacher.

[Witchend]

The other question is whether these new low-level behaviours are really new, or is it perhaps that she's picking up on things that last year's teacher let lie?

I know my year 2 teacher had a reputation for being really strict, and I can remember her picking up on things and sitting there thinking "that wasn't a problem last year, she's mean". Looking back as an adult I can see that perhaps the very gentle year 1 teacher should have dealt with it more than she shouldn't have. Also it felt really stressful the first couple of weeks, but then we realised that although strict, she was usually very fair and we liked her for it.

[notarehearsal]

What is it with some teachers, they do actually seem to believe they are God like and no parent is able to challenge their behaviour? Having worked within Education primarily with behaviour for many years I saw these bad eggs over and over again. ( of course not just in teaching, within SW and Health too. But always where there is an imbalance of power) Parents need to challenge a bully. Otherwise the behaviour is seen to be acceptable. Discussing a little boy within earshot of other parents is just pushing her weight around. If my 6 year old was frightened of an adult and her behaviour was making him a bag of nerves I'd be wanting to know exactly why. Why is she 'shouty'? What bloody right has she got to shout at children? Oh and before the Teacher worshipers attack, no, it's not necessary to scare little children into a bag of nerves

[PigletWasPoohsFriend]

Oh and before the Teacher worshipers attack

teacher worshipers

[MrsHoneysHat]

I would absolutely raise your concerns - my DD started bedwetting after leaving a lovely warm nurturing year 2 teacher and going to a more harsh punitive year 3 teacher - nothing wring with discipline but for some children that contrast is very difficult to cope with. I only fully realised what was causing the bedwetting when she told me over the six weeks holiday she used to have nightmares about getting her artwork wrong. She's also now said she's relieved to be out of that class. I wish i had realused sooner and said something.

[Feenie]

Christ knows what a 'Teacher worshiper' is. Got me stumped.