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Starting a year early??

(60 Posts)
treetrunkthighs Fri 17-Jun-11 11:31:20

I hadn't even considered this but a friend of my MIL works at the Infant School that DD2 will hopefully be starting at in September 2012. She is October born, so would be one of the oldest.

This friend of MIL has called her this morning to say that the school would take DD2 this September shock if we wanted to.

My heart says no, but I need to give it some thought I suppose.

Anyone done this?

MrsJamesMartin Fri 17-Jun-11 11:38:31

She would be going into reception at age three? I don't actually think this is possible tbh and the school don't ring parents to offer places, an application has to be made via the LEA and a school place is allocated.

Sept 2012 applications would be in by December this year. Does she mean they would take her into the nursery?

moogalicious Fri 17-Jun-11 11:38:36

she would be starting school at 3?

IndigoBell Fri 17-Jun-11 11:40:31

Is this a state school or an indep?

Do they mean go to nursery or reception?

treetrunkthighs Fri 17-Jun-11 11:48:06

Reception. It sounds like madness doesn't it?


Yes she would be three, turning four in October.

Saying that she knows a lot of the children who are starting this year and you wouldn't know that she isn't their year group when you watch them together. Everyone I speak to think she's starting this year.

IndigoBell Fri 17-Jun-11 11:49:10

The decision is easy-peasy. Don't do it.

titchy Fri 17-Jun-11 12:03:15

Assuming you're in England you, your MIL or the friend are misinformed. She may have a place to start nursery, and some of that nursery time may be with reception class, but she will not be able to start reception at 3! The LEA won't allow it for a start.

Chek with the Head and the LEA if you want to be sure. Don't rely ont he grapevine, even if that grapevine works there!

Sukie1971 Fri 17-Jun-11 12:06:44

Keep her home for another year. She will be in full time education until the age of 18 and 8 months as it is. There is a good reason why children don't start school until the sept after their 4th birthday. They're not emotionally ready before then.

treetrunkthighs Fri 17-Jun-11 12:10:13

I would love to "keep her home", unfortunately I work and she is in private nursery.

The school doesn't have a nursery.

I think some wires may be crossed and the friend thinks DD2 is older than she is.

missnevermind Fri 17-Jun-11 12:10:52

And anyway, they wouldn't be phoning MIL all contact would be through legal guardian / parent!

Scholes34 Fri 17-Jun-11 12:11:07

Get her into a proper state nursery.

savoycabbage Fri 17-Jun-11 12:14:50

Where I live you can choose to send your child early or late and it seems to lead to endless problems. My friend sent her son early as he was bright as a button at 4 but is now struggling at age 7. As some people have held their children back and some started them early there is a huge spread of ages in the class.

Also, when your dd is s teenager she will always be friends with people a whole year older than her.

treetrunkthighs Fri 17-Jun-11 12:21:04

They haven't phoned MIL, her friend has spoken to her, off the record.

I can't put her in a 'proper state nursery' as I work and the nursery hours don't fit.

savoy - a very interesting point about her potentially being a year younger than her friends would be when she's a teenager...thank you.

TheOriginalFAB Fri 17-Jun-11 12:32:22

This can't be right. And I wouldn't have her start early.

treetrunkthighs Fri 17-Jun-11 12:44:40

I don't think it can be right either tbh.

However, we are seeing MIL tonight, DH has bought into the idea already and I need to sort out my viewpoint.

I don't think I'd have her start early either but I need to pinpoint why not so I can make my argument. DH has as much say as I do, but he has the bonus of his mother behind him. I am a lone voice.

So her being emotionally ready is one reason why not. What are the signs that she is emotionally ready? That's what they'll ask me.

Her friends could potentially be a whole year older than her, which may become even more noticeable as she reaches teen years.

What else?

LawrieMarlow Fri 17-Jun-11 12:44:56

I really don't believe that is right. I would call the LEA to find out what their policy is on children starting school early.

I wouldn't do it anyway, even if it were possible.

LawrieMarlow Fri 17-Jun-11 12:47:11

I would call the LEA before tonight and see what they say before worrying about it any more.

treetrunkthighs Fri 17-Jun-11 12:52:05

I'll do that Lawrie, thanks

ceebeegeebies Fri 17-Jun-11 12:56:26

From a completely different angle, am I right to assume that your DD attends a private nursery (you said the hours of a state nursery don't fit)? In which case, presumably they are open 52 weeks a year, from 7.30ish till 6pm every day??

Trust me (from someone whose DC attended private nursery) that it is so much more complicated when they start school as the hours are so much less, they get 13+ weeks holiday etc which is a nightmare to organise if you both work why start that earlier than necessary grin?

grumpypants Fri 17-Jun-11 12:59:05

Is it a foundation stage unit attached to a school? in which case last year of nursery and Year R together, which might be why there is confusion?

TheBride Fri 17-Jun-11 13:03:40

It also means she potentially ends up going to University before she's legally an adult which can be an issue in respect of loans etc (of course, she could take a year out but then you'd have to question the benefit of putting her into school a year early if she'd just going to tread water later.)

cazzybabs Fri 17-Jun-11 13:05:55

As the mother of an angust baby and an october baby AND an early years teacher ... far better to be older in the year...most oxbridge graduates are Sept-Dec

Camerondiazepam Fri 17-Jun-11 13:06:07

Ceebeegeebies makes a v valid point!
You also need to think about secondary admission - do you want her going to secondary aged 10, and will the LEA allow it anyway?
My DDs are both summer birthdays and I would far sooner they be the oldest in their year than the youngest, gives them such a head start. I don't understand really why parents would want to chuck that away, especially if it will also logistically make your life so much more difficult. What's the advantage to her going early? I don't see one, for her or you.

Camerondiazepam Fri 17-Jun-11 13:07:03

X-post with cazzybabs

fuzzpigFriday Fri 17-Jun-11 13:07:14

WTF? I don't understand, surely there is no way this one particular person can 'get DD in' to the school, and if she was, it'd be rather immoral? Regardless of the age issue, it is never acceptable to make promises of 'getting a child in' at a state school. The system does not work that way. Has your MIL been telling all and sundry that your DD is a genius or something (which she may well be of course!) and therefore needs to be more stimulated? Or maybe your MIL has just misunderstood?

I'm glad you don't agree anyway... Why does your DH like the sound of it? Tell him education (and childhood as a whole) is not a race, it's a beautiful journey and shouldn't be rushed. If you can't enjoy the view, there's no point.

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