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DD being bullied by former BFF

(6 Posts)
spirifer Thu 03-Sep-15 14:30:24

Up to now my 11 year old DD was a very keen rider at our local stables, so much so the family clubbed together to buy her a pony, which is stabled at the stables.

There were two slightly older girls already there, but all three (with my DD) got on well together. One of them then left, and the remaining girl and my DD became very close, texting/calling/Instagram-ing all the time, and having sleepovers at each other's houses, and generally being BFFs.

While we were on holiday this summer the BFF started posting quite hurtful things on Instagram, saying that new girls had started at the stables and she was no longer BFFs with my DD, and eventually blocked my DD altogether.

I hoped everything would calm down and go back to normal once we returned from holiday, but on the first day back at the stables when I went to collect my DD I found her in tears because her former BFF had been with one of the new girls and had ignored my DD all day. My DD seemed to be getting on well with another new girl (I'll call her K) at the stables though.

The former BFF's mum then cornered me and said that everybody had been getting on well until my DD spoiled it by being nasty to the former BFF and swearing at her. My DD and K said that this wasn't true.

The next day my DD and K were at the stables together all day and getting on really well, but when the former BFF turned up, she took K off with her and then told my DD that K had told her that my DD had been saying nasty things about her all day. I think that K is scared of the former BFF and her new friend, as she then also turned on my DD. All of the other girls are slightly older than my DD.

Today my DD refused to go to the stables, and is basically very down and tearful. I really don't know what to do. To make matters worse, my DD is due to start secondary school next week, and this has seriously dented her confidence.

I shall be so grateful for any suggestions or advice anyone can give us. sad

JiltedJohnsJulie Thu 03-Sep-15 21:26:43

Is moving the pony to another stables an option?

spirifer Thu 03-Sep-15 21:34:41

Thankfully, my DD seems keen to go to the stables again tomorrow, so we shall see how things go. But - yes - moving the pony elsewhere will be the next step if the bullying carries on, sadly. We like the stables and the staff and the owner, and it is always so against the grain to be forced to do things simply because other people are so nasty.

JiltedJohnsJulie Thu 03-Sep-15 21:44:20

Yes but it seems that this girl isn't worthy of your DDs friendship. Does she have any friends who are going to her high school too? Could you invite one of those over for a couple of hours?

Lilybensmum1 Thu 03-Sep-15 21:45:04

Awful how girls can be so spiteful, it's good your dd can talk to you though,and I guess at least worst case you have the ability to move the pony. Hope it works out for your dd I have a 7 year old dd and dread this sort of thing.

JiltedJohnsJulie Fri 04-Sep-15 17:31:36

Hope she's had a better day today.

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