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A mum just told me yr 5 sex ed is explicit and she was gutted

(178 Posts)
PartyFants Thu 18-Aug-16 18:16:33

Title says it all, her dc is going into year 6, mine is going into year 5. Different schools though, if it matters. She warned me to check the sex ed material before they learn it as she was gutted when she heard how explicit it was, apparently many parents complained.

I'm not a prude, I'm happy for them to learn age appropriate stuff, eggs, sperm, erections, wet dreams etc but he's not a streetwise kid, he's so innocent and sweet I don't like the thought of him having to learn about extra bits like for example oral sex (or whatever she meant by explicit, we didn't discuss specifics) I've only just got him to stop drinking the bath water "because there's bottom germs in there" confused

I'm a bit spooked, anyone with a year 6 or above child who can give me their experience with the module, please?

Crispsheets Thu 18-Aug-16 18:17:14

Go and ask the teacher.

eyebrowsonfleek Thu 18-Aug-16 18:19:04

What she said.
Oral sec, masturbation and contraception is mentioned at our school.

JenLindley Thu 18-Aug-16 18:19:44

he's so innocent and sweet

So he'll be guilty and unpleasant after he knows about sex? hmm

SharingMichelle Thu 18-Aug-16 18:19:57

1. You need to ask your school exactly what they teach.

2. Children should know this stuff. There is nothing to be gained from keeping it a secret.

PartyFants Thu 18-Aug-16 18:22:37

Don't try to imply I'll think less of him because I love his innocence, thanks. I'm allowed to. I just said I'm happy for him to learn, as long as it's age appropriate.

Nicknamegrief Thu 18-Aug-16 18:23:17

It was nothing like that for my year five children x2. It was more about some of the changes your body goes through during puberty.
Ask the teachers to see the curriculum and if you aren't happy with it you can always opt out.
However from what I gather it's not what is taught in school but rather what the other children tell them (show them- a child was caught showing pornography they had downloaded on their iPad in the playground (Not school) in my friend's estate recently).

CusheyButterfield Thu 18-Aug-16 18:23:26

While it sounds pretty full on, I'd much rather my child had it explained by the teacher, rather than them being removed and then hearing the mangled version the rest of the class were discussing at break time.

Haggisfish Thu 18-Aug-16 18:23:27

I despair. Knowing about sex doesn't mean a child is not still innocent. It means, statistically, they are much less likely to suffer the effects of ignorance.

BlackDoglet Thu 18-Aug-16 18:23:29

Your school should invite you to a parents eve/meet where they'll explain. If they don't, go and ask to see what they cover, teachers will be happy to allay any fears.

But yes, oral sex, all different types of relationships (LGBT), consent, contraception etc will likely be covered.

Imfinehowareyou Thu 18-Aug-16 18:23:40

It's quite usual for the children to watch a film then they have the chance to ask anonymous questions (written and put in a box) to be answered the next day by the teacher. You usually get a permission slip to fill in to say if you want your child to participate and there will be a chance for parents to pre watch the film if they wish.

Haggisfish Thu 18-Aug-16 18:24:07

Ask the school. They will be happy to tell you what is taught, and how.

BusStopBetty Thu 18-Aug-16 18:24:16

Well it is age appropriate. Do you really think they don't already whisper about this stuff in the playground?

amysmummy12345 Thu 18-Aug-16 18:24:17

I can understand reproduction and bodily functions, but oral sex?! confused where does the line get drawn? IMO 10 year olds don't need to know about that just yet...

bloomburger Thu 18-Aug-16 18:24:18

He'll be the butt of the kids jokes when he goes to secondary school and they mention blow jobs and his face goes blank!

JenLindley Thu 18-Aug-16 18:24:41

Don't try to imply I'll think less of him because I love his innocence, thanks.

Who did that? confused

ThatsMyStapler Thu 18-Aug-16 18:25:11

Pretty sure it will be age appropriate as its in his class for his age?!

Better he learns at school than find out from friends or the Internet

I tell my dcs not to google anything and that they can ask me anything and it's not stupid

eyebrowsonfleek Thu 18-Aug-16 18:26:28

My sons a year older than yours and has heard the term "blow job" in the playground.

Teach him yourself if you're concerned about the school not doing it right. I don't understand why people over react and are gutted when their children find out stuff like what a lesbian is. (I know you didn't say that but I know someone in real life)

Children are having free access to the Internet at an earlier age than ever before as their parents don't know/care about shielding their kids. I know plenty of MC mums who believe that their child would never see anything bad online. They need sex ed and the words explained so they can stay safe and make wise choices. I think it's really important as taunts like "gay" and "bitch" are heard and used in the playground away from adult ears. The same with computer games- some are playing GTA and misogynistic games as the parents are dumb enough to think it's only a game or plainly don't care.

BertrandRussell Thu 18-Aug-16 18:26:40

Too many people confuse innocence and ignorance.

Patterkiller Thu 18-Aug-16 18:26:53

But it is age appropriate. Play ground gossip and Chinese whispers are rife in year 6 and beyond. This way they learn the facts. Honestly it's a different world when they get to secondary. It's learnt and forgotten about after a few hours.

hownottofuckup Thu 18-Aug-16 18:27:53

Do they really cover oral sex? That does seem a little unnecessary. Masturbation, contraception, DTD all sounds good to cover but oral sex? It's very enjoyable but I didn't know it was something they covered with 10 and 11 yr olds! Does anyone know why? >>Off to Google...

eyebrowsonfleek Thu 18-Aug-16 18:28:23

They don't explain how to do oral sex!!

JenLindley Thu 18-Aug-16 18:29:11

Too many people confuse innocence and ignorance.


Children are still children and still "innocent" (although the word innocent has no place in this context) when they know the facts about sex. They're even innocent at 16 when they have sex. Because sex isn't a fucking crime!

PartyFants Thu 18-Aug-16 18:29:12

Look, can we all just assume that I love my son and respect and value him whatever he knows/doesn't know, and I wouldn't think he was guilty, sullied, or whatever? Trust me, I'm a normal person, I'm not scared of him finding out, and the lgbt stuff is fine.

I've just bought a couple of books on the subject off amazon to talk ice with him when the question comes up. I just wanted to know what they taught and how explicit it gets. I will ask the school.

JenLindley Thu 18-Aug-16 18:30:41

They have to cover oral sex because they need to know that it has to be done safely!

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