DW has been a stay at home Mum with our 4 & 2 year old. Our eldest started school last week and DW misses him, and feels like its a step back to be looking after the 2 year old with all the tantrums / high maintenance etc. Any thoughts on these feelings? I know the youngest is getting more 'fun' as the weeks go by but is there anything I could do now to help, or is it just a wait and see type situation
I have a 4 & 2 year old too. It's so much quieter without the oldest one! Our 2yo misses her as well, as usually they entertain each other really well. Now, even though the younger one has more 1:1 attention, there are times that she looks a little 'lost'. I find that her behaviour is better, and she has less tantrums, but on the other hand, the onus is more on me to keep her entertained. Before, they'd just go off and play together - my problem is I can't play with her in the way a 4yo can, and keep it up for hours! Perhaps that is what your DW means by 'step back' - it's like going back to the days before youngest's arrival. So it's a little more lonely and everyone has some adjusting to do.
However, I think it's something we'll all get used to soon enough, once we get into a new routine. For me, I'm looking at joining a music class with the 2yo, and doing more 'fun' stuff that we couldn't do before, due to having the both of them with me, on their non-nursery days. Like taking her swimming would be no problem now either - couldn't do it before on a ratio of 1:2. For me, I think I need to sort out set things to do so - as I'm the sort that needs a bit of structure.
It's only for a short while - in another few weeks it'll be half term!