First time school mum(16 Posts)
Hi everyone my daughter is starting primary school in September she's my only child so I have no idea what I'm doing!! We adopted our daughter two years ago so it seems like she's only just come home, but she's absolutely ready for this anyway, I have just ordered her school uniform and my question is really that I have no idea what school shoes to buy her! She has size 8 feet they are very narrow, she has Pierre Robin Syndrome so is smaller than average and will be wearing a 2-3year size uniform. I want something that is comfortable and wears well. Any ideas? Thank you x
I don't know about very narrow feet, but you need to get to a shoe shop with trained fitters if you can. We find start rite wear well.
If you have a good quality shoe shop near you they can give advice. Size 8 shouldn't be a problem. Its small but not that small. My reception starter is only a bit bigger at size 9. She is also starting in age 3-4 clothes.
I tend to buy good quality leather shoes as they wear them for so long and I hope they will lst well - usually the whole school year, or close to it. They are expensive though. 2 pairs of start rites today made me wince. Other friends go for cheaper supermarket or m&s shoes not expecting them to last that long but being quite a bit cheaper so less costly to replace during the school year as needed.
We always go for clarks. I've always used them for all my children and find the quality excellent. For some reason I find the patent ones look newer for longer so try to get these when I can. I have one dd with very wide feet and two with very narrow feet and Clarks do width fittings. One thing I will say about clarks though is that in my experience they measure slightly bigger than their feet actually are. I think they do this so that the shoes fit for longer but my dds struggled with the extra room so I'd always use the assistant's measurement as a guide but I'd always look at the shoe myself and see where the child's toes were and get them to have a good walk around the shop to make sure they weren't slipping off and they were definitely comfy. I found I'd usually end up buying a half size down from what the assistant advised.
Here in Wales kids start nursery the term after they turn 3 so there are plenty of children in aged 2-3 clothing.
My suggestion would be to find an independent shoe shop and try a few different brands.
Hope it all goes well op.
Hi, both my girls have very narrow feet and Clarks have never had anything that fitted them so avoid them now, though you may be lucky. They're both a D/E width. We buy Petasil which is a Portuguese brand and tend to be made quite narrow.
She's catching up then, she's been so tiny for so long she had a tracheostomy from 6 weeks old it was removed 2 months ago and she also has a gastrostomy tube (peg) she's closely monitored for her size because of her diagnosis but it's nice to hear that other children of similar age are similar size
I have had shoes from clarks before and to honest I wasn't that impressed, I don't like her having cheap shoes where I can help it, I bought her some sandals from Next in May and they gave her terrible blisters and fell apart after a few wears.
I feel really flustered about her starting school, everyone else seems so prepared.
We always go to an independent shoe shop as my daughter has big narrow feet. They stock several makes and always have something to fit. It is expensive, last pair was £57!
The advantage was when she started school she could recognise her shoes easily as they were different from everybody else's!
I think starting school is far worse for parents than children, it's a new adventure for them.
DC now teens but we always went to Russel and Bromley as they stock a variety of shoes. My DC were narrow and shallow so it was good to have a thorough fitting.
We are lucky to have an independent children shoe shop in driving distance. They stock not only the usual Clarks/Start-rite but lots of continental brands like Ecco, Ricosta and similar. The staff is very patient and experienced.
DD needs very soft shoes, in Clarks/Start-rite she gets blisters and her feet hurt as they are far too hard.
JohnLewis is also a good source for shoes.
Skinny footed DD1 has always had Ricosta shoes for school. They are expensive but good quality and actually fit her! School is easy once you get in the swing of things, the flustered feeling will soon fade x
Petasil shoes are the only ones that fit my daughter's extremely narrow feet. I find that the European makes fit her feet far better than Clarks and Startrite. I get a lot of my daughter's clothes from Verbaudet as she has the same skinny issues with the rest of her body!!
DD is still a C fitting at 13! You would never think such a slight child could be such a heavy footed monster but she is
Clarks were always too wide after the age of 3 but Startrite have been great and wear very well, they also have an ebay outlet and an outlet shop if you are ever in Norfolk
P.E pumps are the real problem,
we often found supermarket ones to be the slimmest fit as clarks doodles only go down to an E fitting
If you are anywhere near Southampton, try French & Sons. A real old fashioned traditional shoe fitters. My (adopted) DD2 has D/E width fittings and we have found Start Rite work well and also Petasil. (I have found Clarks doodles sandals good for summer as they are Velcro so you can make them as tight as you like)
Now, you don't need to answer the next bit, this is for info. Sorry if you know it all already.
1) As adopted child, your school can get extra funding Pupil premium plus (or it may have recently been renamed) for your child. This should be used as 'additional to their standard offer' mainly to help attainment. You will need to show proof of adoption to them.
2) Some schools cover parts of the EYFS / NC stuff about 'living and growing and changing' by asking for stuff like 'bring in photos of yourself as a baby'. If this will be an issue for you, suggest you mention upfront with the class teacher so it can be avoided.
3) In fact, don't rely on info being passed on from teacher to teacher. I have done a short summary of background, medical, and adoption issues for each class teacher throughout primary. Also highlighting clearly our rules on photos. I also did it for ADD1's tutor at secondary.
4) Think ahead about how 'secret' you want her adoption to be. We didn't keep it a secret, as I turned up clueless with an 8yo ADD1 in y3 so needed to explain why I didn't know basic stuff. I have always assumed that people know ADD2 is adopted too, and I do mention it if relevant. What I don't say is any details. I think most/all of her class are aware and most parents, except maybe those of newer children. I just found it easier to be 'open' with other parents, but I know other adopters think differently.
5) Depending on how articulate your little one is, you may need to help her with answers to questions from new friends about any obvious medical stuff. Mainly though little kids seem to be quite accepting of differences, and take them in their stride. Older kids may 'baby' yours because of her size, DD2 had this, and had to learn to say that she was capable of doing things for herself (or just enjoy all the attention ).
Sorry, a bit long.
I was her healthcare assistant from 7 months Old I worked with her while she was in foster care which is when I decided I wanted to be her forever mummy, because of the circumstances of her adoption I know everything about her birth and I even worked along side her birth parents visiting and met them a few times. I have her life box which has pictures from her stay in hospital (7 months) her foster placement and coming home which we are incredibly lucky to have.
She has a hole in her neck it's about the size of a ten pence piece maybe slightly smaller, she breathes through it as well as her mouth so I'm guessing that's going to open a can of worms with questions at school, she takes it in her stride we are open with her about everything and to be honest she uses it as a "look at me" sometimes lol. She is aware she's adopted and wears that badge proudly, she tells people that she has her forever mummy and daddy and that she has two birthdays (actual and her placement day) which is exciting for her.
We had the same issues with photographs while she was in nursery we attended a sports day, this was prior to our day in court so she was still a looked after child who wasn't able to have her photos taken this was of course to protect her safety, I was standing with a group of parents who expressed how silly a photo ban was and that what stupid parent doesn't want their child's photo taken "I mean it's bloody ridiculous" ignorance is bliss isn't it.
People are genuinely shocked when I tell them she's adopted, she looks so similar to my husband and I, plus I was 24 when I adopted and I look like a child myself
It is a big step for her and for you after all she's been through. Hope it all goes well.
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