is this an unhealthy relationship?

[typoqueen]

DD is 11 and has been friends with Child A for 3 years now at school, child A has always been a bit stroppy, a drama queen and hates any achievements my DD has done, screaming at her that she hates her for doing so well even when DD got 100% attendance. Yesterday i emptied out DD's back pack and found 8 "love letters" from child A, declaring her undying love and could not live without her, wanting to marry her, stating she is a lesbian and hopes DD is as well!!... As yet i do not know if DD has replied to any of these letters all i know is DD is getting sick and tired of her constant demands and put downs, now the question is ..
1 should i speak to DD about letters
2 do i say something to school
3 should i speak to child A's mum
4 leave it be and let DD sort it out herself.

[helpmum2003]

I would do 1 and 2.

Are they going to same High School?

Your dd needs to know this is not noreal behaviour and she shouldn't feel obliged to respond or even play with the girl.

Hopefully you can steer her to other friends over the summer?

[helpmum2003]

Sorry not normal behaviour

[blackbirdbluebottle]

Do 1 2 and 3, it's not normal behaviour and hopefully school holidays will help

[TheVanguardSix]

1 & 2

Are they in year 6? If so, secondary could bring about the 'clean break' your DD so needs.

[JiltedJohnsJulie]

Another vote for doing one and two. Never ever speak to the parents, it never ends well

DD may not realise that this isn’t normal behaviour so I wouldn’t let her deal with it alone.

If they are going to High School, I’d ask for them to be separated. It really won’t be healthy for her having someone around who doesn’t like to see her succeed.

[typoqueen]

Thank you everyone, was not sure if i was being over sensitive/protective. yes they are going to the same senior school but i had already asked for them to be split up and they are, i will have a talk with DD over the weekend as she is on 2 transition days today and friday and dont want to spoil her excitement, i have told them both (last week) that there will be no sleepovers during the holidays so that they have time apart (we live out of town so dont see each other out of school normally) again thank you everyone x

[Beaverhausen]

Definately 1 and 2. Good luck.

[JiltedJohnsJulie]

Its good that you’ve already asked for them to be separate at High School. Hope she’s enjoyed her first transition day today.

[typoqueen]

thank you yes she had an amazing day so much so she does not want to go back to primary :) and regarding child A DD said she deliberately kept away from her during break times as she did not want her amazing day ruined, so i do believe DD is making her views known, but will still have a chat with her at the weekend.

[JiltedJohnsJulie]

She sounds like a very sensible young lady. Glad she had a nice day and I hope today is just as good [smle]