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Need reassurance about school - its not all bad, is it?!

(154 Posts)
mamalost Thu 24-Jan-13 23:01:46

I was planning on HE-ing DD for at least reception (she is due to start in Sept) but it is not going to work out at the moment. In the last few months I have spent A. LOT. of time reading about home educating etc and I really believe in it even though we can't practically make it happen at the moment... I have sent in an application for reception and now am feeling like a massive failure and like I am going to damage my children by sending them to school. Please - tell me its not all horrible children on the playground, nasty teachers, strict rules and pointless lining up? I am so worried about DD starting school, I feel ill just thinking about it and its months away. sad

shelley72 Mon 28-Jan-13 17:43:24

havent read all of the posts, but just wanted to reassure you OP that no, all schools are not that bad. a year ago, i felt the same way as you, and even up until the night before DS started school i didnt want him to go and felt sick to the stomach at the thought and would have chopped my right arm off if it meant he didnt have to go!

we had of course visited on our own, visited with him, left him for an induction morning. i was worried that he wouldnt make friends, that all of his thirst for knowledge would be knocked out of him, that teachers wouldnt have time to answer his sometimes daft questions, that it just wouldnt 'fit' him. we were offered our third choice school which made it so much the worse for my fears. i have a friend who HE and i think some of her thoughts about school i had taken on board myself. i took him on that first day, telling DH that we would give it until christmas and then i would HE if things werent working out.

however, i really needn't have worried. he settled in so well. he has made friends (didnt know anyone on first day) and has a great time playing with his friends. from what i see the class is made up of 'nice' children, the teachers are lovely and his yR teacher especially clearly loves her job and her class. he is doing well, and somewhere between all the playing and dressing up has learnt to read, confidently write a little, add and subtract. nothing exceptional you understand but he has made me so proud. he loves school and was a bit difficult at home for the first few weekends when he realised sat and sun were non-school days! he does have a reading book and occasional bits of homework but we do this and we still have time to do after school / weekend activities meet up with friends etc.

i think maybe if you visit and get a feel for the school yourself it might help ease your worries a little? reception classes are loud, be warned. but it was the loud chaotic atmosphere - ie children dressed up playing monsters that really attracted us. the children were learning (without realising it) and were happy.

shelley72 Mon 28-Jan-13 17:47:44

just to add, DD will shortly be 3 and we are thinking about pre school for her - she is at home with me full time and whilst (mostly) i love it, i know that i want to keep her with me for ME and that isnt necessarily what is best for her. she is getting to be very independent and needs her own friends to mix with and to prepare for school i guess. feel very guilty for even thinking of sending her when i am at home sad.

sneeders Mon 28-Jan-13 21:30:24

Mt children loved Reception, and it should be great fun with lots of play opportunities, and especially lots of social activities, and if there are problems, usually teachers who are experienced are great at talking through your concerns. I think one advantage of school over HE is that your children get a chance to learn from a perspective that is different from your own. But be reassured, you are your childs most important educator for a long time, even when they are in school. You are not doing anything wrong to your child enrolling them in school and they may even have the best time ever. Talk to the Headteacher and explain that you are feeling anxious and they may let you come and observe some time in Reception or simply explain their approach to reassure you.

sneeders Mon 28-Jan-13 21:31:22

Be kind to yourself

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