Moving to the UK, how far behind will my child be?

(164 Posts)
thequeenofconfused Fri 26-May-17 17:23:46

My son is 5 has had no formal education of any kind as compulsory school doesn't start here for another couple of years.
He can recognizes numbers to about 10 but no letters or words, he knows English as we are a bilingual family but I'm sure his use will be far behind that of his peers.
potty training wise he is in pullups, still using them to poop, but okay for wee, he should be okay at school in underpants, what happens when he has an accident?
What should a 5 year old know to 'fit in' with other children of the same age in the uk?

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2014newme Fri 26-May-17 17:26:24

You need to resolve the toilet issues as a priority. Can you do some letter recognition or phonics with him and expand his number awareness?

thequeenofconfused Fri 26-May-17 17:31:44

Thank you. Do you have any product suggestions or sites to teach phonics, as I've heard it's not the same as American phonics.

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Flushedwithsomething Fri 26-May-17 17:36:18

This might be useful. Is there a developmental reason he is still not potty trained? It would be considered unusual here.

sirfredfredgeorge Fri 26-May-17 17:38:32

Will he be going in to year 2 or year 1 on arrival?

If he's a summer born 5 and going in to year 2, he'll stand out an awful lot more than if he's going into year 1. Year 1, he may well find some similar level peers, but if it's year 2, he's more likely to feel the odd one out.

Mary21 Fri 26-May-17 17:38:37

School will expect him to be out of pull ups unless he has some special needs that preclude this. He will be expected to change himself for pe, put on and take of his coat, carry his lunch tray etc. He will be expected to be able to sit quietly on the carpet and listen, comply with instructions, wait his turn .
5 year olds do have accidents and many schools have spare sets of trouser and pants but they would be hoping not to need them.
Depending where in the country you are moving to schools are used to pupils arriving from abroad with varying pre knowledge.
Schools use phonics to teach reading so don't try and teach him to read in preparation using other methods. Its probibly best just to read lots to him. Ensure his fine motor skills are good so he is ready to learn to write. Use things like lego, threading, helping you cook. Use terms such as half , quarter when cutting cakes, pizza, get him to help with shopping, handling coins counting money, telling time. Then he will be in a good place to start learning. Others will be ahead but he should catch up fast.

thequeenofconfused Fri 26-May-17 17:44:14

He's behind here too toilet wise, but it didn't matter as he only goes to the daycare and they change him.
He holds his poop in until he has a pullup on, he's never wiped himself i don't know any 5 year olds that can.

Thank you for that list, most of those he's okay in. I'm panicking less now.

I tihnk he will be in year 1 he was 5 in October.

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2014newme Fri 26-May-17 17:48:07

He needs to use the toilet properly, wipe himself, wash his hands etc.
Has he been babied do you think? Can you get nursery to help you toilet train him?
He will stand out in school if he can't use a toilet. They won't wipe him although they will deal with an accident but it could be embarrassing for him.

thequeenofconfused Fri 26-May-17 17:51:16

He is my only child maybe i babied him too much.

I will talk to his daycare.

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ijustwannadance Fri 26-May-17 17:52:44

He will be a bit behind but it's essential you get the toilet thing sorted. They will not take him to the toilet or wipe him.

He will be in year 1 but one of the oldest.

ChampagneSocialist1 Fri 26-May-17 17:54:40

He will go into reception class I agree with the others getting him toilet trained should be your main concern now if you want him to start school

ChampagneSocialist1 Fri 26-May-17 17:56:14

Apologies not reception but year 1 but a year 1 child not out of pull ups will be an issue here unless Special needs

ijustwannadance Fri 26-May-17 17:59:49

Yes, depends when you are actually moving here.
Now= reception, but only for a few weeks
Sept= year 1

thequeenofconfused Fri 26-May-17 18:02:15

we are moving early July.

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mellowbean Fri 26-May-17 18:02:47

He won't be allowed in school if he's not toilet trained. If he soils himself teachers won't clean him they will give him clothes and expect him to sort himself out.

mrz Fri 26-May-17 18:04:45

Schools can not bar a child simply because they aren't toilet trained (it's illegal) but he would stand out.

thequeenofconfused Fri 26-May-17 18:09:17

OK more practice with potty training and the self care is the top of the list.

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LIZS Fri 26-May-17 18:09:53

As he's already 5 he would be expected to be in ft school/education straight away. By early July there will only be a few weeks left before Summer break and you may not find a space immediately. If you know where you will be living it might be worth making enquiries and visit before they finish. Are there any SN which hinder his toilet training or have you just not pushed it? He needs to be continent as schools do not have resources to assist him on a regular basis and accidents are the exception, especially in y1. Academically the ability range is wide so that will be less of an issue.

thequeenofconfused Fri 26-May-17 18:10:03

what about phonics mentioned above are there any tools i can use to build this skill?

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LIZS Fri 26-May-17 18:11:02

It used to be Jolly Phonics but things may have moved on.

thequeenofconfused Fri 26-May-17 18:11:26

It's my fault LIZs i have not pushed it very much as i have not needed to. maybe i have been too relaxed.

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AgentOprah Fri 26-May-17 18:12:59

If you Google "early learning goals" you will see what children are typically expected to do by the end of the reception year. Independent toileting, basic phonics and numbers to 20 will definitely help.

ijustwannadance Fri 26-May-17 18:13:18

Look at jolly phonics website or app.
Is he able to use technology? Pad or smartphone?

thequeenofconfused Fri 26-May-17 18:15:32

yes he's able to use tech.

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thequeenofconfused Fri 26-May-17 18:15:59

i will get this app thank you.

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