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DN not focusing at school

(5 Posts)
peppajay Tue 20-Oct-15 18:28:03

My nephew is 8 and has problems focusing at school. He is easily distracted and can be disruptive. He goes to a school with a high proportion of children with special needs and the school employ a play therapist who comes to the school 3 times a week to work with several of the children. He has seen this therapist a couple of times this term and it has been agreed that he doesn't need to be in class 'if is brain isn't wanting to learn' so he now has access to the 'peace place' where he can sit and do lego or some colouring if he wishes. My brother is fuming as he thinks he just needs a bit of disipline and someone beleiving in him and praising him when he does make the right choices. He loves this new found freedom and spends most of the school day in the 'peace room' now with the nurture staff. He is generally good at home as he has boundaries but at his school it is like they are scared to exert any authority in case it upsets the children and we are sure he is now playing up even more so he can play. Lots of families love the wonderful nurturing ethos of the school but is it really the way to be when a school is predominantly there to educate our kids??

Gingernut81 Tue 20-Oct-15 22:49:37

I'm quite amazed by this and it certainly wouldn't be the case in the school I work at. Having taught children with severe special needs they were still expected to follow the curriculum to the best of their abilities. Whilst it sounds like a lovely, caring school i personally don't think they're helping him - as you say it sounds like he has quickly worked out what he needs to do to get out of lessons! Has your DN been assessed as having any actual special needs? If not I'm inclined to agree with his father.

louisejxxx Wed 21-Oct-15 08:18:43

So let me get this straight....He gets to be naughty and doesn't focus and as his "punishment" is that he gets to not do the work and have extra play time to boot? I would definitely be having words with the school!

Buttercup443 Wed 21-Oct-15 17:50:33

My eldest is also easily distracted and chatty and while not being disruptive or naughty she is easily bored. She aces all her tests so it can't be too difficult for her.

We found what worked best for her is being in a small class and being pushed and taken through her paces. She responded very well to that, much more focused, better behaviour at home, excellent test results.

Even if private is not an option for you I think the path of less resistance is a dangerous one IME. I think your dn's parents ought to have a word with the school ASAP. Opting out should not be an option for dn. He needs to be actively kept busy and engaged. I feel the school is being lazy about a good kids and not working hard enough to realize his full potential. He doesn't need to play, he needs to learn how to learn!

peppajay Fri 23-Oct-15 17:57:59

Thanks all. My Bro and SIL had a meeting today saying they weren't happy but the school still think 'play therapy' is the best thing as they feel he cant cope with the classroom environment as he is still dealing with his half sister moving in with them. His sister( my niece and my bro's daughter from his 1st marriage) is 16 and moved in with my brother and SIL over a year ago, the school and the play team think he is feeling pushed out hence why he is misbehaving. We all think he is a clever child realising that the disruptive kids get play sessions and he doesn't so be a bit more naughty and you will- hence why they are going to look at other schools after half term!!!

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