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My dd's 10 yr old friend has deliberately pissed on her laptop in her bedroom

(65 Posts)
anothernamechange111 Wed 12-Feb-14 21:35:07

Out of jealousy or something..god knows.Its a boy.He has pee'd in it on monday while she was downstairs.It was on her beanbag and that got pee'd over too.Am bloody furious but dont know what i could/should do about it!!!

ForTheLoveOfSocks Sat 15-Feb-14 09:58:41

I personally wouldn't want to encourage my Dd to have a friendship with someone who could treat her like that, troubled or not. What sort of message does it give her? I would not want her thinking it's acceptable to allow yourself to be treated in such a disgusting way.

Martorana Sat 15-Feb-14 09:54:44

I think it was the cat.

CharlesRyder Sat 15-Feb-14 08:54:12

The OP can't lie to get the repairs paid for Journey!!!

Journeytolight Sat 15-Feb-14 08:38:34

You could say that your DD saw him. I would definitely talk to the boy's parents. They need to pay up for the repairs!!!

Morgause Thu 13-Feb-14 08:07:25

I know you feel sorry for him but I really think it's time to discourage this friendship, particularly if your daughter has gone off him anyway.

She has to be your priority and who knows what he'll do next?

Seeline Thu 13-Feb-14 08:04:22

I'm a bit confused. You say this happened Monday afternoon. And then say the laptop wasn't used again until Wednesday afternoon, when it and the beanbag were soaking wet. Surely things would have dried out by then? And your DDs room would have smelt of wee on Monday evening (thinking of when DCs have wet the bed) but you didn't notice this?

frugalfuzzpig Thu 13-Feb-14 07:51:34

Thingsthat - god that's horrific sad how awful for you all.

frugalfuzzpig Thu 13-Feb-14 07:50:32

I definitely agree about telling the school. Not in a 'you need to bring this up with him' way, but partly so they can understand any tension/arguments between them, and partly (mostly) so they can build up a picture of the inappropriate/worrying behaviour happening outside school sad let them know you are worried about him. Though it may help to tell the school you don't want it getting back to the family that you've told them.

I'd also have a frank discussion with DD. Does she actually want to keep seeing him outside school? It may be that she feels obliged to.

(As an afterthought, if she is still happy for him to visit - and I totally agree it must ONLY be in family rooms from now on - he could maybe bring his iPad so he can actually use it on your wifi? That might help the jealousy issue)

ThingsThatGoBumpInTheNight Thu 13-Feb-14 00:07:33

If you'd have said 12 year old I'd have known exactly who you were on about and exactly same background story..
phew this lad I know .. Peed on a doll and in shoes belonging to his sister when he was ten, like a bloody tomcat FFs.

I don't know if I'd raise it with them (parents) but I'd definitely keep dd away from him as SS when he did the same thing at the same age said he hadn't tried to wee, he'd tried to - and I quote - wank off and come all over the doll to teach SD a 'lesson' for being mean to him earlier that day.

Very worrying behaviour from a boy of that age, and fwiw he ended up later on abusing my DS and grooming him for far worse than when I caught it.

I'd cut all contact but you might choose to try to help him. Get a meeting arranged with the child protection officer at school, see what they think and if it's worth escalating.
You might find its a piece of a puzzle the school are building up, and it might make them contact social services.

perplexedpirate Wed 12-Feb-14 23:50:16

I think Martorana has it.
Judge your next move from his reaction, but I definitely wouldn't rule out notifying social services.
And don't leave him alone with your DD again.
Bad sitch for all concerned. sad

Martorana Wed 12-Feb-14 23:11:30

Too late now, but i think I would have let your dd believe it was the cat.

Could you somehow suddenly discover that it did smell like cat pee after all? I think dealing with another child doing something like this is a bit much for a 10 year old.

Then, next time he comes round I would ask him, out of your dd's earshot, if he knows anything about the laptop being broken and see what he says..

5OBalesofHay Wed 12-Feb-14 23:10:56

No, absolutely don't allow him to be alone with dd if she's so young, it is worrying behavior and whilst you would be right to be concerned about his circumstances, your dd is your main concern

LynetteScavo Wed 12-Feb-14 23:09:35

Anyone can register on FB if they lie about their age.

Facebook does take into consternation some of their users are minors. If people have lied about their age, when FB thinks they are 18, they will actually still be 15, but FB won't know that....

VoyageDeVerity Wed 12-Feb-14 23:09:04

Don't let this it in the house again and discourage the friendship pronto.

bexincornwall Wed 12-Feb-14 23:07:31

There will be a child welfare officer allocated to the care of children at your child's school - you can raise your concerns with them & even if they don't take action it will help them in future interaction with the child (which sounds likely!). Very disturbed behaviour, I wouldn't leave him unsupervised again if you are kind enough to let him back in your house (I'm not that nice - kids don't get invited back to mine after much more minor misdemeanors!).

MuttonCadet Wed 12-Feb-14 23:07:05

I'd definitely want him away from my daughter. He does sound troubled.

colditz Wed 12-Feb-14 23:04:13

Facebook doesn't allow children of ten to register, and facebookbis inappropriate for ten year olds. However, the issue here is not Facebook.

I would advise that you tell his teacher what has happened, and don't leave him alone with your daughter.

JeanSeberg Wed 12-Feb-14 22:59:12

Apologies 50.

5OBalesofHay Wed 12-Feb-14 22:57:34

Not a dig, I didn't think Facebook allowed them to register if under 13. Have got it wrong (but got away with refusing so not all bad).

JeanSeberg Wed 12-Feb-14 22:49:13

And a not so subtle dig about you letting your daughter have FB at the age of 10...

TheOriginalSteamingNit Wed 12-Feb-14 22:45:39

Helpful, 50bales confused

anothernamechange111 Wed 12-Feb-14 22:42:50

she is 10 i mean.she is v nearly 11.

anothernamechange111 Wed 12-Feb-14 22:42:26

yes she is.most of her 10 yr old friends are also on facebook so i relented and let her join.

JeanSeberg Wed 12-Feb-14 22:38:09

I assume they are the same age?

5OBalesofHay Wed 12-Feb-14 22:33:52

I wouldn't encourage a friendship between a teen and a 10 year old anyway (assuming your dd is at least 13 as on Facebook) I'd try to help her make friends her own age.

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