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Moving schools again.

(4 Posts)
hiddenhome Thu 03-Oct-13 14:04:09


Ds2 is nine this month and in Year 4.

We moved him to this current school in Year 1 because of discipline problems with some of the other boys in his class (casual violence and teacher not able to control them). Ds wasn't learning anything and seemed to just watch videos and do colouring in. When we visited the school to take him out one day, the place was in chaos with several teaching assistants struggling to cope with the kids. There was also some kind of toilet riot going on as well.

He isn't fitting in with his current class. Ds is quiet, studious, a bit geeky, not sporty, likes music and studying. The other boys in his class are just into football. They seem to be hitting him quite a bit, pinching him, hiding his stuff, calling him names and generally causing him problems. They seem very silly and immature and can't settle down in class. We've put him onto packed lunch now as there was too much trouble in the lunch queue.

Last Friday he was hit in the face and his glasses were broken sad Again, lots of name calling. The kids at this school seem very unpleasant. He has two friends in upper years, but nobody at all in his class. I don't know who I'm going to invite to his birthday party at the end of the month sad

I've phoned another school today (in a more diverse area) and am hoping that it might be positive tomorrow when we go and see it.

I feel so fed up as ds loves learning and wants to make friends and do well.

The school itself is good, but the kids in his class are pretty awful.

BeerTricksPotter Thu 03-Oct-13 14:20:08

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

tiggytape Thu 03-Oct-13 22:00:27

It does sound particularly bad but I guess you also have consider if the grass is really greener elsewhere.
Football obsessed classes are the norm in Year 4 (I had a DS who was the only one who hated football at that age. He still does but at his secondary school so do loads of other boys - there's a lot to be said for big schools with lots of friends to choose from).

Violence and bullying is not acceptable anywhere but your haven't said how much you have taken to the school and how proactive they have been. Have you got to the stage of logging incidents, writing to the Head, writing to the Governors? What does the school say they will do to prevent these incidents?
Bullying is wrong and unacceptable but it happens in every school and any school that tells you different is either lying or does not see it which is worse. What matters is that the staff nip it in the bud and treat it very seriously. A new school won't guarantee no bullying but it might be better at addressing it than your current one assuming you have gone through all the correct channels of raising it and asking them to sort it out.

hiddenhome Fri 04-Oct-13 12:56:10

Thanks tiggytape. His current school seem to just put things down to ds2 being 'sensitive' hmm He is to a certain extent, but he can also stick up for himself too. He knows he shouldn't hit back and doesn't want to tell the teacher because he'll be seen as a 'grass' sad

He told us this morning that the other children in his group won't allow him to join in with a group activity and tell him that he's "not allowed" (whatever that means). I asked him why the teacher wasn't supervising, but he just said that he didn't know and that she didn't see what was going on. There's pinching, hitting, snatching his work from him and peer rejection going on towards him.

It's the constant low level unfriendliness and rejection that bothers me. They tell him that he speaks differently and that he's horrible. The hitting and glasses incident were just the last straw.

He did have a difficult year last year because his teacher took a dislike to him and would openly criticise him in front of the class (about his handwriting mainly) and I think the other kids have picked up on this negativity. The teacher was very negative and unpleasant and we just stuck that year out thinking it would improve, but the unfriendliness seems to have rubbed off onto the children now. I would say there was a culture of unpleasantness and negativity which was being cultivated all last year.

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