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Worries about 5 Yr old DD Attention in school

(16 Posts)
Dizzybintess Mon 03-Oct-16 16:46:16

my daughter is 5 and in year 1 she is verbally very bright and well behaved and kind, she will make up fantastic stories and she has lots of friends seems to love school.

I have noticed for the last couple of months that it is extremely difficult to get her to focus on anything academic. she will focus on things like games and will even sit for things like monopoly.

I assumed she was concentrating in school as there were no issues brought up in reception.

I got called into a meeting today where the teacher explained that she is not doing any work in class, she is not focusing on anything, has an extremely short attention span, and responding to every question with "I don't know" They said whatever they ask her to do...she just sits there and does nothing. I cam out of the meeting feeling like I had been punched in the gut.
the teacher has suggested bringing her bedtime forward as it may be tiredness. has anyone else had a similar issue.

Dizzybintess Mon 03-Oct-16 17:23:11

She is going to bed at 7pm tonight!!

irvineoneohone Mon 03-Oct-16 20:22:56

There's thread about dc saying "I don't know" in Gifted and Talented board if you are intrested.

My ds was away with fairies all the time when he was around that age. (YR4(8) now.) He was able to focus on something he likes/loves, but can even forget he was eating sometimes. It seemed to become better with age, not too bad now.

If you are concerned about her learning and she likes games, can you let her play educational games online or on apps on ipad?

Sleep has been a big issue with my ds. But my ds doesn't seems to suffer from late night at all. Does she suffer?

My ds is very bright, but I always think he may fall into twice exceptional category. He doesn't have strong feature but always shown slight traits of adhd/asd.

MilkRunningOutAgain Mon 03-Oct-16 20:25:42

You could try encouraging her to join in, and trying to find out why she won't join in. I realise it's hard to get a 5 year old to explain things like this clearly. My DS wouldn't join in somethings because of a fear of failing, but it took ages to realise what was going on and encourage him to try things.

Did the teacher tell you how she / he intends to help your DD to join in? I think you will need another meeting to discuss this. And perhaps how you can help, so you'll act together.

Monopoly is a complicated game for a yr 1 to play, she must be concentrating to do this. Can she read ? Does she read to you? Does she achieve the same things at school and home or is there a big difference?

gillybeanz Mon 03-Oct-16 20:32:33

She sounds just like my dd did, we are waiting for a diagnosis atm, she is 12 now. CAMHS believe from initial assessment ADHD and ASD
My dd is very gifted, and was the same as yours at this age.

I wish you luck, don't be fobbed off if it doesn't improve. At least her teachers know there is a problem.
Is she asleep all the time, mine would never stay asleep, I didn't know as I never caught her awake. When she told me I'd sneak in at all times and she was awake sad
Sleep improved at start of new school.

Imaginosity Mon 03-Oct-16 21:06:29

Would she be motivated by working for a reward?

My DS had high functioning autism and he used to refuse to do schoolwork. He now has a little chart on his table in school and everytime he completes a piece of work he earns a smiley face. The teacher gives him a reward when he collects so many but maybe your DD's teacher could pass the chart on to you. You could reward her with a cartoon or chance to do something with you.

Using this approach has transformed my DS from a boy who was happy to daydream all day to one who generally gets all his work done.

Dizzybintess Mon 03-Oct-16 22:49:26

Thanks guys x
She is Definately motivated by reward and recognition.
When she reads she is all over the place flailing and her eyes are not focussing on the book. When she does try her best she is coming along ok with the reading.
Eating is an issue. There is not much weight to her and she can barely be arsed with eating. It's like it is a chore.
I am wondering if it is adhd to be honest. I am 38 years old and as a child I was apparently exactly the same. To the extent that my teachers questioned whether I was having petit map fits as I would space out. I am a little better now but still struggle With focussing on conversation And reading and not procrastinating, I have a degree but I felt like I had to work super hard in uni to focus on everything.

Dizzybintess Mon 03-Oct-16 22:51:30

She sleeps well. She was going to bed at 8 every night (well bed at 7.30 but messing around with stuffed toys in bed until 8)
Tonight I removed all the stuffed toys and left her with one and put her to bed at 7.15. She was asleep by 7.25 which is good

Dizzybintess Mon 03-Oct-16 22:52:58

Petit mal not map lol

FadedRed Mon 03-Oct-16 23:05:51

A couple of things to check are eyesight and hearing. She may be not seeing properly or missing hearing instructions, which would be more difficult in a classroom than in a one to one situation which she would have at home with you.
Worth ruling out that either of these might be a problem.

Dizzybintess Mon 03-Oct-16 23:15:44

She had an eyesight test a month ago. The optician actually ran 3D tests on her as he was gobsmacked a 5 year old would let him do all the tests. She has perfect Vision.

She had a perforated eardrum in Jan however since then she has had a school hearing test that was normal (not sure how scientific the reception hearing test is though)

I plan to take her to the GP on Wednesday with my DH

junebirthdaygirl Tue 04-Oct-16 00:44:32

She may be dyslexic. Often orally bright but lack concentration and have no idea idea what's going on I n reading / phonics. Her eyes going everywhere can be a tracking problem associated with dyslexia.

Dizzybintess Tue 04-Oct-16 07:37:10

My husband is mildly dyslexic. I have brought that up from the start. Would that affect other things like eating and maths too.
The teacher said it seems to be extending to any activity apart from art

irvineoneohone Tue 04-Oct-16 08:20:20

My ds has issue with eating. I assume it's more to do with asd traits than dyslexia, sensory issues, like texture and temperature, etc.(I maybe wrong.)
Eating is definitely chore for my ds. Don't know about maths, my ds is rather gifted in maths.
Is she gifted artist? Does she find school work too boring?
My Dsis was like your dd, always getting into trouble for not concentrating. Later when she was older, she told me she found school extremely dull. She was truly gifted child(especially artistic and creative) with photographic memory.

KingLooieCatz Tue 04-Oct-16 08:22:44

It is irksome when a school's "go to" theory for a child's difficulty is parenting e.g. bedtime. We've had that too. More sleep might help but if I were you I'd push back a bit politely with the school and ask what they are doing. They'd love to transfer responsibility after letting you sail on for so long without discussing the difficulties she's having with you. I might be projecting from a bad experience. DS last school started all that when does he go to bed and does he have smarties for breakfast stuff. CAMHS initial screening confirmed our bedtime routine is gold standard. DS gets in excess of the NHS guideline hours of sleep for his age. Onto the next theory please. In DS's case a combination of growing up a bit and having a fantastic teacher seems to have done the trick. He is 7. On the waiting list for an ADHD assessment but it looks like he might not need it any more. HFASD I could believe though.

Dizzybintess Tue 04-Oct-16 14:40:26

I have worked at the school for 5 years and only just finished there so they know me well but it was upsetting to have your parenting skills questioned.
She has always slept very well and she had a healthy diet.
They commented on how pale she looks all the time. I'm a red head and even though she is blonde she has my winter time colouring.
I'm going to take her to the GP in the morning to have a chat With them xxx

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