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Getting to school

(8 Posts)
feelingploppy Mon 03-Nov-14 12:04:25

I have tried hard to help my daughter's friend and her brother get to school. Their mother often won't take them in, for various multiple reasons. Yesterday, the mother asked me to take the children in to school today; my daughter has a tummy bug and is not going in. She texted me today to say she kept her children at home today as she has slipped a disc.

Tomorrow I have to take my daughter in early to breakfast club (if she is completely better) and we have to go to something straight after school - I can't take her children unless they have £2 to go to breakfast club and then I can't take them home.

I feel responsible for these children but increasingly cross because I feel that she expects me to take them in and then will do nothing to try to find alternatives. Does a school (primary) have any responsibility in actually getting children to school? Should I be suggesting the mother contacts social services if she really cannot take them in?

QuiteQuietly Mon 03-Nov-14 12:40:06

Is the school aware of why the children are not in school today? If you are a Learning Mentor or Home-School liaison person at school, perhaps suggest to the other mum that she contacts them. I don't think schools are responsible for getting children physically to school, but if there is persistent absence because of logistics, they may feel moved to assist in some way to save their attendance figures?

We have been in a similar situation before and it really felt uncomfortable after a while. We stopped after some angry phone calls because my DC had gone to someone elses house after school (while I was working late) and I wasn't able to do a school run just for someone else's DC. I wish I had handled it better, as it still pretty acrimonious (whole class invited to party except DD1 etc. etc.). Good luck!

feelingploppy Mon 03-Nov-14 12:53:00

I doubt the school are aware although I think they realise that I take them and collect them often. I will have to suggest she contacts someone at school although this won't go down well. They are well within SS radar which is why I can't understand her attitude or her lack of awareness about why it is not always possible for me to take in/collect her children. I feel like this mother's own mother or social worker myself and I am cross to admit I don't like this role at all.

Thank you for your reply.

insanityscratching Mon 03-Nov-14 13:01:42

At dd's primary school there were family support workers and they did collect and return children from home/school when parents were having difficulties.It sounds like the mum needs a more support than you are able and willing to provide and so you should speak with the HT and let them access support services for the children.

feelingploppy Mon 03-Nov-14 14:24:44

Thank you insanity and you are right she needs more support than I am willing to provide.

Doublethecuddles Mon 03-Nov-14 15:02:59

How old are the children? Could they not walk to and from school?
But do not feel responsible for the children. Could you tell the mother a few " white lies " about your DD schedule, so she has to get her children to school?

feelingploppy Mon 03-Nov-14 16:05:29

They are 5 and 6 - yes, white lies is the way to go I'm afraid! Thank you for your response.

bearwithspecs Mon 03-Nov-14 20:20:40

I would let the school know. They should have a family support worker or similar

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