Bit of a wee rant about kids who never get picked(6 Posts)
Yet again my 11 year old has come home in tears because she's not been picked for an important role at school. Every year they choose children for various jobs - pupil council, eco representative, sports representative, and then there's the various poetry competitions, art competitions, music competitions. This year she;s in her final year, so there's the added positions of House Captain and Assistant Captain. Every year she slogs her little guts out writing essays or preparing speeches as her "application" for these positions, gets her hopes up and then gets knocked back flat. Every year we have the tears and snotters and every year she picks herself up and tries again.
I don't believe in the "everyone's a winner" mentality but some of the kids who have been given positions as house captains were sports reps last year, and on the pupil council the year before that. This isn't really about academic or sporting excellence, it's about the teachers not having the common sense to keep a wee list as the class progresses through the school saying who's had a shot and who hasn't.
She is so, so disappointed and I can completely get where she's coming from.
You have my sympathy. I also have an over-looked dd who never got picked for anything at primary school.
She finished primary school at the end of the summer and the leavers book had a self-portrait of everyone in the year on the cover. Hers wasn't there. It kind of summed up her whole experience of primary school for me - the invisible child.
Sending you and your dd
My dd's primary school was like a series of 'Glee'. Some kids were the main characters who did absolutely everything. From being school captain to holding the teachers keys on the way to assembly.
Others, like my dd, were extras. They were there but they never got any lines.
It's all change now she's in year seven.
Invisible about sums it up. She is an average student - a plodder. Not badly behaved or demanding of teacher attention. She isn't a music star. Not a sports star. Always gets good reports but constantly overlooked for the stuff which is important to her.
What upsets her the most is that she tried really hard, and thinks the people who did get picked didn't put in as much effort. At least I suppose she can say it's helped her become more resilient in standing up to constant knock backs.
Do you watch The Middle? Well I was/am Sue Heck. The one and only time I was recognised in school for my work they got my name wrong. I feel for her I really do. Average students are often sadly overlooked as both the top end and bottom end of classes seem to demand the attention, the rest of us plodders are expected to just get on with it.
It's going to be the same all over when they cast the Christmas show - the shouty, loud, attention-demanding ones are given the roles and the rest are miserable about it. She's one of 31 in her class and just gets lost in the crowd. It's really knocking her confidence though and I struggle to know what to say to comfort her.
Her brothers couldn't give two hoots about being chosen for things or not - it doesn't matter to them. I just can't see what's so hard about keeping records of who is applying for certain positions each year and who gets them, so make sure you're not picking the same kids over and over and overlooking the same children every year.
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