Talk

DS3's teacher came and told me she was really impressed with a character description he had written about Goldilocks. She particularly pointed out his use of brackets and other punctuation.
He is in year 2 and has recently turned 7. Writing is something he loves and tries really hard at, this is alien to me as the rest of the family are way more maths and science oriented.

I would appreciate some opinions on it, thanks - not really bothered by levels but would be interested what you think.

I believe this was an independent piece of work following a class discussion.

(paragraphs, punctuation and spelling as he wrote them, his writing is fairly neat, easily legible and some bits are joined.)

Goldilocks is prety because she has golden ringlets a ruby red dress and some shiny, red shoes that gleam in the sunlite. She also has BIG Brown eyes and always carrys a basscet around to colect fire wood.

Goldilocks’s curiosaty got the better of her because she couldn't resist it so she had to go in. (If I were Goldilocks I would come back later and see if they were back.) She’s is greedy because she ate ALL of Baby baer’s porige.

One of her favarot things are walking in the woods, looking down rabbit holes and peeking under pebles. When she went into the woods she said “I wonte get my little red shoes dirty mummy!” and when she was at the Bear’s house she said “Oooooo! I wonder what the porige tastes like?”

When Goldilocks fell off the chair I think she felt embarassed. Arfter she had got home arfter the stressfull chase with the three bears her heart was beeting 19 to the dozen!