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The school is constantly mithering me for money

(160 Posts)
colditz Tue 21-May-13 00:42:22

Money for shitty ineffective swimming lessons that, in 6 years, have not taught my son to even float. Money for mandatory trips a a factory, or a cricket field. Money for dressing up charity events. I am sick of them asking me for money and then pressuring my children when I can't pay!

Where do I stand legally with this? Do I have to keep paying for everything they are asking me to pay for?

ReadytoOrderSir Fri 24-May-13 21:52:20

The school that my DCs attend are buggers for sending out demands for £3 for this visiting author, £4 for that drum workshop, £1 for the charity day, please send cakes for the sale, etc ... all with f-all notice.

The school where I teach has a list in the newsletter of all the planned things for the next term, with estimated prices, so there are no shocks. One major trip per year for each year group. One mufti day per term max.

Mine are going on a fabulous historical day that will involve a coach, entry and costumes. It is well worth it. We've had a nightmare paring down the cost and tried hard to get it down to £20, but just could not get a coach for the price, even with PTA subsidy.

musicalfamily Fri 24-May-13 21:55:45

Ours is probably one of the worst ones, supporting a large number of charity and any business/money making initiative going, it's a constant stream of things!

I have now a deal with the (older) children that if it is a charity they really want to support or the latest frame/craft/DVD/peg/doll/bun they want to buy, then they can use their own pocket money. After all it is nothing to do with education but the same as going to buy something from a stall/store.

They are perfectly happy with this approach. School trips/books/anything educational or even PTA fundraising I am happy to fund, but buy-a-bracelet/necklace/fill this tub with coins for charity x and all the rest that we get all the time, then it's the kids' choice.

We do support our own charities and do a lot for the community so it's not the case of being stingy, I just refuse to get told which charity I should support via my children and doing so in such a way that I feel morally obliged to do so - frankly I think it should be banned.

Fairyliz Fri 24-May-13 22:36:31

Op if you are on Income Support surely you can apply for free school meals? If you get free meals the school will also get pupil premium. At the school where I work some of this money goes into a hardship fund to pay for the families who are struggling.
I would go and have a word with the office.

colditz Sat 25-May-13 13:01:07

We already have free school meals, and the school know this. There is a high proportion of children with fsm in our school. Maybe this is why the mither for money so much, maybe a lot of parents can't afford to pay so just don't.

MrsFruitcake Sat 25-May-13 14:12:16

DD's school have a £30 'voluntary' donation system which is payable at the start of the school term in September. It isn't really voluntary after all, as if you don't get the money to them in the first 2 weeks or so, they send letters home asking if there's a reason why you can't pay it which is very wrong IMHO and worse than asking for it in the first place.

She's been to Marwell Zoo this year so far and that's it. hmm

ggirl Sat 25-May-13 14:20:52

I love the word mithering

seeker Sat 25-May-13 15:02:11

My mil tells the children off for "mithering" her!

Our builder told me that his son goes on a skiing trip next February to Canada with an additional night in NYC before. It costs £1140. I was like blush

JulesJules Sat 25-May-13 18:53:03

We had an email from school recently which said

Can all parents who have not yet paid the voluntary contribution for xxx please do so as soon as possible


IneedAsockamnesty Sat 25-May-13 23:41:37


At the top of the page is your inbox can you please check it,doing so will save you about £14 per week.

A few years ago I offered a local school free use of a company bus and driver ( all correct LA required checks as its a school bus that does LA runs) for swimming lessons and school trips on the condition that they stopped charging parents for trips to free places weirdly they refused as they wished to use a different company who charged loads.

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