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Overweight daughter

(5 Posts)
Worriedmum72 Tue 24-Nov-15 20:01:33

Hi,

I am concerned about my daughter's weight and don't know what to do.

My dd is 11yrs, 153cms and 8st. She has never been skinny, but not fat either, she has basically been following the 75centile in height and 91st in weight and still is, but she is very chubby round the middle.

She has always been in clothes older than her age - mainly due to her height, but sometimes because of her tummy. She can't fit into jeans very well and lives in jeggings, leggings and the likes. She has now become body conscious and is getting upset that she is bigger than most of her classmates (to be fair she doesn't look fat all over, just heavy and has a big tummy).

However, I am a bit confused why, as she eats healthier than most kids in her class and my 13yr old ds (who doesn't have an ounce of fat on him).

Typical day :

Breakfast-
Sachet golden syrup porridge with 1% fat milk
Cup of milk

Snack - quavers or Apple

Lunch-
warburton thins
Laughing cow or tuna and salad
Grapes
Carrot sticks
Kit Kat or Alpen bar light

Snack - carrots and mini hummus pot or breadsticks / rice cakes etc

Tea-
1 Tortilla wrap with homemade chilli and salad or
Fishcake, 1.5 waffles, half mini tin beans
Salmon, new potatoes and broccoli
Etc
Then Ski mousse or ww yogurt

I have counted it on myfitnesspal and it's about 1200 cals. She eats more at weekends but not overly. She has no sweets during the week but allowed treats on Friday and Saturday.
She does netball at school, but her other activities aren't sport based so I am aware she needs more exercise - will be addressing this after Xmas.

I had to have a conversation with her about it as she would constantly eat if she could and her brother is growing so needs more and she thinks this is unfair - like I said though he is a teenager, slim and constantly hungry. I am terrified it will become an issue but said we should all be more healthy etc not focussing on only her (but she thinks I am singling her out and gets upset).

I feel like I am going about it all the wrong way, she would be fine if she was 7st 2lbs (be 75th centiile for height and weight then) but should I try and help her lose weight or what? I love her more than anything in the world, but 1 friend said i am setting her up for future weight issues And another said to nip it in the bud now and control it while I can control what she eats. Am feeling overwhelmed.

Ubik1 Tue 24-Nov-15 20:13:49

First you need to give her confidence in her appearance and highlight all the other great things about her - kind, funny, friendly whatever.

I would them give her opportunity to find some exercise she enjoys - swimming, dancing, or even more unusual stuff like riding or climbing.

I would cut the snacks. My 11 year old has:
porridge or 2 or 3 weetabix for breakfast, sometimes a slice of buttered toast.
Snack - apple or orange
Lunch - school lunch or a sandwich
Dinner - burger/home made chips or chicken legs with couscous or pasta and salad or sausage and chips or chicken curry and rice. Then fruit or small dessert.

I'm not claiming my daughter eats particularly healthily but she is not overweight. She does a fair amount of exercise though:

Monday - gym then after school swim club (30 mins of lengths) then 90 mins of athletics.

Saturday - dancing 1 hour

Sunday - swimming with friends.

Walks 15 mins to and from school, and walks to all activities.

Speaking as someone who was a chubby child, stepping up the exercise and dropping snacks made a real difference.

smile hope that's helpful

Sallyhasleftthebuilding Tue 24-Nov-15 20:17:21

DD is the same, however she gets bigger right before a growth spurt.

patterkiller Tue 24-Nov-15 20:19:35

I'm not saying it's a non issue, but both my Dds put weight on around their middle at that age then within 18 months lost it all to height gain. It's a time of change, puberty will be on full throttle. Also their bodies are actually producing cells for growth, imagine how hungry you would be if you were growing bones. But please don't make it a weight issue with her, concentrate on promoting healthy eating and get out and go for a walk with her.

MrsPnut Tue 24-Nov-15 20:21:06

Our daughter is tall and dense, she's got a bit of a tummy but is also very muscly.

She has a brioche or porridge for breakfast.
Lunch is a cheese and ham roll, a tube yoghurt, a cheese string, a chocolate biscuit, a yo yo and a few fridge raiders or similar.
For dinner she might have pasta and meatballs with tomato sauce, or chicken wraps. No puddings during the week but maybe the odd square of chocolate.

For exercise she has girls football at lunchtime on Monday, rugby after school and then an hour of swimming and then cubs. Tuesday is chilling, Wednesday is street dance, Thursday and Friday are other clubs, Saturday is another hour of swimming and then a nature group and Sunday is rugby training and usually some dog walking at least three times a week.

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