Hey everybody. I've just joined as I was hoping for some advice regarding DS. He started reception this September and he has some character traits that are making it really difficult for him to settle at school.
Generally he's a wonderful, fun, confident and polite little boy, at home that is. But he suffers from a debilitating confidence issue around other people and groups. He has a big issue with clothing, at the start of term we had serious problems with school uniform, as DS didn't want anybody to see him in these new clothes and he begged to be allowed to wear his day to day clothes instead. He makes a lot of fuss even regarding which pants and socks to wear in the morning. Last week he freaked out as his Nan was round quite late and he didnt want her to see him in his pj's. New clothes are a big no no and its a real test of stamina to get him to feel comfortable wearing new stuff. Change seems to really unsettle him and the unknown puts him on edge, he doesnt like to receive gifts or be made centre of attention one little bit.
At school yesterday he was sent to time out (which involves sitting on a large turtle shaped seat thingy) because he didnt want to sing out numbers as a group in class. We were told he just sat there on the turtle and sobbed his little heart out. When we got him home he was in bits because he associates the turtle with the 'naughty children' and now believes he himself is naughty. Because of this he's now scared that anytime he is asked to sing or speak out in a group he will be sent to time out (which equates to being punished in his eyes)
My partner explained this to the teacher who replied by saying "its in the school rules that children need to participate and he needs to understand he is here to learn" This made my partner furious as he understands that and learns well on his own, he is just terrified of making himself heard or seen in front of groups of people. Its so frustrating as he's a really intelligent,eloquent little boy but due to his shyness he's coming across as stand offish and stubborn.
Now we are both really concerned as parents that these school disciplines will destroy what little confidence DS has to the point where his behaviour becomes unmanageable. Does anybody else have similar issues or experiences as any advice would be greatly appreciated.
Thank you in advance
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Primary education
Son struggling with reception class confidence
Chrisandlauren · 16/10/2015 10:13
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