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What time do your 12 going on 13 year olds come in now it's dark!!!

(8 Posts)
Penny45 Fri 16-Oct-15 23:56:03

As the subject says really. What time do you think is a good time for 12/13 year olds to come in. We live in a small town and about a 20 min walk from the local park. My son and his friends which age between 12.13 and 14 all hang out at the local park on their scooters and sometimes in the town. I'm quite strict and he is my only one and in summer I said he had to come in at 8pm in the week and 9pm at weekends. He would tell me most of his Mates could come in at 10pm but I won't agree to that as feel he's too young. Now it's getting dark I want to change the 9pm to 8pm but he has the biggest tantrums when I suggest this. Saying he's the only one and all his friends can stay out later etc. it's a nightmare and just lately every day is a battle with him. so I just wondered what everyone else did with night time curfews. Am I being too strict? Also he wants to go to an under 18's nightclub in the next town which I've said no to and next year he can when he's 13. Agsin am I being too strict??

Dotty342kids Mon 19-Oct-15 11:27:22


I don't have this particular issue as mine doesn't really go out with mates after school. However, I can imagine that if he did, I'd definitely want him in at the times you've suggested. Also, I'd want him in bed by 10pm, not only just strolling in through the door smile!
There's also no way he'd be going to an under 18's nightclub event at this age unless I was very confident about the way it was run and the friends he intended to go with!
However, I do appreciate that at this age, they want to spread their wings and being made to do things differently to their mates is a bit of a killer issue for them. So how about you pick him up from the park at something like 8.30? (From a discreet distance of course!) Would he be ok with that?

derektheladyhamster Mon 19-Oct-15 11:31:16

My yr 8 doesn't go out much after tea. If he does he's at a mates house until 7ish. He's in bed at 8.30. There is no way I'd let him hang about outside after dark. He might not want to hang about outside when the temperature drops!

SixtyFootDoll Mon 19-Oct-15 11:32:46

My 12 year old comes in when it gets dark if he's outdoors.If he's at a friends I'll collect him at 8.

BackforGood Mon 19-Oct-15 18:43:34

At thT ge, mine would only be out, if they were 'at' something. Playing in the park is for a weekend / holiday afternoon, not an evening activity IMO.

Dancergirl Tue 20-Oct-15 09:19:03

I don't think this is about the dark issue, more the fact that I wouldn't want my child hanging round in the park on school nights. Doesn't he have homework to do? Does he do any organised activities/sports etc?

Penny45 Tue 20-Oct-15 15:09:12

Yes he has homework to do and he does this on the day he gets it. He also has football on Monday evenings. It's mainly Friday and Saturdays and week days in the school holidays, that we have this huge battle with him about what time to come in. As the clocks go back this weekend we will be telling him 7.30 I think

Chasingsquirrels Fri 23-Oct-15 11:01:05

My 13yo (yr8) ds doesn't "go out" of his own accord. But we live in a village with no facilities.
I'm wondering how to get him out of the house and socialising!

I think 8pm weekdays and 9pm weekends is late enough.

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