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Telling Children to Shut Up

(32 Posts)
MaudOHara Tue 21-Sep-10 13:33:36

Is it ok?

We don't say it at home - unless I'm really loosing it, but NQT in Y2/3 class has been saying it and it just doesn't sit right with me.

One of DDs friends mentioned it and DD confirmed that the teacher says it regularly and is a bit "shouty" and bangs the desk.

Don't know whether I'm being a bit PFB

ConnorTraceptive Tue 21-Sep-10 13:35:47

No that doesn't sit right with me either. There are plenty of firm ways to say "be quiet" without saying shut up.

I have said it to my dc's and I always cringe afterwards because it does sound awful and they will certainly start to copy.

LindyHemming Tue 21-Sep-10 13:36:45

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

belledechocolatefluffybunny Tue 21-Sep-10 13:36:53

Ds would really, really hate that sad It's not right IMO.

belledechocolatefluffybunny Tue 21-Sep-10 13:37:46

Ds used to have a headmaster that would tell him to 'shut up'. I moved him to a different school.

seeker Tue 21-Sep-10 13:38:10

We don't use shut up and i wouldn't want a teacher to use it on a regular basis. But I would be a bit careful about challenging her about it unless you are absolutely sure it's not your child that's driving her to it.........!

FranSanDisco Tue 21-Sep-10 13:38:11

I have said it to my own when losing the plot but wouldn't expect a professional to do this really. Poor NQT must be feeling the pressure I expect, no excuse though.

littlemisslost Tue 21-Sep-10 13:39:34

perhaps theyre just trying to assert some authority as a NQT and maybe a friendly word with HT for some 'support' would be good ? depends on the context really, a shouty, desk banging shut up implies they are struggling?

c0rns1lk Tue 21-Sep-10 13:41:06

No not good at all.

BeerTricksPotter Tue 21-Sep-10 13:44:41

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MollieO Tue 21-Sep-10 13:50:23

Ds's year 1 teacher told ds to 'zip it'. Not a NQ one either. Have to say if I had to have ds in a classroom all day I'd probably say the same. smile

Eglu Tue 21-Sep-10 13:52:33

Not acceptable at all for a teacher to use that language to a class. Prents may say ti in the heat of the moment. A teacher should find better ways of disciplining.

Egg Tue 21-Sep-10 13:53:11

I do say it to my own DC (even though I made a rule with myself I never would, I can't stop myself sometimes when they scream all day...). However if I ever do accidentally say it, DS1 gets v upset and says "that's not very nice mummy" so then I feel bad.

Would not expect a teacher to say it. Although am sure most of them think it regularly!!!!

LindyHemming Tue 21-Sep-10 14:10:20

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

DreamTeamGirl Tue 21-Sep-10 14:29:01

I dont as a rule use it, but there are occasions... Its either that or completely lose the plot!!!!

Not good from a teacher tho sad

strawberrycake Tue 21-Sep-10 14:51:58

I have used in twice in class over the years, but that child REALLY need to hear it! Sorry if you disagree but it did him good to hear something other than 'ok precious..'

Generally though, no it's awful to use in class. I used it when well and truely at the end of my wick, also in a high school.

getabloodygrip Tue 21-Sep-10 14:56:37

It is generally wrong.

For a NQT it is unbelievably wrong, surely a disciplinary offence?

MadAboutQuavers Tue 21-Sep-10 14:57:53

Not good at all with little ones

It implies a lack of control and sounds abusive in a primary school environment

littlebylittle Tue 21-Sep-10 14:59:41

wrong!! acceptable for parent to say it in time of extreme stress and feel sorry afterwards. Very unprofessional for teacher and shows lack of respect for pupils.

Feenie Tue 21-Sep-10 15:03:02

No, of course it isn't a disciplinary offence! It isn't v polite though - I have only ever used it as a very last resort to underline how rude a child is being, if I've already asked them politely to be quiet more than once. And I would reiterate that it's a rude way to ask someone to be quiet.

Algebra18MinusPiEquals16 Tue 21-Sep-10 15:04:25

unacceptable IMO.

littlebylittle Tue 21-Sep-10 15:07:44

I would mention it to the teacher in the first instance, if you decide to take action - he/she is an NQT in first few weeks and to give your child best experience they need to be given chance to teach. If not better pretty much immediately then ask to speak to line manager who may not necessarily be head, could be mentor. Best to help teachers improve, esp this early on.

PixieOnaLeaf Tue 21-Sep-10 15:07:54

Message withdrawn

roadkillbunny Tue 21-Sep-10 16:04:08

Euphemia, due to my Scottish Grandmother I have always used wheesht, with my children now it's ;will you wheesht that noise!'
I have used 'shut up' a couple of times and apologised after and told dd (and ds now he his 2.5 years) that it is not a nice way to say it and 'please be quiet' is much nicer if you need to say anything at all, to my great shame dd went through a phase of telling the dog to 'shut up' have managed to change that now, I would not be very happy with dd hearing it from a teacher, kind of contradicts what I am teacher her at home.
It does sound like she may be having a hard few weeks settling in, the first half term for any NQT can be quite hard, maybe have a chat with her say something like 'X told me to 'shut up' yesterday, can't think where he is getting it from, if he says it in class could you correct him please' or something along those lines, might make her think, she might not realise what she is saying and why it isn't appropriate other then that I would be tempted to wait a few weeks and see if things settle down.
(sorry if I have crossed posts with anyone, started before the school run and finished on return blush )

MaudOHara Tue 21-Sep-10 16:39:11

Thanks for all the replies - its good to know that I am not being PFB (well PSB) in my reaction.

Am pretty sure its not DD thats causing it grin she's a cheeky madam at home but good as gold and terrified of being told off by Miss B at school.

Now that I know I'm not unusual in my response I may have a discreet word - it does sound like she is loosing control and having been a parent helper for many years at the school, I do know that there are a few challenging boys in that class [said as parent of very challenging boy]

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