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9 year old girl - hormones already!?

(21 Posts)
RMC123 Mon 30-Jan-17 20:14:02

Hello!
Looking for some reassurance and solidarity really. I am a mum of four lovely kids. Three DS and 1 DD. The DD is currently driving me mad! She is the youngest and has always been strong willed. She is articulate and bright, model student but a firebrand at home. Within the past few my husband has started working away in the week. Currently my daughter is proving very hard work. Answering back, fits of temper, tears over nothing, it's like having the terrible twos all over again!!
She is heading towards her tenth Birthday and I think her shape is changing so wondering if this hormones. Or is it related to her dad being away more ? Or is it both?
Probably no one can answer this but it would just be good to know I am not alone.
To be honest at the moment I am feeling exhausted. I never quite know how she is going to react from one minute to the next and it's like treading on egg shells!
I did post this earlier on another board but someone suggested I might get more answers here.

RMC123 Tue 31-Jan-17 19:15:46

Just bumping to see this if anyone can just give a struggling mum a bit of moral support! Trying to get ready to go to my book club - literally my one night out a month- and my DD is being - let's say difficult

mumontherun14 Wed 01-Feb-17 22:37:15

Hi I don't have a huge amount of advice I'm afraid. I've a DD the same age and she is very stroppy at times. Hormones, tiredness, friends all play a part I think. Go out and get a wee break you'll feel better for it xxxx

DragonitesRule Wed 01-Feb-17 22:43:13

Have been there! 9-10 was quite tricky with DD-she used to get the rage! And the crying! Very trying.

Just keep the lines of communication going/go through the book "what's happening to me?"-we just did the puberty-periods bit not the sex. And also, the fact that you're going through some changes is not an excuse to be horrid! Ensure she eats/hydrates/gets exercise/sleep and fresh air.

She's 12 now, and has been great for a while...so just waiting for the next onslaught of hormones and it's not fair!!!

feetheart Wed 01-Feb-17 22:48:45

Sorry, yes it could be hormones thrown into everything else.
My DD started to get curvier and even developed breast buds at 9. She was seriously stroppy, could roll her eyes and sigh like a drama queen, slammed doors for a living and was mean and spiteful to her little brother.
If it helps she is a calm, rational nearly 14 year old now and the little brother is the stroppy 10-11 year old!
My method of coping is to try not to engage but my God it's hard.
Running and chocolate have got me this far smile
Good luck.

ChilliMum Wed 01-Feb-17 22:54:31

Yes could well be the hormones. Dd is 10 and we have been in hormone hell for quite a while.
Initially the rage / tears / I'm so hard done by was random and would leave us floored (dd is usually v.happy and loving). We have noticed over the past 6 months an almost regular cycle (accompanied by a little acne) so I suspect her period will come soon.
Having the cycle is really helpful as we can recognise what it is and step back a bit let her rage it out so to speak. It usually passes quickly enough now (often with an apology as contrary to yesterday's opinion her life doesn't suck and we are not the worst parents in the world grin).

RMC123 Wed 01-Feb-17 22:56:44

Thank you! Weirdly comforting to know it is most probably hormones. Was starting to think either me or her or both were losing the plot!! It's the 'mood- turning - on - sixpence' that is so hard to deal with. Her brothers are older and so I am used to dealing with teenage moods. But hers have come much earlier and with much more force.
Did escape to book club ( thank God for Grandma's!) - so all was not lost!
Thanks again

TealGiraffe Wed 01-Feb-17 23:00:58

Hi i don't have kids but work in primary and hormones are ridiculous in yr5/6 so 9-11. Lots of stropping then random crying. Constant arguments and fallings out, then being bffs half an hour later and being all over each other.

We have had 2 yr5 girls start their periods since christmas, so definitely have that chat with her! One girl knew all about it and was fine, the other girl thought she was poorly and had filled her knickers with loo roll and refused to do pe. After a gentle chat with her teacher (as very unusual behaviour for girl) we discovered she had started the night before.

School called her mum who felt so guilty. She thought she had at least a couple of years left to go so hadn't really explained anything to her.

Just remember, its still your little girl even when shes a demon and it will pass grin

RMC123 Thu 02-Feb-17 21:09:27

Thanks, all reassuring. She does know about puberty and periods so think we are as prepared as we can be. Just need to ride the storm I guess. Had a long coffee and a moan today with a mum in a similar situation. Feeling strength in solidarity!

BillericayDuckie Wed 08-Feb-17 19:46:39

Came to this thread as have just been through worrying meltdown with my DD. She had just turned 10. I told her off at dinner time for swinging on her chair and suddenly she was almost hysterical - crying and laughing at the same time. She eventually said she felt sad but didn't know why, then she started laughing but said she didn't know what was funny. Was actually really scary to watch. She has been tearful last couple of days and easily upset, but the hysterical laughter was something else. Am hoping it is just hormones but may speak to her school to check everything is ok there.

2ducks2ducklings Wed 08-Feb-17 19:54:03

My daughter is 11, nearly 12 and we have been dealing with these pesky hormones for a while now. Most of the time she's the same, fab, articulate and bright girl we know and adore but every so often..... Oh my lord! It's mainly the emotional breakdowns at the minute. For example, broken hearted sobbing at the opticians because she couldn't see his computer screen (he had an anti glare cover on it) and then full scale break down at the prospect of choosing her new glasses! She's worn glasses since she was 18 months old, so this wasn't a vanity thing.
I can sometimes tell she's barely managing to contain her bubbling rage at me or her dad at times and I'm surprised she hasn't got a
constant headache with all her eye rolling!
I remember these time well myself though. Everything was just so unfair and no one knew what life was like for you!
They grow out of it though, I've heard.

2ducks2ducklings Wed 08-Feb-17 19:55:33

smile we've had an episode is hysterical crying laughter too! It was very unsettling.

Lofari Wed 08-Feb-17 19:58:36

I don't have a girl of that age but I can honestly say my 10yo DS has some rather epic mood swings of late. Life is sooooo unfair. He has earned himself the nickname Kevin (which he doesn't understand of course!)

christinarossetti Wed 08-Feb-17 20:02:44

It's up and down. My DD was like Kevin the teenager when she turned 8. Her bedroom door hasn't recovered from the amount of slamming it had.

She's 10 next month, and has been acting like a sane human being for a while, so we're awaiting the next hormone explosion.

RMC123 Thu 09-Feb-17 19:14:25

Shoot me now Ladies!! Another tantrum over spellings. Won't learn them but doesn't want to get told off tomorrow when she gets them all wrong!! Give me strength!

booellesmum Thu 09-Feb-17 19:19:41

DD1 is 15 and tbh the years between 8 and 10 were much worse than the teenage years have been.
DD2 is 12 and not really had any problems yet - note the yet!
Wishing you luck!!

Biking007 Tue 14-Feb-17 21:38:47

Oh yes I have DD 9yrs nearly 10yrs lots of dramatics swings in mood and lots answering back and winding up her little DD. We had to have a chat today about her attitude then 5mins later she's back playing teddies bless her.

StrangeIdeas Thu 16-Feb-17 16:37:15

My 10yr old DD told me just the other day she was feeling sad and didn't know why. I suspect hormones and we had a little chat about how growing up affects your mood as well as your body. She's usually really logical and rational and I could tell she hated not knowing why she felt that way. She's also been really clingy with me all half term. I feel for her. We go through it when we're young and again with our kids , bless 'em. wine helps (us not the kids grin)

FionaGL Thu 22-Jun-17 10:28:14

Thank goodness I've found this thread, thought I was going mad with my DD at the moment, but reading through everyone is having the same issues as me at the moment. Argument after argument in our house at the moment about hair, showering, teeth, friends not being nice, and me not knowing how she feels at the moment!! At least I know its semi normal for a 9 yr old grin

BuffyTy Wed 28-Jun-17 09:53:13

Can anyone recommend any books you've shared with your DDs about the hormone side of changes? We've done the physical side and the sex talk, but I'm not a hormone expert!

Karid1496 Fri 30-Jun-17 21:01:04

This thread has also helped me. My dd is 11 and has been a tad hormonal since she was 9. These last few weeks have been a nightmare, constant up and down of emotions with a lot of crying for absolutely no reason other than needing a good cry. You guys have let me see that it's normal and not something to over analys or worry about. Thanks xxxxsmile

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