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(11 Posts)
PoppetUK Mon 10-Jan-11 10:06:41

Hi there,

I just need someone to tell me it's ok after a conversation with a mum at the weekend.

I've got a year 2 child and she may get 2b's or 2a's which I thought would be pretty good considering my what DD has been exposed to already and I wasn't quite on the ball due to illnesses in the past 18 months.

Do these kids that can read novels by 5/6 and can write wonderfully well continue this trend. Should I push for DD to catch up. I feel had she had a better start (phonics being a big one, lots of writing practise etc) she would have been further on than she is. To be honest I have taken a bit of a look at my parenting and decided I want to have more fun with the kids (the things we enjoy doing together) than look back and regret their childhood.

I suppose I'm just having a bit of a wobble (fighting for it to make some sense and fit comfortably with what I want going forward) and need someone to give me a reality check as it was made to sound like so many of the kids were working at a level 3 level already and those that weren't we never going to catch up which surely can't be the case.

My kids love school. I'd love to ask the teacher again if she's doing ok because we only got to speak to her when she had been back in the country for 5 weeks. 4 months on I want to know she's still going in the right direction. I also want to check she's fitting in ok socially because she was very shy to start with.

Ok my PFB waffle is over.

I'm so crap at holding on to what we do well as a family but I think if I go down the route of pushing too much at home the balance is going to be all wrong. I know with some other things that I can pass onto my kids I can see when it's right to hang back and when to encourage a little more but I'm not sure with the school things.

Thanks for any replies.

crazygracieuk Mon 10-Jan-11 10:28:01

I disagree with the teacher.

Ds1 was a 1c at the end of Y1 for reading and maths but had all level 3s at the end of Y2. He was a 3c at the end of Y3, 4a at the end of Y4 and he is now in Y5 and working at level 5. If you charted his progress on a graph it would like a flight of stairs with big leaps and small plateaus.

Dd couldn't read before starting Reception at 4y5m but learned all the Reception and Ks1 key words in a month, started reading chapter books from mid-Y1 and was working at level 3b at the end of Y2. She is in Y3 now and still considered 3b. If her progress was charted, it would be really steep to begin with but evening out now.

I have a younger ds but he's only Reception and I have no clue how he will progress. My experience of being a mum has told me that if you want them to learn new skills, wait until they are ready or keen because they will learn it really quickly. If you push things when they are not ready then the battles are draining and they won't enjoy or learn it properly.

2b and 2a is excellent and is no indication of how she might do at GCSE or A Level.

As she gets older, you want her to remember her childhood as fun and happy not doing homework.

crazygracieuk Mon 10-Jan-11 10:28:37

I disagree with the teacher.

Ds1 was a 1c at the end of Y1 for reading and maths but had all level 3s at the end of Y2. He was a 3c at the end of Y3, 4a at the end of Y4 and he is now in Y5 and working at level 5. If you charted his progress on a graph it would like a flight of stairs with big leaps and small plateaus.

Dd couldn't read before starting Reception at 4y5m but learned all the Reception and Ks1 key words in a month, started reading chapter books from mid-Y1 and was working at level 3b at the end of Y2. She is in Y3 now and still considered 3b. If her progress was charted, it would be really steep to begin with but evening out now.

I have a younger ds but he's only Reception and I have no clue how he will progress. My experience of being a mum has told me that if you want them to learn new skills, wait until they are ready or keen because they will learn it really quickly. If you push things when they are not ready then the battles are draining and they won't enjoy or learn it properly.

2b and 2a is excellent and is no indication of how she might do at GCSE or A Level.

As she gets older, you want her to remember her childhood as fun and happy not doing homework.

cluttermountain Mon 10-Jan-11 11:11:41

Careful what parents you talk to! My ds bright enough and I know reading fine, writing less fine etc from what I ascertain from the teacher and what I can see. Not sure what number level he is on but my God some parents are obsessed. He is in year 1 and at present I'm more concerned about his ants in his pants, lively demeanour than hot housing him. I'm made aware by 'certain' parents what their little treasures levels are despite me never asking. Also the nosey buggers ask me what reading level etc ds is on. I am sure as time goes on I will switch from behaviour issues to academic ones. I am aware that where a child fits in age wise in a year makes a big difference early on at school re achievement and behaviour. I understand things do even out with most children over time. Try not to get sucked into competitive crap. Easier said than done I know!!!

PixieOnaLeaf Mon 10-Jan-11 11:21:07

Message withdrawn

PoppetUK Mon 10-Jan-11 11:39:00

thank you. I need to hear some sensible advice because I can easily get "sucked" in and worry if i am being a good enough mum and making the right decisions.

Thank you crazygracieuk. I guess this is the sort of thing I was hoping to hear.

If only I had a crystal ball.

I think I probably need to have a look at my underlying issues. I really do worry if I am doing a good enough job and have very little confidence. Put me in a classroom to work with children or anywhere else and I'm confident but as for looking objectively with my own it all goes out of the window.

Thanks again.

PixieOnaLeaf Mon 10-Jan-11 11:42:12

Message withdrawn

cluttermountain Mon 10-Jan-11 11:45:49

Have a cup of tea or coffee PoppetUK and relax! I'm a fine one to talk though. My son is PFB and because everything is 'new' it is easy to get worried by what other parents say and other children seeming to write essays/read novels at 5/6 etc...I know...had panicked moments myself! Concern of moment is keeping my little darling off 'the sad board'...ho hum...

PoppetUK Mon 10-Jan-11 11:59:04

Kettle on as we speak ;)

lovecheese Mon 10-Jan-11 12:56:23

Agree with the others. I share things on MN that I would never dream of saying in RL, and it never ceases to amaze me how bloody nosey - as cluttermountain says - other mums can be in RL.

I am aware of time marching on and my little ones getting older and more independant, and I have come to realise that spending quality time together is so important - sure, get the school work done and keep reading to your children, but don't forget to have fun.

coppertop Mon 10-Jan-11 12:58:30

Level 2s in Yr2 are fine.

I disagree that children can never catch up. My experience has been that progress tends to come in spurts rather than at a steady pace.

My ds1 spent a lot of Yr1 being assessed on the P-scales for literacy (ie he wasn't even at a Level 1). He's now in Yr6 and predicted a level 5 for literacy in SATs.

Your children enjoy school and are also having fun as a family. To me that's far more important than whether they are at level 2 or level 3.

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