Challenging behaviour since starting reception

(17 Posts)
KirjavaTheCat Sat 27-Sep-14 15:00:51

Is anyone else finding their four year old's behaviour challenging since starting school?

DS is constantly grumpy and frustrated. I've been putting it down to tiredness but he's also being very rude and deliberately naughty, which is really out of character for him sad

Just now he had a full-blown tantrum because he broke his clay model into pieces as I was getting the paint ready, and therefore couldn't paint it. This morning he pushed his little sister over because she was 'touching his clothes' and it had made him 'angry'.

All part and parcel of starting school or something to 'nip in the bud' and sort out? He just turned four in July, so I wonder if it's all getting a bit overwhelming for him, though he seems to absolutely LOVE school and his teacher said he's fine during the day, no issues whatsoever.

Any advice?

OP’s posts: |
GoldfishSpy Sat 27-Sep-14 15:03:16

We have just turned five year old twin boys who started reception this term. They love school. I am currently listening to them scream at each other in the garden - they are usually best of friends.

They are exhausted.mand talking to other parents most children are the same when they first start.

Dottymum2 Sat 27-Sep-14 18:38:44

Relieved to hear it not only my four year old that has undergone a personality change!! She has gone from happy go lucky with very few tantrums and outbursts to an emotional, weepy, moody little person, like yours she is seemingly happy at school. Hard not to read to much into it but I guess it's all normal and part of the adjustment period. I am finding the time I have with her in the evenings (which I look forward to all day!!) is usually quite a stressful time, hopefully it will get easier. Roll on half term!!!!

6031769 Sat 27-Sep-14 18:46:28

my ds is the same, and i've read loads of statuses on FB from fellow school mums about kids having melt downs etc etc so think its totally normal

Doodledot Sat 27-Sep-14 19:40:38

Been at a party today where every parent said the same.

GhoulWithADragonTattoo Mon 29-Sep-14 17:00:31

My 4.5 year old DS is very tired (although he denies it obviously) and is having wet accidents both day and night which hasn't done for over 1 year. He is normally a thoughtful and sweet little thing. He seems to be loving school so don't think it's that. I'm pretty sure my DD was exhausted until Xmas when she started school.

iseenodust Mon 29-Sep-14 17:08:29

Give them a duvet day is my tip. Don't tell them that's what it is. 'Oh you look a little pale this morning' or some such. It is a long first term and I remember DS's reception teacher telling me she always knew when the holidays were approaching because there were so many more tears over nothing in class from so many children. They are 4. I really regret not giving DS more slack over attendance in reception.


threepiecesuite Mon 29-Sep-14 17:15:19

Same here, dd 4.5 is on a very short fuse and weepy. Also starring wetting again. She was vomiting on Thurs night and had no sleep so she stayed off Fri and had a day on the sofa which has helped a bit.
A few quiet weekends til half term I think.

Laundryangel Mon 29-Sep-14 20:03:13

I came on to post about this exact issue. DD is almost 5 and is extraordinarily difficult at the moment, particularly with me which I think is simply down to me being the constant (DP works long hours so is rarely home before they go to bed). The weekends haven't been too bad but most afternoons are a real struggle. Tears whenever she is said no to or told to stop doing anything; shouting, stamping her foot &, on one occasion, pushing me; being defiant over everything including silly things like teeth cleaning. She sobbed herself to sleep tonight which I feel really bad about but it has always been the case the just before bed naughtiness leads to no special story with just her (as opposed to with her and DS) but I don't think I have ever had to carry it out. Tonight, I had no choice ... which led to hysterics. Roll on half term!
I can't say I hadn't been warned but DD is old for her year, has been used to long days at nursery and is generally quite happy go lucky so I thought we'd avoid the worst of it. How wrong was I?!

Elisheva Mon 29-Sep-14 21:40:09

I'm so glad to hear that other people are experiencing similar to us. DS has been horrible since he started school!

MaddHatter Tue 30-Sep-14 20:42:14

I think we all get grumpy when we're tired and I think what makes it worse with reception age children is that they don't really understand how tired they are and can't express it very well.

I have heard parents at the school gates talking about taking their reception kids swimming after school, to the park etc. which seems madness to me. I am letting my DD watch TV, play the iPad, play quietly in her room by herself etc and encouraging as much rest and relaxation as possible. And early to bed! Even 6.30 if she's really tired.

Thelovecats Tue 30-Sep-14 20:59:54

I think they try so hard in school that it has to come out at home. There is a lot of emphasis on good behaviour all the time at the start of reception, and it it is very tiring for them to be well behaved all the time grin

GhoulWithADragonTattoo Tue 30-Sep-14 21:24:26

That's a good point about school expecting good behaviour so they keep it together at school and then go crazy at the slightest provocation at home where they can fully relax.

imme Tue 30-Sep-14 22:22:08

Oh yes, terrible behaviour in this house too! DS thinks he is entitled and then gets really naughty. Doesn't listen and getting him ready for bed has turned into a constant battle.
He is used to long days in childcare but I guess school is different as there is much more structure than at nursery and then it's five days a week, from 9 to 3:20 so it's a great part of their life when they have to behave and follow instructions from an adult.

sangfreude Mon 06-Oct-14 05:20:21

Sorry to hear things have been tough op. Absolutely dreadful over here- ds behaviour ghastly at home and school. Duvet days for us I feel this week. Best of luck , hope it gets better soon thanks

Soozee53 Wed 27-Nov-19 14:49:29

Can anyone offer any update on how things progressed. I am in a similar situation.

IceCreamFace Wed 27-Nov-19 16:20:37

So normal. As well as being tired is the stress of the new routine, constant socialising, new expectations and demands on them. They just get over whelmed.

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