low level daily 'bullying'/harassment yr7

[elephantcustard]

Ds 12 in a week moved from small village school with a group of friends to big comp which is feeder for about 8 primaries. All good until about Christmas, started going out with a gf did school play together etc she dumped him before Valentine's. Since then she and her friends have daily been tormenting him:
Throwing food in his face
Marker across his shirt
Hitting Him with bags
Knocking his stuff over
Grabbing stuff and throwing things in girls toilets

We have contacted his form tutor and he has had a meeting with deputy ht today about it but how do we support him that it's not acceptable but also how to conduct himself towards females I've not aggressive? He's very laid back has big social group, doing well and (if it had any relevance) is tall and handsome, but gets called ugly and rat face by these girls....every day
It has got to hurt
He's our first at secondary and we don't really know what to do....school have said they will deal with it but so did his form teacher months ago and it is continuing

[Chippednailvarnishing]

That's not low level, you're poor son. I'd be insisting on a meeting with his form tutor and the Deputy Head with an expectation of a plan of action .

[elephantcustard]

Thanks....we are clueless....dh and I got through our school years without bullying and we are trying to balance the rough and tumble of big school and what is not acceptable. The school has a reputation for being tough but life is about negotiating your way through it. He has said that he wouldn't move school if he had a choice....can you be picked on for being good looking?! (All children are gorgeous but he is very appealing looking, but oblivious of course) we have said my t to react ( a bit like our puppy training so that it becomes boring) a few of his friends parents have discussed it with me as his friends find it upsetting

[PinkFluffiUnicorn]

Those who shout the loudest get help, I have a ds going through similar, but it has ended up going on for far too long, then the lovely girls got some boys involved to help! This ended up with my ds being attacked after school, now have the police involved, basically annoy the school till they actively do something useful, good luck

[Chippednailvarnishing]

I'd also follow up the meeting with an email confirming what they are going to do...

[elephantcustard]

Thanks that is something I didn't think about... If any of them have big brothers etc God, poor thing, he's not going to tell me if he's really upset about it is he? He says there are daily fights in yr 7 and a lot of the children are 'really aggressive' but at 11/12 yard old?

[PinkFluffiUnicorn]

Yeah my ds is 12, the others involved are 11/12. Lots of emails and letters, a trail that cannot be ignored x

[123beanie]

What your DS is going through sounds awful
I agree with what previous posters have said. Follow up with emails, phone calls etc to ensure that this is dealt with properly. Can't believe he's been coping with it for so long.
Do all you can (and I'm sure you already are OP ) to make sure your DS knows that he is loved and appreciated, and that what's going on is just horrible and undeserved.
All the best OP

[VoleSnuffle]

I would also encourage him to write down every incident so you have a diary of events.

At Ds's school they are really hard on this type of behaviour, even if it is one child's word against another.

They see the head of year, write down their account, the bully writes their account and the bully is given a verbal warning.

They follow the bullying procedures laid out on the school's website under policies.

Make sure your school are following their bullying procedure. Do not let it go, your son needs to know you will fight his corner. Always.