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school referral to social service, possible actions?

(51 Posts)
greg999 Fri 21-Feb-14 13:03:35


I would like to get advice of posible actions (my and scchool and social services), and would like to know your opinion about school doing regarding my son B.

My story:

I have received letter from social services:

Children’s Social Services received a referral from Head Teacher
of ... Primary School on the 12 February 2014 with concerns that B’s
development is being compromised by Ms S. behaviour.
After assessing the information and reviewing the chronological events from the referral
that have been happening for B over the last year or so, the school staff have been
the backbone in supporting that B’s needs are being met appropriately, they too
stepped in when S. needed support. However recent events have occurred which has
resulted in S.’s disengagement and has poor relationships with the school. S. will not allow SALT to share targets and information with the school which means the school cannot build upon the work that he is doing there despite the host of interventions B. is still not showing progress.
I have advised head teacher recommending that she refer this matter to Common
Assessment Framework ‘CAF’ for a Team around the Child Meeting, it does not quite
meet our threshold for an assessment but indeed should be assessed at a community
This framework is intended to be used as a holistic assessment of need to support multi-
agency working. lt’s a four step process which allows practitioners to assess needs,
identify service delivery plans and check that the needs are being addressed as part of a
structured framework.
it is appropriate for B that you work with the school at a CAF level without social
services involvement, however in the event that you do not engage with the CAF
intervention our services will accept the referral and take further action.
END of the letter.

1. We are happy to allow SaLT to share targets and information with the school however on recent meeting S. said that she not like that school representative been personally present at meetings regarding B's Speech and Language Therapist.

2. We are not agree with statement that we or S. is disengagement with school as we attend all meetings and all parent evenings and we are following any reasonable suggestions school has to offer.

3. I can not understant how school can write that our son B. is still not showing progress? Despite all his hard work, all home work done, and going to writing club 3 days a week !

4. How school can write "the school staff have been the backbone in supporting that B’s needs are being met appropriately"?

I thought that I and my wife had been and still doing everything what we can to full fill B's needs. It is worrying me that school is calling themselves that they are backbone regarding to my sons needs!

5. Background: My wife S. used to work as a Teaching asistant in that school for about 1 year, after she get ill diagnosed with mild depresion, she have been off for about 2 - 3 months. She start taking medication, feel beter, she wanted come back to school, school was suportive, help her at begining, after couple months situation change, School start complain about her, she has overreacted couple times, after that she start decreasing dose of medication till she stopped taking medication, at about that time school start dismissal process, which finally finish in November last year.

I am not complainning about dismissal process, This was dispute beatween my wife and School, but I think you should know about that. My wife did not want me be involved in that process.

6. I am not sure how and if I should argue with school about statements about my wife and my son.

7. I dont know if i Should explain the isues to social services ,

We write to them short letter that we will cooperate within Common Assessment Framework and we are very happy to welcome social services at our doorstep.

Any suggestion will be appreciated


lljkk Fri 21-Feb-14 13:34:52

How old is your son?
Why doesn't your wife want school reps present during the SLT consultation meetings that she is also at?
There may be too much identifying info in your post, think if you want MNHQ to delete some parts.

NigellasDealer Fri 21-Feb-14 13:40:26

Greg I get the impression from your post that you might have English as a Second Language, although of course your English is excellent. Does that mean that your son and wife are also dealing with learning a new language/system? Could there have been misunderstandings?
<Might your wife need an interpreter? has this been provided?
Your sending them a letter saying you are happy to co-operate is a very good idea.

bishbashboosh Fri 21-Feb-14 14:07:07

Have you and your wife had a meeting with school before or after this letter? I agree your English is great but it seems like you need some support, not necessarily from social services.

greg999 Fri 21-Feb-14 14:20:17

My son is 7 years old.
I think my wife doesn't want school rep present because of her previous dispute with school, which she did not accept outcome of that dispute. She want independent opinion without influence of school.
I don't know what MNHQ stand for, but if is kind of moderator then yes I agree to delete some not important parts, I just wanted to show whole picture.

Yes, English is my Second Language, same to my wife, son was born in England.

I had been too on the last meeting in school where we talk about that mater, and she state clear that she is happy to share with them outcomes and even she hand over to them some information from previous SLT meeting, just she don't want them be present.
Situation is sticky, because school meeting was with her previous manager at work.

Thank you for reply.

lljkk Fri 21-Feb-14 14:22:08

Can you not go to the meetings instead of your wife, then there wouldn't be so many personal tensions in the room?

NigellasDealer Fri 21-Feb-14 14:25:08

sounds like a complicated situation Greg.
However you have done the right thing by inviting social services to visit you - if you 'co-operate' they are happy.
Also going together to the meetings is good, you are presenting a united front.
Is your wife's English as good as yours?

greg999 Fri 21-Feb-14 14:25:19

Meeting at school was 2 weeks before that letter.

NigellasDealer Fri 21-Feb-14 14:38:32

could be some cultural or linguistic misunderstandings going on as well as stereotyping IME. or possibly someone has a personal problem with your wife, or maybe they have genuine concerns, i do not know of course.
(I think your probably come from the same country as my exH)
Anyway you are doing the right thing, going to meetings and discussing and welcoming ss to visit.
so try not to worry too much.

NigellasDealer Fri 21-Feb-14 14:42:56

unfortunately for your wife you cannot have these meetings without the school present.
the only thing you could do was maintain ss contact and move school which might not be your son's 'best interests'

greg999 Fri 21-Feb-14 14:43:03

My wife's spoken/verbal English is quite good, however her writing skills and understanding written words is not as good (in my opinion poor).

I think interpreter was needed in her dismissal process (again in my opinion) but she didn't want listen to anyone opinion.

What is your opinion about the words that "the school staff have been the backbone in supporting that B’s needs are being met appropriately" ?

NearTheWindmill Fri 21-Feb-14 14:50:44

Do you think you all, including your son, need a fresh start at a different school where there is no employment history between school and your wife. Could you get social services on side to help arrange that?

I think you need to be straightforward and honest about this and you need to attend meetings with your wife. Can you get an advocate from your community to attend with you - just guessing here but someone like an imam.

NigellasDealer Fri 21-Feb-14 14:53:06

not sure what that means greg.
as long as your son is arriving on time, has a good attendance, is well fed and has clean clothes, then i do not see what more you and your wife can do to 'meet his needs'?
hopefully someone else can come along soon and advise you, perhaps a primary school teacher

NigellasDealer Fri 21-Feb-14 14:53:55

he does not need an imam windmill lol

NearTheWindmill Fri 21-Feb-14 15:01:00

I was trying to be constructive - no offence intended. Many apologies.

WTFlike Fri 21-Feb-14 15:03:55

Don't apologise Windmill, it was a good suggestion.

greg999 Fri 21-Feb-14 15:05:59

Thank you for suggestion an advice I am not feel offended at all.
Imam is not my faith at all.

NearTheWindmill Fri 21-Feb-14 15:08:20

It was merely a suggestion that you and your wife find an advocate to help you at these meetings - just an example. When I was a school governor and we had exclusion meetings parents often brought them along - often a pentecostalist minister I seem to recall. They helped to keep the meetings measured and were very helpful for the families concerned.

SidandAndyssextoy Fri 21-Feb-14 15:13:21

When they talk about making progress, they will mean all sorts of things. Progress in speech, which is obviously an issue, and academic progress which will be shown by the levels at which your son is working. You go to parents' evening so these should have been discussed with you. Do you remember any concerns being raised about the academic progress he's making?

vjg13 Fri 21-Feb-14 15:22:25

I think it is a really good suggestion to have a third party present at any meetings. We had a poor relationship with my daughter's old HT and even having a fairly useless parent partnership representative present at all reviews really helped put everyone on their best behaviour.

greg999 Fri 21-Feb-14 15:23:46

My son is arriving on time (apart from few times in 3 years), has a good attendance, is well fed and has clean clothes.
That way I am bit worrying with that situation.
* For me if school using words like that about being backbone to my sons needs, is very close to tell that we should not look after my son.*
Ss did not agree with them this time and advice school to refer this mater to CAF instead.
What I'm trying to say, that to me, it look like school got something in mind, and probably is going to do some more actions like that in future.
Maybe I'am going to far with it. I Hope so. ;)

Uptheanty Fri 21-Feb-14 15:33:03

I would also be concerned with the "backbone" comment. It is a good sign that SS do not agree.

Do the social workers know of past employment issues between you wife a& the school?

Does your son require extra support at school or has he encountered any issues that have concerned the school?

Owllady Fri 21-Feb-14 15:41:57

They should not use words like backbone anyway, it's really unprofessional. Do you think they mean with respect to him learning English?
I would not worry with respect to social services either, they will try to get a straightforward outcome.

MrsKent Fri 21-Feb-14 15:52:44

You sound like a sensible and caring father. I am sure if you just convey to social services that you are willing to cooperate, that there may have been some tensions with the school because of your wife's involvement as a t. A. And I agree maybe bring a third party to meetings with school things will just follow the usual process. It is good to have all agencies that may be able to help in a child's development involved. Don't be scared.

greg999 Fri 21-Feb-14 15:54:57

Yes, there was/are concerns about his academic progress, starting from year 1, but reasons was put in his lack of English, and there was always words that he is doing fine and with time he will build up his vocabulary which he is doing.
On all parents evenings there was not any strong concerns, they been prise him for his hard work, there was words that his level of English stopping him to be in level with others children, but not to worry he will catchup at later stages like other children with English as second language.
In year 3 he start going to writing club 3 times a week before school to help him with calligraphy and spelling, plus somebody is helping him with reading. Thank you for school for that, we reading with him almost everyday too at home.

I could understand they concerns if they write he is doing slow progress, but to write he is doing no progress is just bad will, and even more full fill my worries that school choose to pursuit some opinion.
That way I'am writing on this forum to find different point of view.

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