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Considering moving school, WWYD?

(5 Posts)
Sunshinebetty Fri 07-Feb-14 09:37:22

Hi, this is my first post and I'm so sorry that I am jumping in with a question but I am at my wit send today and could just cry....

We moved to a new area last year, found a nice house in a nice village, sale was going through, rang the village school to arrange for kids to attend to be told they had no spaces and couldn't accept them. Nearest other school is a car drive away but all there was, it's a tiny school <50 pupils who had spaces. We couldn't pull out on the house without losing a load of cash so decided to lump it. So now kids go to a school in a different village. Dropped them off this morning and eldest DS was just standing there, he said he no friends, there are only 5 kids in his year and 3 are girls who he doesn't get on with. He broke my heart. Youngest DS is all settled in and loves it.

Our village school (which is 500m from our house and we have to drive past it every morning which makes me so sad) has much better numbers although still well below national class sizes. Our street is much quiter than I thought it would be and there are no other kids for him to play with here although the village does have a good number of kids, but I can't see how he can get to meet them. So I am seriously considering enquiring about moving them to the village school again, it's a ridiculous situation where he can't make friends with kids in the village and can't develop relationships outside of school because all the kids there are so far away.

But then DS2 loves his class and has a great time at school, although he is the sort of kid who would be able to move. I just don't know if I can put DS1 through three school moves in such a short period of time. Any advice? I am pretty upset that he he literally has NO friends, especially as he is such a chatty sociable boy. He goes to extracurricular stuff at the weekends but those kids are scattered all over the county.


offblackeggshell Fri 07-Feb-14 09:39:20

I'd try to move them if you can. There will be a waiting list though, and you might find you get a place for one DC before the other.

Seeline Fri 07-Feb-14 09:42:11

There must be activities that go on where he could meet other kids - beavers/cubs (depending on age), football/rugby/cricket etc. I'd ask round, check local notice boards etc and see what is going on.

PastSellByDate Fri 07-Feb-14 10:43:32

Hi Sunshinebetty:

First off schools now maintain wait lists - so the first thing you should do is inform the school you would like to place your child on the wait list.

Second - if the present school has only 1 other boy - that friendship can be maintained out of school through play dates or possibly having your child go to an out of school activity (beavers, swimming, etc...) at the same place as the other boy.

I realise as a parent you want him to have a wide circle of friends - but I can assure you (and I'm in a huge city) the friendship thing in primary is complicated. Some parents work, so play dates are tricky to organise, some parents spend lots of time at church groups/ cultural groups so their children's weekends are fully booked, etc... Our solution has been to get our children involved in clubs and that has lead to many of their friendships and given them time with children of a similar age. More importantly, it's meant that they have friends outside of school - which is helpful because as we know (well with girls at least) there are phases where all is lovely and then phases where someone goes on the turn.


brettgirl2 Fri 07-Feb-14 12:12:12

I would put them onto the waiting list, although not sure how it works trying to get two in as places may not come up at the same time

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