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My 10 year old boy is piling on weight

(70 Posts)
CarolDW Sat 20-Dec-14 17:50:27

Recently i've noticed that my ds has been putting a lot of weight on, he's 4"5 and is 6 stone 3, so I think that makes him overweight. He certainly looks overweight and he's a lot fatter than he ever has been. He hates sport and eats loads of food, he often tries to take it from cupboards secretly. He's rapidly outgrowing his clothes and a lot of people are starting to notice it. Anyone in the same boat ? What should I do ?

Guyropes Sat 20-Dec-14 18:02:40

Hi carol. This must be tough. I'm sure more experienced people will come along soon, but I just wanted to ask about him 'hating sport'. Is it competitive sport that he hates? In which case are there non competitive activities be can get involved in? I think it is crucial for kids to participate in an exercise based activity on a regular basis, as our lifestyles simply do not encourage an appropriate amount of exercise for children to grow up fit and maintain fitness into adulthood.

It sounds like he has discovered food= pleasure. I'm interested to know what others say about this as I am slightly concerned about my 10 yr old dd's appetite...

CarolDW Sat 20-Dec-14 18:06:33

It's not just competitive sport he hates, he just hates all physical activity. He doesn't like his PE lessons at school and when he's on the school yard at break/lunch he just sits and chats instead of running around.

recall Sat 20-Dec-14 18:06:42

speaking from personal experience, I would address the activity, and not the food. My Mum encouraged me to reduce my calories as a child, which resulted in me being morbidly obese as an adult. I became obsessed with dieting etc from the age of 12. Looking back, I wish she'd helped me work out a way of becoming more active,and discreetly addressed the food, encouraging healthy alternatives rather than denying me food that I liked.

Activity hasn't got to come in the form of sport, my 7 year old daughter has just spent the day out beating on a pheasant shoot with her Dad, she has walked miles, but wasn't thinking about it because she was so distracted by everything going on around her. How about something like orienteering ? Then he would have his mind on that and the exercise would be a side effect. I went ice skating recently, and had a right good laugh, but when I'd finished I was sweating like mad. If he can get gripped by an activity, the excercise will come ? Surfing ? Dancing ...a boy friendly sort? Something else I've noticed is that when the children go outdoors and do something knackering, they are so hungry they eat anything, so a chance to slip in something healthy unnoticed .

Hope this helps, and good on you for clocking it early.

ShebaQueen Sat 20-Dec-14 18:08:47

My 13 year old is the same. He's piling on weight and lots of his clothes are too tight. It doesn't help that he's not very sporty and his hobbies are mainly sedentary - he likes reading, gaming, building models etc.

I am trying to find an activity that he enjoys and I'm considering a family gym membership. I'm overweight myself and I'd hate him to end up like me.

CarolDW Sat 20-Dec-14 18:15:15

ShebaQueen- What's your son's height/weight ?

ShebaQueen Sat 20-Dec-14 18:24:22

Not sure exactly, he's about 5'6 and weighs about 10 stone. Most of the weight seems to be on his tummy. I try to provide a healthy balanced diet but he's constantly hungry so portion sizes are large and he always asks for seconds and he admitted that he's been using his pocket money to buy sweets on the way home from school.

We've been for a brisk walk today and used pedometers (he likes numbers, statistics and a target). It was a lovely day and we had a good uninterrupted chat which was nice. I had to nag him to come but he said it was "ok" in the end.

CarolDW Sat 20-Dec-14 18:34:20

There's a lot of weight on my DS's tummy too, i've noticed he seems to have trouble keeping his belly hidden when he's wearing some tops.

Guyropes Sat 20-Dec-14 18:37:15

I think recall is right, there are ways to get engaged with physical activity. but furthermore, i believe you need to help him understand that you can't have a healthy life if you hate all physical activity. He will find it hard if he is unfit and carrying a lot of weight, but he needs to find a positive somewhere in some form of activity. (Easier said than done!)

tribpot Sat 20-Dec-14 18:46:22

My ds hates competitive sport and things like dodge ball. He's young for his year so he always has a disadvantage in terms of height and agility compared to the older boys. But at the sports centre they do a class called 'Junior Fitness' which seems to be like circuit training for kids, I know they do spinning and loads of running. He loves this and a number of his friends go too, so they like the social aspect as well. Can you maybe have a word with another parent and see if a friend would go along too?

CarolDW Sat 20-Dec-14 18:46:54

I keep trying to get him active but he ends up struggling with the activity and then decides that he never wants to do it again.

CarolDW Sat 20-Dec-14 18:50:27

An interesting thing I've noticed about ds is that when I took him to a climbing wall a few weeks ago he was incredibly reluctant to have a go and made no effort whatsoever, but when he's at home he'll try very hard to climb in order to reach food from cupboards hmm

catsofa Sat 20-Dec-14 18:54:09

I hate sport too, but I like riding my bike either purely as transport to get somewhere (could he cycle to school?) or for fun trips out e.g. tootling around the park or along the canal.

I also like gardening, and caring for outdoor animals like horses (if in a city, is there a city farm near you who will take child volunteers?).

All of these things are not necessarily very active all the time, but they all naturally result in exertion in the course of doing them - enjoying doing them is the primary reason to do them, with exercise as a big side benefit, if you see what I mean. Do you think he'd go for something like that?

catsofa Sat 20-Dec-14 18:55:57

BTW a bike computer is great fun and might appeal if he likes to see the numbers - they tell you what speed you're doing, how far you've cycled etc.

3littlebadgers Sat 20-Dec-14 18:58:32

I feel for you. The difficult thing is how to address the issue and get him on the right track, without making it a big thing in his mind. Do you think he is conscious of the weight gain himself?
I don't know your circumstances, but would be increasing the amount he has to walk help? We live a good hours walk away from school or 15 minutes in the car. Weather permitting we walk. I don't tend to have crisps and sweets etc in the house, we do sometimes but generally tend just not to. I do make my own deserts and I wouldn't ever ban certain foods as I think it just breeds desire in them. If we have managed to walk to school everyday, on the Friday I will suggest to the children that we could chose something from the shop on the way to school as we have used a lot of energy this week walking. I'm hoping that they will build the association between balancing energy in and out. Maybe it might help with your son. Good luck thanks

dementedma Sat 20-Dec-14 19:03:37

12 year old Ds here is overweight. Like other posters he hates sport other than table tennis which he does sometimes at lunchtime at school. He won't join any clubs as he is shy and doesn't like groups of people that he doesn't know. Its really difficult. We talk about healthy eating etc and I cook from scratch, as does he - he likes cooking- but without exercise he's not burning anything off. He can't walk to school, its too far, and won't go to any after school clubs.

CarolDW Sat 20-Dec-14 19:08:54

He always goes to school by car because i'm not sure how to get to it by walking, but sometimes i'll take him to the beach on a weekend and he might run around a little and play in the sea. We live near the beach so he often goes with his schoolfriends (although I think they just go and eat a lot as opposed to playing)

CarolDW Sat 20-Dec-14 19:23:47

dementedma- I wish I could get my ds interested in cooking

catsofa Sat 20-Dec-14 19:29:37

i'm not sure how to get to it by walking that's easy enough to find out, do you not do much exercise either? Would it be possible to park further away from school and walk the last mile, even if you can't walk all the way?

CarolDW Sat 20-Dec-14 19:37:08

I do quite a lot of exercise but I don't really think parking further away from the school would be practical because there isnt anywhere to park and ds would probably complain too much.

Sid77 Sat 20-Dec-14 19:46:55

So you know anyone with a dog who needs walking? Walking in a beach with a dog is great fun... Re the parking a bit away from school and then walking - maybe do this and don't give him the choice? If he complains - tough. He'll get used to it. Kids who have to walk (as I did, no car, no bus) get used to it.

CarolDW Sat 20-Dec-14 19:49:54

Dog walking wouldn't work, he was attacked by a dog once and is very frightened to interact with dogs now.

Whereisegg Sat 20-Dec-14 20:17:14

There isn't anywhere to park within a one mile radius of your sons school?

Guyropes Sat 20-Dec-14 20:34:45

Your son is probably going to complain about any changes you make. And changes need to be made. You might just have to put up with the complaints and stand firm on any change of routine.

KiaOraOAotearoa Sat 20-Dec-14 20:35:35

I tell my DD:that's too much sugar, have an apple/banana. I also say: that's enough, you don't need that much.
We go for long walks at the weekend. She swims every week. She walks to school and back.
I am the mother, she'll do as I say, the fact that she complains is neither here nor there, sorry. I know she is entitled to her opinions/wishes etc, but she's the child and I am the mother. End of.

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