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What does your Year 6 DS do in the evenings?

(18 Posts)
Anjelika Sun 11-Feb-18 19:49:19

My DS is 11 this month. He is a nice enough kid but seems to want to spend all his time st home in his room. I can't help but think he's a bit young to be doing this. He likes running and goes to a running club one evening a week and does park run at the weekend and goes to Scouts. If you ask him what he wants to do at the weekend, he just wants to "chill." He plays on his phone in his room and watches you tube a lot but, even if it's not screen time ,he still wants to be in there just listening to music and reading or playing. My DH and I can't seem to get him interested in doing anything really. We have 2 younger DCs and they get on well enough but my eldest just seems to want to be on his own a lot. Just interested to hear what other boys the same age are like at home really or get some suggestions of stuff to get him out of his room. He will only watch telly with the rest of us if it's something he really wants to watch.

Backingvocals Sun 11-Feb-18 20:00:46

DS is not quite like this but he does spend a ridiculous amount of time on screens and would rather do that than engage. I'm a single parent and I work FT and I find it quite difficult to be always arranging stuff and organising activities - and the last two weeks I've been really ill with flu. So he's got into a habit of being on his own in the evening watching a screen while I quietly die on the sofa.

He's not a reader and not into drawing or craft. There's not much on the TV that we share - it's basically Horrible Histories or nothing. He likes sports but he can't be at sport every evening because I literally can't take him every single night. I find it difficult. So no advice here - just posting for support and to hear what others do.

Titsywoo Sun 11-Feb-18 20:04:05

DS spends quite a lot of time in his room. Sometimes on the PC watching youtube or programming. Recently he has been reading a lot. He does get bored after a while though and wants to go out so we go swimming or out on bikes. Every now and then he does stuff with his sister but she is 13 now and tends to want to be alone watching boyband videos etc. I don't see either of them much nowadays!

TheTurnOfTheScrew Sun 11-Feb-18 20:05:43

I have a DD of the same age. She doesn't do loads in the evenings either TBH - mainly reading or iPad. I do try and put stuff on iplayer that we're all interested in and can watch together - stuff like Blue Planet, The Apprentice, I'm a Celeb - but there's not much on at the moment. We all love a board game, although it depends on what else I've got to do as to whether I can spare the time, but I do try and get one out a couple of times weekly.

Anjelika Sun 11-Feb-18 21:17:11

Really glad to hear I'm not on my own in this. We watched The Apprentice together and the Michael McIntyre Saturday night family show that was on before Xmas but now struggling to find anything. My DS doesn't like cycling so a family cycle ride is never met with any enthusiasm. He does like a board game but even then it can seem he's just biding his time till screen time!

saladdays66 Mon 19-Feb-18 09:48:19

Football, running, seeing friends in park, parkour, scooting and biking.

If he's inside he's reading, watching TV or on the ipad watching YouTube (scooting tutorial mainly). He also plays on the Wii and loves Pokemon, so spends a long time arranging his card collection and having battles.

We have a family day out each weekend though, and I';d be doing thaht with yours - it's not good to spend so much time in their room alone, especially unsupervised with a screen.

StealthPolarBear Mon 19-Feb-18 09:50:31

Similar op. Ds also enjoys lego and spends a lot of time doing g that. But the increase in time in his room has definitely been a recent thing.
That said 8yo dd also spends a lot of time in her room, playing schools with her stuffed toys.

Karid1496 Mon 19-Feb-18 18:07:39

My dd11 is similar, prefers to be a homebody but will go out and about on a rare occasion. I was quite worried for a while but I've come to learn that it's just how some kids are, some just need time to recharge more than others. Also, things are alot different from when we were that age, so many new things to keep their interests. As long as they are happy and there are no problems making them shut themselves away we just need to let them be and let them lead the way (which from a mother's point of view isn't always easy, ha). Xxx

Anjelika Mon 19-Feb-18 20:11:30

Hi Karid. It is hard to just let them get on with it sometimes isn't it? I think my DS is happy enough - I don't think he's shutting himself in his room for negative reasons. He just likes to be on his own quite a bit. He came out on a long family walk yesterday and (half term this week) happily went out with DH and siblings today. Guess he's just growing up.

Karid1496 Tue 20-Feb-18 08:47:30

Anjelika....sounds exactly the same as my dd. Doesn't shut herself out for anything bad, just likes her own space to recharge. I find it hard as a parent at this age, you never really know whats going on with them. It's good to get some reassurance that it's normal for some kids. Hugs to you xxxx

tellitlikeitispls Fri 23-Feb-18 10:42:16

My DS1 is nearly 11 and ONLY wants to be in his room on the laptop. I have parental restrictions on it, but if he can't use it, he just lies on his bed doing nothing. He never comes downstairs any more. He reads a bit at bedtime, but apart from dragging him out to football training once a week + a match on Saturday, he doesn't want to do anything. To be fair though, he never has. He's fought against 'family days out' since he was about 5. I think I'm going to see if he'll play cards with me...

FineSpanishLady Sat 24-Feb-18 07:38:58

Can you have a no screens in the bedroom rule? I’m not a screen puritan by any means (my kids play on the PS a lot, and they will watch nature programmes with me or sport with their dad) but we do still have fixed times of day when they can have screen time, and no screens except in the family room downstairs. That might mean that your DS a) has less screen time and b) spends more time with the family, even if he is on a screen. My DS is 10 and he spends quite a lot of time in his room, but then so did I at the age. He likes to read, invent games, listen to music, just chill out. I have no problem with that. He’s quite an introvert - that’s just who he is. School and clubs give him plenty of social interaction.

ladymelbourne1926 Sat 24-Feb-18 07:57:25

My son is nearly 11 we sometimes watch a movie in the evening, he goes dancing, swimming, ice skating, he plays with Lego, reads and when it's warmer plays out with friends.
Is never in his room tbh. But then we watch no tv unless to watch something specific like a movie and no other screens.

ShowOfHands Sat 24-Feb-18 08:16:15

I have a y6 DD. They're under a lot of pressure with SATs and I think they do need to unwind. Different children do that in different ways. DD goes to choir one evening and drama two evenings. We try to have one family evening a week too and no screen time after 5pm. Her preference outside of these times is to be in her room. Mostly reading and writing and drawing. She lets her 6yo dbro in sometimes and they play together but she does need her own space.

BaconAndAvocado Sat 03-Mar-18 15:08:30

They're under a lot of the pressure with SATs

This is very true. Our Year 6 DS does very little at school at the moment but Maths and English and lots of tests and assessments.

We're all going out tomorrow to get him off the screens and have some time interacting!

citychick Thu 05-Apr-18 14:43:05

DS , 11, has something most afternoons after school. Except Wednesday. By the time we're home it's tea, shower, bedroom for reading, lights out. I am home late 4 days out of 5 so DH will check homework and exam revision papers with him.
He'll have a bit of screen time if he can.
I am home by 7.45 latest so we will read together as he's not a fan.
Wednesdays he'll play football for an hour with his friends after school which covers after school play dates.
He's so tired that he'll flake out by around 8pm.

Milan05 Wed 29-Aug-18 10:18:24

I am a 12 year old (I will turn 13 in October) boy. In the evenings I usually read (a book or on the computer, do programming, do astronomy (I have two pairs of binoculars and a telescope, but I use the latter mostly when I go in vacations in the countryside). I love spending time in my room, especially when I read, and I sometimes play with Lego and with my 4 year old little brother. I also go to my activities such as an art class.

Milan05 Wed 29-Aug-18 10:26:26

I also shut in my room sometimes and I spend a lot of time in my room but I rarely do this for negative reasons. I am also kind of an introvert too, so I understand all the kids who want to stay in their room. I sometimes watch the TV with my family and we do sometimes do "family stuff" such as a park walk or eating at the restaurant, but it is difficult to do these because of my little brother.

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