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Help bad teacher

(41 Posts)
jellybeans001 Tue 04-Feb-14 17:07:27

Hi need some help my son is 5 years old and is in reception. His teacher I'm not soo happy about he called my son stupid for kissing him and my son yesterday took his teachers ginger bread man home and ate it without me knowing it was the teachers and said to me that what he did was stealing. I feel this teacher has gone over the top abit and should not be behavouring this way. How should I deal with him

LIZS Tue 04-Feb-14 17:13:11

your ds or the teacher ? Did you witness him being called stupid ? Presumably your ds knew the biscuit wasn't his , so that is stealing isn't it ? He needs to know that is unacceptable. Suggest you arrange to speak to teacher and explain how negative comments make your ds feel .

jellybeans001 Tue 04-Feb-14 17:14:51

My child kissed the teacher and he said your being stupid for kissing me

usernameunknown Tue 04-Feb-14 17:16:54

Did he say "you're being stupid" or more "that was a silly thing to do"? Were you there when it happened?

As for the gingerbread man, how did your son end up with it? DID he steal it?

jellybeans001 Tue 04-Feb-14 17:17:19

Yes he took the biscuit and I have spoken to him about it but I felt he should not be tallking to my son like that

jellybeans001 Tue 04-Feb-14 17:18:23

No my son told me about his teacher saying he was stupid for kissing him

IHaveSeenMyHat Tue 04-Feb-14 17:19:08

He did steal the biscuit though.

What language would you have preferred the teacher to have used?

jellybeans001 Tue 04-Feb-14 17:20:00

He just seems so young to be told that what he did was stealing he just started last september

Oakmaiden Tue 04-Feb-14 17:20:36

How would you like him to speak to your son? What would you say to a child who took something belonging to someone else and ate it?

Incidentally - were you actually there on either occasion that the teacher spoke to your son, or has your son told you?

Oakmaiden Tue 04-Feb-14 17:21:36

When do you think it is the right time to teach a child that taking something that is not theirs is stealing?

jellybeans001 Tue 04-Feb-14 17:21:46

Well anything but that hit a nerve with me as I didn't like that

DrankSangriaInThePark Tue 04-Feb-14 17:24:13

What exactly did the teacher say to you?

jellybeans001 Tue 04-Feb-14 17:24:59

He told me the teacher said that to him. I have spoken to my son and have told him what he did was wrong and that he should never do that. Can see that the teacher was right as you all seem to agree with him

pollypocket31 Tue 04-Feb-14 17:26:41

He stole. End of story. Never too young to learn right from wrong in my opinion (and I'm a reception teacher).

Oakmaiden Tue 04-Feb-14 17:29:11

It is hard to know if the teacher is right, as such, because we weren't there and don't know what was said exactly. Or how it was said. And with respect, neither do you.

However I would expect a teacher who was kissed by a child to be extremely discouraging to that child. They absolutely have to be - it can be a minefield for teachers, say particularly male ones.

And I would also expect a teacher to explain to a 5 year old that taking something that was not theirs is stealing

I would expect both to be done kindly, but firmly. And there is no evidence that that isn't exactly what happened.

jellybeans001 Tue 04-Feb-14 17:29:53

Drank he told me my son had taken the ginger bread man and had put.it in his bag and he then said that it was stealing. I offered to replace the biscuit and said sorry but felt that it was wrong saying a child still in the early years was stealing. Oh I don't know maybe I'm wrong then

Oakmaiden Tue 04-Feb-14 17:30:42

"Sadly", not "say"

jellybeans001 Tue 04-Feb-14 17:31:42

Yes it's a male teacher

Oakmaiden Tue 04-Feb-14 17:32:27

I would also be concerned about a parent who felt the finer points of property ownership didn't apply to their precious five year old

DrankSangriaInThePark Tue 04-Feb-14 17:32:49

So the teacher hasn't spoken to you?

How did you find out the biscuit was the teacher's?

Your son told you?

I think you're getting (well, your son is) a bit of a hard time here, your son is only 5 and I'm sure there was no malicious intent in nabbing the teacher's biscuit, or in being affectionate with him.

That he was grumpy because of his stolen biscuit and doesn't want 5 yr olds kissing him doesn't make him a bad teacher though. smile

If it's bothering you, I'd go in for a chat and explain the biscuit incident, son knows it's wrong bla bla bla and see what the teacher says. It might not have gone exactly the way your son has told you. (dd is 10 and if I were to believe how she tells of her teacher telling them off you'd think the woman was lining them up and horsewhipping them, whilst shrieking and threatening violence at the same time- she isn't. Of course. )

DrankSangriaInThePark Tue 04-Feb-14 17:33:41

Sorry, cross posted!

jellybeans001 Tue 04-Feb-14 17:35:09

Thanks everyone opened my eyes abit as to not take it bad. Thanks

BiscuitMillionaire Tue 04-Feb-14 17:35:23

Any post with 'bad teacher' in the title is going to get all the teachers piling in and defending their own. Good luck.

DrankSangriaInThePark Tue 04-Feb-14 17:36:10

I'm a teacher.

PlasmaBall Tue 04-Feb-14 17:36:58

I would absolutely expect my 5yo to be told off for stealing if he to and ate something that wasn't his. How else was teacher supposed to deal with it? What if the biscuit had belonged to another child? How would you feel if another child stole his biscuit. Of course it was stealing and needed to be dealt with as such. 5yo is plenty old enough to understand that.

As for the kissing, of coursexteacher had to pt a stop to it. You had no way of knowing what was actually said

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