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Wise mn'ers what's your take on this?

(20 Posts)
mrsshears Tue 11-Oct-11 12:59:53

My dd has recently started y1 and is not particulairly enjoying it,for various reasons including low tolerence of the other children,over exciteabilities(very sensitive senses) and the fact she doesnt like the work.
DD is a very bright child and a complex character(we are currently awaiting a full private assessment)dd's teacher recently told me that dd was having difficulties with numeracy which i would say is one of her weaker points but by no means a weak point as such,i would say average.
DD has basically been saying she doesnt understand any of the numeracy work(i do not believe this to be true) and yesterday wrote a whole page of sums out wrong that she knew about 18mths ago,including 5+3=10!!!!i cant for the life of me understand why dd is doing this??
I have spoken to dd and cant really get a straight answer other than she doesnt like school and in the meantime her new teacher has the impression that dd has a serious numeracy problem! help!

AnotherJaffaCake Tue 11-Oct-11 14:22:32

I would suggest doing some work with her at home. Not necessarily maths worksheets, if that's what is stressing your DD out, but perhaps you could get some maths-based games to play eg Snakes and Ladders, or have a look at the Orchard Toys range - we've got Pop to the Shops. These sort of games make maths fun, and encourage confidence in working with numbers. Alternatively, you could consider a subscription to a website such as Education City, or Mathletics or Maths Whizz so she could do some maths work at home.

If I were you I'd ask the teacher to recommend some workbooks or textbooks you could slowly work through at home as well, just to give your DD more confidence when she's in class.

blackeyedsusan Tue 11-Oct-11 14:43:41

a) she is tired after starting the new regime of year 1 having to do more focussed work.

b) she doesn't like maths because she has to work at it and literacy stuff comes easy

c) she would rather be playing and can't be bothered to engage her brain

d) she is just being awkward (why do they do that?)

it is not long til half term so maybe leave it til then and see what the results of the assessment are. when do you get the results?

would probably try and sneak some maths in the back door by playing dice games with 2 dice or doing stuff on the computer.

mrsshears Tue 11-Oct-11 15:47:44

Thank you both,

susan all your points have gone through my mind and i think it is a combination of all 4 of them.
I'm hoping we will get the results there and then and the full report at a later date,the whole numeracy thing is really bothering me because i know dd can do it.I have just asked her about it on the way home from school and about the maths paper and she said "well they could have been the answers" which tells me she couldnt be bothered and thought she would just take a guessangry

exoticfruits Tue 11-Oct-11 16:29:06

Why not use this site here and play some interactive games for fun, you could work out her level of understanding without being formal.

mrsshears Tue 11-Oct-11 17:25:42

hhmm listen to this...
dd has just admitted to me that she isnt trying as its not interesting
so I said to dd "santa will be looking out soon to see if you are trying your very best and being well behaved and you know what you will get if youre not(bag of coal in our house)"
dd replied "oh coal,something that has been under the ground for hundreds of years,well at least that would be interesting!"angryangry!!

chickensaregreen Tue 11-Oct-11 18:51:09

Did you tell the teacher that she has no problems with maths at home? Then the teacher can know to push her rather than assuming that she is struggling because she can't do it.

WoodBetweenTheWorlds Tue 11-Oct-11 19:56:41

She sounds like she is bored and switched off. Is the work too easy?

DownbytheRiverside Tue 11-Oct-11 20:03:23

Is she used to working with more adult involvement?
The way that EY works is often an adult with a target group, and the rest playing or doing something like a game or fun activity. They often move from a smaller class to a larger one, our Y1 have gone from 22 to 30 and less TA time, less play and more focused and formal tasks.
Even very able children sometimes struggle with the independence required to work without adult encouragement and interaction if they've been used to it.

mrsshears Tue 11-Oct-11 20:03:54

I have but i dont think she believes me,i'm going to send in some of dd's maths work she has done at home.
I think half of the problem is dd is high ability in lots of things but numeracy isnt one of them,dd is in the words of simon cowell 'distinctly average' where numeracy is concerned and has to actually think about it and also doesnt find it at all interesting.
She is really not doing herself any favours and i can see why the teacher would think she had a problem.

solittletime Tue 11-Oct-11 20:04:59

Sounds like my daughter in the future! As a teacher and mum I'd say she is being akward on purpose. I would actually forget about the numeracy for about a week, don't mention it, look like you don't care (same principal used for picky eaters when trying new food), maybe speak to the teacher about it being a bit early to tell whether a child is having 'problems' with numeracy, I would not want to pigeon-hole a child so early in the term. The more you fuss about it the more akward she will become about it. If she's as bright as she sounds (and she does) it won't take long for her to catch up with whatever the topic of the week was when you start focusing (discreetely) on numeracy again next week. Probably mention this approach to the teacher if you plan to give it a go!

DownbytheRiverside Tue 11-Oct-11 20:06:13

If she is very able in some areas, that can also mean that she's reluctant to try in an area that she finds more challenging.

solittletime Tue 11-Oct-11 20:08:19

Mh, also sounds like she's so used to being good at everything else that not getting it so easily scares her, maybe causing a bit of anxiety. So I would definitely go with the 'no big deal' approach first before starting to kick up a fuss and coming up with plan b.

mrsshears Tue 11-Oct-11 20:13:04

Thanks everyone,its really helpful to hear everyones take on it.
solittletime this is one of my worries,the teacher will have dd down as someone who needs help and then she will get even easier work and things will get worse!

ScareyFairenuff Tue 11-Oct-11 21:44:58

I agree with solittle in terms of downplaying it. Is your dd getting lots of attention from not doing her work, with you questioning her every day or sitting down to do extra numeracy work with her at home? Just an idea. I think you should not mention it to her at all but just spend time doing fun things (not necessarily educational) that she enjoys.

Some children are little perfectionists. If they are not 100% certain that they can do it, some would rather not try at all. You may subconciously be reinforcing this idea by concentrating on her getting her numeracy right, rather than having a good try. Find opportunities to let her know it's ok to get things wrong, to make mistakes. For her and everyone else. Praise her efforts rather than the results.

the teacher will have dd down as someone who needs help and then she will get even easier work and things will get worse!

If the teacher thinks she needs help, then she probably does. She may not have needed help in the past but right now she does. If she needs easier work to consolidate what she can do already then so be it. Things will not get worse, they will get better. This is not a race. She is not up against other children competing for the top slot. She needs to learn at her own pace and many children plateau before moving on to learn new things. The teacher should be able to ensure that she is given tasks to suit her ability and challenge her. Numeracy is not all about adding numbers. There are lots of practical activities which should hold her interest.

I would trust the teacher's judgement for now, give your dd some 'breathing space' at home and see how she is in a couple of weeks time.

iggly2 Tue 11-Oct-11 21:50:18

Down play it. She will soon get board. At some stage she needs to learn to work for herself, if she gets praise and enjoys other areas will she not want the same in numeracy?

iggly2 Tue 11-Oct-11 21:50:29


iggly2 Tue 11-Oct-11 21:52:42

In what ways has she "low tolerence of the other children"?

mrsshears Wed 12-Oct-11 06:15:37

Thanks everyone,i'm not going to mention it to dd again and will see what happens over the next few weeks,dh has suggested this too.

iggly dd doesnt like lots of noise made by other children and gets upset by their behaviour sometimes,she also doesnt get "normal" 5yr old behavior and will ask why other children behave as they do,particulairly when they play chase games etc "whats the point",i think its basically what motivates her and other children is different,she struggles with all the you cant play/i'm not your friend rubbish that girls are good at and really finds it hard to understand why anyone would want to be nasty to anyone else,she understands the motivation i.e jelousy etc but gets very frustrated by it all,dd will openly say she preffers to be on her own,i think its less stressful for her.

bebanjo Wed 12-Oct-11 09:14:41

Sounds to me like she would do well at home, she is not interested in the maths they do at school and why should she be?
I would let her follow her own interests, she will work out that she needs some math to function and will learn it then.

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