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What do you let your 12 yr old do?(11 Posts)
Hi, My eldest will be 12 in December I'm just curious what do you let your child at this age do or have for that matter?
Can you explain your question a little?
Walks to and from school. Can go to the next village with friends. Is alone after school until I get home from work. Spends some occasional days at home in the holidays on his own whilst I work. I'd be happy for him to take the bus but he hasn't wanted/needed to yet.
In terms of restrictions... he has limited console time. He can earn more by helping with the house. If he helps with dinner, for example. That's a win-win as it's teaching him to cook, is less work for me to do, and he gets his Xbox time. He has to be home by dark. His phone times out at 8.30 on school nights.
Walk to and from school
takes the bus or two to two hobbies if DH is working away, i pick up
is alone at home after school and the odd day in the holidays
spends time with friends alone in town shopping or meeting at Costa
can use the microwave to do porridge or mug cakes. We still work on oven and kettle
Electronics are used with restrictions like parental control and WhatsApp is checked by us on a regular basis. All has to be handed in at bedtime, nothing is allowed upstairs during the night.
Walks to and from school (a mile away). Is allowed to take the train to his grandparents, 3 stops away (they pick him up though)
Stays on his own one evening a week while I go to class (3 hours)
Makes me tea , makes his own breakfast. And goes to the shops if needed/if he wants something.
Can go visit friends on his own, or to the park with friends (so long as he takes his phone and has it switched on!)
I don't limit screen time, never have, he is sensible enough to self-police, although the two rules are 1)if I ask him to do something he is expected to do it and 2) he is only allowed his tablet in bed on special occasions (rare). I don't have TVs in the bedroom anyway and he doesn't use his phone much yet.
What a vague question. I will try and give you some info that may help.
He goes to school on the bus by himself (with friends usually)
He goes on the bus to visit friends
He walks to the town centre to meet friends
On weekends and holidays he will sometimes be out all day from 9am until about 9pm (I know a lot of people will think this is inappropriate but it has never been a problem for us and he has his phone so we can keep in regular contact)
I send him to the local shops to buy bread etc if needed
He walks the dog by himself although he usually drags his younger brother out with him.
He stays home alone when I take his younger brother to his evening activities
He stays home alone sometimes in the holidays but I am home for about 2:30 so its not all day.
In terms of things he has restrictions on he isnt allowed his phone in his room overnight. On school nights he is bed lights off by 9:30,. The PC and Xbox are in communal areas and shared with everyone in the household. He jsnt allowed to put a password on his phone that I dont know. He isnt allowed friends in the house if I am not in.
If you mean in terms of independence then he plays out here and the next village, goes to the shops, goes into town with friends, is home alone before and after school therefore responsible for locking up and not missing the school bus. If he has after school activity he walks into town and gets the service bus. That sort of thing. He can also cook (ish, his 10 year old sister cooks much better but she is interested and he isn't), use the washing machine, hoover etc. He has a phone which has parental controls and which locks on a night.
Walks to and from bus for school.
Own house key - occasionally home from school before me.
Home alone in school hols.
Goes into town with his friends - we either drop off or he walks with a friend, not allowed to walk alone.
Him and his friends often club together and hire the astro turf pitch at our local sports centre.
Can make himself toast or waffles in a toaster bag and sandwiches.
Not allowed out after dark.
No phone in bedroom after bedtime.
Phone only has message, call and very locked down google access. iPad less restricted but things like YouTube are monitored by me.
No games console on a school night.
No tv in his bedroom but it does have Netflix via the Xbox which he is allowed to stay up to watch til 12 at weekends, but restricted content and I monitor what he's been watching.
Mine older but at 12 would have
Cooked a family dinner at weekends- shopping for it and washing up afterwards
Done their fair share of housework including laundry and hoovering
Done jobs for their grandmother
Make their own way to school - 10 minutes from home
My dd is 12 and is much more independent that ds was at the same age.
She walks to and from school with friends/her brother.
Stays in the house either with her 14 year old brother or sometimes alone.
Is not left alone of with her brother at night.
Walks to friends houses alone.
Goes into local town with friends.
Catches bus/train into nearest city with friends for shopping/cinema.
Can make hot drinks and simple meals like sandwiches, beans on toast, cheesy pasta etc.
Is expected to do chores around the house in exchange for pocket money.
Has no restrictions on phone/iPad other than it goes off at night and I check everything on it regularly.
Goes to bed 9.30 on a school night, later at weekends.