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Relative to teach ds next year. Can i get him moved

(16 Posts)
wankerchief Mon 22-Jun-15 22:43:20

Ds is due to start reception in sep. Just got the welcome letter with the name of the teacher and its a cousin of dh's.
She will be new to the school (and teaching) and we didnt know she was going to be teaching there.
Its made me rather anxious. I wonder about talking about ds to the family and what do i do if there a problem and i feel unable to go to her.

Im due to go to the school to hand in forms and try on uniform. Would it be worth asking if he can be moved to the other reception class? With all the places sorted is it likely to cause a fuss?
Really unsure what to do for the best. The school is our catchment and was our fourth choice, no chance on waiting lists to others out highest place is 12th so cant switch schools.

TheRealMaryMillington Mon 22-Jun-15 22:48:05

It would not be unreasonable to ask to change but they may not be able to implement it unless someone leaves the other class. (IMO this is quite likely before September or early into term- someone will go private/move house/change their mind/get a place at a higher choice) I would hope that the teacher would be professional in all things but I think the school would understand your concern.

Email the head. Politely and without hysteria to ask to discuss. Don't ask the office staff casually.

SavoyCabbage Mon 22-Jun-15 22:52:17

Yes, I would email the head too. Just give the information and then leave it to them. Don't infer that it might be inappropriate or anything, not that I am saying you were going to!

We've a few teachers with dc if their own at our school. I found it all,very weird at first, dc going on a play date to the deputy heads house!

wankerchief Mon 22-Jun-15 22:58:19

Ah currently no head at the school, haven't had one for a year and no one found for sep yet.

Also no email, all communication through the office so i shall call un the morning and try to find the relevant person.

Tricky really, relative is not particularly close to us but is to the whole family. Don't want to offend her but would prefer her not to teach him

TheRealMaryMillington Mon 22-Jun-15 23:06:08

GEt in touch with the deputy then, or whoever is running the show.

The office staff should help you to find the right person but don't discuss it with them.

soapboxqueen Mon 22-Jun-15 23:15:06

I think it would be reasonable to ask. There will be somebody in charge somewhere so ask at the office who that is.

Be aware though that the teacher may have already been given the list and will be aware of a cold moves out. The head may not tell her why but she'll know. Not that it should change your decision. Just be aware.

wankerchief Mon 22-Jun-15 23:22:45

Soap that is a concern i did think of.
I really do adore the family but they are very...involved in everything, I'm very aware that she could know and it could go down badly all around.

I'm stumped on what to do. In an ideal world i would get a place at a school we wanted and it would resolve itself but its highly unlikely.
Dh thinks it will be fine as its only reception but I'm still uneasy.
Id hate to cause strife within the family.

Rock and a hard place springs to mind

SavoyCabbage Mon 22-Jun-15 23:28:21

Write a letter to the deputy then and put it in an envelope and hand it in at the office.

Perhaps the cousin has mentioned it already if they know that is the school your ds is going to.

MidniteScribbler Tue 23-Jun-15 04:25:39

It's likely that your relative has only just received her own class list and may not have even realised that it is your child, if the name is not an uncommon one. If she has realised, it's likely that she has already informed the school already to advise of the conflict of interest.

MrsKCastle Tue 23-Jun-15 08:10:45

Definitely worth mentioning. I would think it would be better for all 'concerned if your Ds was moved, not least the cousin herself. As an NQT, she'll have enough to deal with without adding that extra complication. Be aware that it may not be possible though, especially if things like friendship groups have been considered when planning classes.

TeenAndTween Tue 23-Jun-15 08:23:04

Can you clarify what you are concerned about?

Is it relative not keeping classroom information confidential?

Or is it that you would be unable to speak to her as a teacher rather than a family member?

averythinline Tue 23-Jun-15 08:29:49

I would go in person as well as writing a letter - at ds school - luckily she wasn't teaching him but could in theory have been in subsequent years-the head was happy with my position and he's never had her as teacher....she also is aware (our reasons slightly different from yours as estranged family)
So would suggest you find out who is in charge talk to them and give a letter and then when they get a new head do it again....

AuntieStella Tue 23-Jun-15 08:34:26

Yes, I think in these circumstances you should definitely ask.

The simplest solution for the school is to keep the groups of children the same, but swop round the teachers.

BarbarianMum Tue 23-Jun-15 09:02:35

Of course you can ask. But, if successful, you need to talk to her too. Otherwise she's likely to be hugely offended (and quite rightly so as your concern is basically that she will breach confidentiality).

Optimism Tue 23-Jun-15 09:32:03

Are you concerned about the fact that she is a family member or that she is an inexperienced teacher? I know lots of teachers who have taught relatives without any problems.

wankerchief Tue 23-Jun-15 11:20:01

No I'm not concerned about her teaching at all! She is very lovely and ds is very fond of her.

Im worried about the classroom dynamics and being able to speak freely and plainly if there is problems. Im not sure i could go in with problems.

I have an elder son with sn and looking at the chats and meetings ive had about him i think i would stuggle to have the same convos with a relative.

Ive gone in and handed im my forms and had a brief chat with the office lady and am awaing a call back.
All i did was highlight they were related and she said ' ooh ill get someone to call you, not sure if there's rules' so ive not been negative at all, just mentioned that the reative might be unaware aswell

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