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Year3 boy very "dreamy"

(11 Posts)
Wheneverwhatever Tue 10-Nov-15 22:12:17

My son is in year 3 and he is a summer boy, hence one of the yongest. He has always performed well and last year he had excellent results at the final assessment.
The teacher this year is very strict and "old style" and she told me that she things my son is too dreamy and distracted.He has always preferrend maths to english or reasoning and i have always thought he was a bit behind compared to some ofnhis classmates.
Anyway, today , just at bedtime (to give anguish at night!) he told me that he cant concentrate at school as sometimes his "brain thinks of other things" and he confessed last week he only wrote half page on the stone age.

What can i do to help him? Should i buy the bond books? Any idea will be welcome!

irvine101 Wed 11-Nov-15 09:11:57

My ds is in yr3, and exactly the same. He has always been like this, but same as your ds, he is doing well at school.

He prefers maths to English, and put minimum effort in writing, because most of the time when he have to write, he is actually thinking about something completely different.

Even when he is eating, he forget to eat because his mind is somewhere else.

But if he is doing what he loves, he can concentrate really well for hours.
So I kind of accepted this as his character, as long as he is not distracting other children in class. I have spoken to the teacher about this, and asked them to remind him/ tell him off when appropriate.

Keeptrudging Wed 11-Nov-15 09:23:20

Have a look at ADD signs just in case, it's often missed as it's not 'visible/annoying for teachers' like ADHD is.

Breaking work down into small chunks and using a timer can help, as can seating position in class. Quiet/dreamy children can often be sat further away from the teacher as they can be trusted not to be disturbing others. This gives them lots of opportunity to zone out. Active/chatty children find themselves sitting nearer the teacher, where they get much more attention/teacher will remind them to stay on track.

Just in case, does he seem to be zoning out/losing the place/missing chunks/bewildered, in which case I'd be checking in case he's having absences/petit mal.

irvine101 Wed 11-Nov-15 09:44:20

Keeptrudging, what is "absences/petit mal"?

"Just in case, does he seem to be zoning out/losing the place/missing chunks/bewildered, in which case I'd be checking in case he's having absences/petit mal."

That is what my ds is exactly like. I have always assumed he has some form of ADD/ADHD, but since it wasn't severely affecting him, and GP/teachers doesn't seem to worry about it,so I left it, thinking it's part of his character. Is it something you should worry about?

Keeptrudging Wed 11-Nov-15 09:58:40

It's a form of epilepsy, it's like little 'absences', can be hard to spot as it can just look like daydreaming, but because the child has been 'absent' for sometimes very short spells, they have missed whatever happened during that time. There's not always an obvious physical sign. A former pupil had petit mal and the only (hard to spot) sign was their eyes would move slightly up/to the side (not dramatically).

They have 'lost the place' and then have to find it again, or missed part of an instruction. It's just something else to rule in/out, I didn't put it to worry you. I would also be thinking about glue ear as a possibility when looking at concentration/zoning out issues.

irvine101 Wed 11-Nov-15 10:17:07

Thank you Keeptrudging . It was really good to know. I will keep more close eye on him, when it seems to be happening.

I have always known my ds has something, can't rule it out yet.
He was assessed when he was 2/3, but result was inconclusive.
Since then, in my eye, he isn't "normal", but GP/teachers think it's within normal range, and he doesn't seems to have meltdown at school(he does at home, sometimes), it's impossible to get referred to specialist.
At the moment, he is doing ok at school, so I was inclined to leave it , but I will keep in mind your advice.

Wheneverwhatever, sorry I kind of hijacked your thread!

Wheneverwhatever Wed 11-Nov-15 10:41:40

That is absolutely fine, irvine101.

Very interesting.
No, I do not think he has any petit mal.
My boy likes to chat- he is a follower. Put him next to a distruptive child, he will chat too. Put him next to a calm child, he will perform well. I just think it could be immaturity but I don't know how to help him.

Keeptrudging Wed 11-Nov-15 11:02:02

Sorry Whenever, got confused who I was replying to smile. Sounds like immaturity right enough, I'm not sure they grow out of being chatty (mine didn't). Where he is seated would help, plus using timers to motivate.

Iken Wed 11-Nov-15 11:28:02

My DS is like this. Watching with interest

insan1tyscartching Wed 11-Nov-15 11:31:05

Have his hearing checked because it's easier to zone out if you can't hear acutely what is going on around you.

Keeptrudging Wed 11-Nov-15 13:07:02

Also, in your OP you said he had excellent results in assessments/performed well. Normally when looking at why a child's not motivated, I would look for possible physical issues first: poor hearing/eyesight/pencil control/tired/hungry. Then at where they are sitting - is something/one distracting them e.g. are they in line of sight of computers/corridor/windows, or near a 'bad influence'? Perhaps his new teacher has a very different teaching style/personality from previous ones. Is he finding the work too tricky, or too dry?

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