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Still no school place-shit!

(42 Posts)
5toocoolforschool Wed 27-Aug-14 15:31:28

Ok so a long story short i took my 2 boys out of reception and yr 1 in feb to home educate them.I decided about a month ago i would like them to go back to school (they would like to go back but also have some reservations) so filled in the form etc.

Anyway,they got back to me today after me sending emails and leaving lots of messages,there are no places at their old school (didn’t expect there to be)nor at the next 2 nearest ones.

I cant drive,dh can but its unwilling to drop them off and pick them up (even though technically he is able to as he owns his own business)im really not sure what im going to do,they said they will let me know which schools have places for all 3,and i can choose from those.What if its too far?What will i do??

I really don’t want to home educate them,its so chaotic and i feel so overwhelmed.I have an 8 month old and a 22 month old,plus the 4,5, and 6 yr old too.Yes i know it was my decision to take them out,and I'm starting to wish i hadn’t,but i need to move forward from this.

hollie84 Wed 27-Aug-14 15:35:08

Why is your DH refusing to take them to school?

I think if the nearest school with a place is over 2 miles away, then the LA will provide transport. That's probably per individual child though, not the nearest school with places for all three.

5toocoolforschool Wed 27-Aug-14 15:38:22

He did used to take them to school in the mornings after i had dd2,but he said he hated it,and tbh he was pressuring me to take them out to home ed,he hates schools and doesn’t want the kids to go.I can see his point in some ways but i cant cope,they would be better off at a school.

hollie84 Wed 27-Aug-14 15:39:38

If he doesn't want them to go to school, maybe he needs to be at home educating them while you go out to work then?

What is he expecting you to do?

5toocoolforschool Wed 27-Aug-14 15:47:14

I think hes hoping they will offer me one too far away and i will just give up and home ed anyway.

I’m trying to think what my options would be.I am learning to drive,have a test booked in November.So its only short term its a problem really.We could move,as we rent,but he would kick up a fuss about that as well really.I would rather they lived near their school.

5toocoolforschool Wed 27-Aug-14 15:49:26

He wouldn’t do that,plus i wouldn’t be able to earn even half of what he does.I do want to be at home with them,school or no school,i just dont think home ed is right in our family,I have no help.No family near on either side.Only a couple of friends (not from round here) The home ed community is OK but most of the other kids and parents are a little strange and not really the kind of people i could form a strong bond with (same with the kids)

TantrumsAndBalloons Wed 27-Aug-14 15:51:24

But, if you are the one that has to home ed, surely the final decision has to lie with you?

AuntieStella Wed 27-Aug-14 15:51:45

IS there a lot of movement in your area? Do you actuall know where you are on the waiting lists for the 3 schools where you think you can manage the school runs?

Because the other option is to stick it out on the waiting lists for those (taking places as they come up, not waiting for a set of 3 at once), and continue to HE the others.

Or hope if it's a distant school, it's over the qualifying distance for transport.

5toocoolforschool Wed 27-Aug-14 15:54:37

It does lie with me,but just with a lot of sulking!

TantrumsAndBalloons Wed 27-Aug-14 15:57:54

Well To Be Honest if he isn't actually doing the home educating he has no reason to sulk.
You, however, have the right to say, I feel unable to home educate at the moment

hollie84 Wed 27-Aug-14 15:59:24

I would say your options are:

HE and wait til a school comes up near enough to you


accept any school place for all of them and then move nearer to that school

LiberalLibertines Wed 27-Aug-14 16:01:24

Riiiiight, so you took 3 kids out of school because?

Sorry op, but Jesus H,

Pp are right in saying anything further than 2 miles you're entitled to transport, but you won't get in touch in time for this school year, so you'll just have to apply like mad and sort it out when they go back.

Sounds utterly chaotic.

LiberalLibertines Wed 27-Aug-14 16:02:02

Tantrums ! Haven't seen you for ages smile

TantrumsAndBalloons Wed 27-Aug-14 16:05:39

Hiya lib

I've been pretending to be busy and important at work. I'm bored of it now grin

icymaiden Wed 27-Aug-14 16:08:37

whose idea was it to home ed? You or your DH's?

Pinkje Wed 27-Aug-14 16:08:39

I think you need to stand up for yourself. Moving near the school will have benefits for your children socially and you too. I understand your life must be chaotic, I grew up in a 5 kids household.

Was that your decision (large family I mean)?

3asAbird Wed 27-Aug-14 16:33:03

I would remain on waitlist and try and make home ed more structured with routine and less you follow any curriculums or schedules? whats local home ed groups like? maybe ask on home ed board here?

Im home educating my 5yearold due no school place and I have a plan.

also have 3.5year old at home 2 days week when hes not at preschool.

DeWee Wed 27-Aug-14 22:53:57

Once you get one into school then the others should go to the top of the waiting list.
Could you ask the council for a list of schools that have spaces for any of your dc, then choose the one you think works best. You then HE the other two until places come up.

5toocoolforschool Thu 28-Aug-14 13:08:28

They got back in touch yesterday and said they will send me a list of all the schools within 3 miles that have places for all 3,they don’t go back til Thursday so its possible they will start then,just depends on when i find out,she said hopefully by tomorrow but possible Tuesday at the latest,then it will be a mad dash to get uniforms etc.

Was wondering if childminders do pick ups and drop off’s only?And how much it would cost?

Yes it was my idea to have this many kids lol to be honest i enjoy it but i just feel like ive taken on too much with the home ed too.Dh was saying i shouldn’t of had so many kids if i just wanted to send them to school,i didn’t really know what to say!Most people send their kids to school,i literally don’t know how to reply to that one.He is being a dick atm.

tiggytape Thu 28-Aug-14 14:23:08

If they can only offer schools over 2 miles away, the council are obliged to fund transport for the children (but not for you). However the council is not obliged to place them all in the same school so if they can dot them around at closer schools, they may offer that. If you insist on wanting them all in the same school (which would obvioulsy be easier) they may not fund your transport as it would be your choice to hold out for a school that can take all 3 even though it is further away.

Many childminders do school runs but you would have to get the child to the childminder in the morning and collect from her in the evening. This may be tricky unless you can find someone within walking distance from your home who childminds and travels to a school a few miles away. Most childminders cover the schools nearest to them but it is worth checking. Another alternative is after and before school clubs if this would make it easier for your DH to drop off and pick up and better times.

OneLittleToddleTerror Fri 29-Aug-14 07:17:05

Not sure where you are, near here childminders are £4 an hour. But they usually pick up and drop off at the nearest school. So you would still need to be able to get to where they live.

addictedtosugar Fri 29-Aug-14 07:53:52

How would the kids take it if you took ONE place, which is likely to then have the other kids at the top of the wait list - so if there is a space for any of the kids at a school you can walk to, take it, and home ed the others til there is a space opened up?

You might need to think about school size / movement in the area to get 3 spaces fairly quickly?

Good Luck!

ToffeeWhirl Fri 29-Aug-14 08:19:52

I'm also home educating whilst I wait for a school place to come up, but I have two older children (8 and 14), so life is much calmer. With that number of young children, you need help. Have you thought of contacting Home-Start? They might be able to provide someone to help with the older children while you deal with the youngest. Another possibility is to contact a local college where they do child-care courses and see if any students want child-care experience. A friend of mine with three young children did this and it helped her through a difficult patch. She couldn't go out and leave the student alone with the children, but it gave her an extra pair of hands.

The other option, if you have the money, is to send the older ones to a childminder for some time during the day so that you have time to deal with the younger ones.

Fairenuff Fri 29-Aug-14 13:09:24

Your husband is causing all your problems here OP. He wants children but doesn't want them to go to school. Wants you to HE but you can't. Wants someone else to sort out their education but won't move.

You have allowed him to get you into a right mess, must be so unsettling for your children not knowing if they will be going to school in a few days or not.

I would say give your dh the choice, either he does the school run or you move house. If you fail to give your children the education they are entitled to, you will soon be in trouble with authorities so you need to decide pretty quick, school or HE to the required standard.

amyhamster Fri 29-Aug-14 13:14:36

take the places 2 miles away

tell him you'll do the school run with him if he drives

in November pass your test and buy a second car

if he refuses to do that I'd be seriously considering relate

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