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What do 10 year old girls do on 'play dates'?

(20 Posts)
jinglebellsarecoming Sun 24-Nov-13 11:22:46

Hello there experts. My DD(nearly 10) is having troubles when friends come over as she is on the not so grown up side of the maturity scale and still likes to play dolls, imaginary games etc etc. Her friends however are not really into that so there is quite a lot of awkward hanging around. I thought I could provide some focus or activities to help things flow but don't know what. So my question is what do other 10 year old girls do when they have a 'play date' at home?

exexpat Sun 24-Nov-13 11:27:21

DD (just turned 11) is quite grown-up for her age, but still played with Sylvanians, lego etc on playdates last year. Otherwise, a lot of girls that age are into crafty stuff or baking - get materials for cupcakes and decorations, or a load of beads, origami paper, felt or whatever for them to make stuff? Jamming session on musical instruments (real or improvised) with something to record it?

But normally by 9 or 10, if it is a good friend she has invited round, I would expect them to be able to entertain themselves without much if any input from me.

toolatetobed Sun 24-Nov-13 11:43:57

Could you arrange for your DD to go swimming with a friend? My 10-year-old DD is currently really into going swimming with her friends.

dopeysheep Sun 24-Nov-13 11:46:27

Definitely an activity just playing on scooters/visit the park playground. Swimming is great nearly every kid loves swimming.
Play games on a ds/x box/ games thingy?

NoComet Sun 24-Nov-13 11:55:12

Very dependent on which visitor at that age.

DD2 and her less mature DF still played schools, sometimes with every build a bear and similar size doll as pupils, often DD2 actually teaching her DF.

Many of her friends, Hama beads, making buns, cooperative Wii and CD games, disappearing to room and doing I know not what, trampolining.

With her top table partner in crime playing SIMs and being proto teens.

And with her very shy DF, I have no idea, except they have been very close since before they were two years old and met at nursery. (shy DF wouldn't talk to adults without looking like a startled rabbit)

DD2 wants to teach at primary, and subconsciously when little and I thing almost deliberately when older, she works out what to do for hear and her DF to have fun.

DD1 doesn't do this at all, she has play dates with the DCs who are on her slightly wild eccentric wavelength only. Attempts at having my friends DD over were hard work at 10 and hopeless at 13 (DD1 wants to trampoline, race about having water fights, climb trees, chatter about Dr.Who, science and mess about being hunger games charecters and be a big 10yo forever. DDs DD wants to be a teen. It doesn't work.)

jinglebellsarecoming Sun 24-Nov-13 11:56:27

Good ideas. We have a Kinnect thingy but we never use it so need to dust it off, swimming good idea but one for DH as I hate swimming. As for leaving them to it, I don't think DD has the social skills for when there is no joint focus as often the other kids come and find me to chat to. DD is an only child which may have something to do with it. Good ideas keep them coming. Also any tips on how to develop social skills?

Madmog Sun 24-Nov-13 13:30:06

My daughter's friends always seem to enjoy getting paints out (I think this is because some haven't got them or their parents don't really like the mess). They also seem to enjoy recording themselves singing/dancing/making music or taking silly photos of themselves if you don't mind them messing around with your camera. Also, computer games. If it's someone she doesn't know that well, what about a DVD with some sweets? I know some Mums get the girls to decorate their own pizzas and then have them for tea. You might find it you have two friends around at the same time that's easier, and there's less pressure on your daughter to communicate constantly.

duckyfuzz Sun 24-Nov-13 13:35:37

Nearly 10 yo twins here, they like:
Craft stuff like friendship bracelets
Paint nails (drives me nuts!)
Hama/aqua beads
Go out on bikes/scooters
Talk about boys

Slimchance Sun 24-Nov-13 13:54:30

I have a 10 yr old (also an "only" and also on the "young" side).

And it is a difficult age in that half of dd is still interested in imaginary games, dolls, toys, toy cars etc and half of her is interested in listening to screechy music (girls I've never heard of who sing through their noses in a horribly breathy way) nail-painting, hair-plaiting etc, dancing to music etc.

She and her bf go horse-riding, biking and roller-skating together, play on the trampoline, paint each other's nails, make friendship bracelets, enjoy science experiments, and also sew and knit, bake, and enjoy various craft activities.

I have to say that we are very lucky in that dd's bf is really lovely, incredibly amenable and easy-going and joins in enthusiastically in anything that happens to be going on. I can only hope and pray that dd is as pleasant and easy-going at her bf's house.

If dd has a friend over for an afternoon (say 2-6) they generally entertain themselves for the majority of the time but at some point I will either produce a craft activity or some cakes to make/decorate so there is one point of focus for the afternoon. If a friend is here for a sleepover then I will allow a DVD but they rarely watch one all the way through.

Kits like these are good because everything you need is contained within the box and dd and her friend give the end results away as presents.

jinglebellsarecoming Sun 24-Nov-13 16:08:31

Thank you so much everyone. Gonna get me a preteen activity cupboard going. This age really is like the toddler years with more attitude but better conversations!

Moomoomie Sun 24-Nov-13 16:16:37

Mine enjoyed crafty things.
Ceramic painting.
Glass painting.
Hama beads.
It was about that age they got into the Top Model books, designing dresses etc.
Now they are teenagers they are rarely seen out of the bedroom when they have a friend round.

ICameOnTheJitney Sun 24-Nov-13 16:22:11

My DD is 9 and she and her friends...some of whom are 10, tend to draw and craft a lot. Otherwise they go to the cinema...or I may take them out to the cafe for a hot chocolate and a spin round the park on bikes.

Heifer Sun 24-Nov-13 17:31:45

It depends on which friend we have over.

Friend 1 - they will both play outside, tennis, scooters, football, netball etc or in bedroom listening to their music and chatting

Friend 2 - Makeovers (nails, makeup, hair) sylvanians

Friend 3 - They love creating magazines.

There is some crossover but friend 3 isn't sporty and Friend 1 wouldn't do makeovers.

DD is very sporty but also loves some crafty stuff and makeovers.

I found playdates hard when she was 8, but I think now I've stopped inviting over my friends children and let her pick who she wants to come, it's easy as they have more in common..

TeenAndTween Sun 24-Nov-13 19:01:03

No one has mentioned board games yet.
My DD age 9 likes Guess Who, The London Game, Monopoly, Cluedo, Pay Day, Mastermind. Friends may need to be taught them, but if they know and like them it gives a good focus.

Lonecatwithkitten Mon 25-Nov-13 15:19:00

Up till 18 months ago after a play date DD's bedroom looked like it had exploded. Now all the sylvanians are out perfectly arranged, it seems to me they chat whilst placing sylvanians.

dopeysheep Mon 25-Nov-13 15:27:01

TeenandTween makes an excellent point - my dd loves board games, even the rubbish/dull ones and you can often pick them up really cheaply in charity shops.

NoComet Mon 25-Nov-13 22:35:29

Cameras are a good idea. Both DDs laptop and her ipod have various silly frames and aps for messing about with photos, which go down well.

They also let you see the fancy plait in the back of your hair.

As for social skills, I have no idea. DD1 and me are hopeless DH can do it with effort and DD2 just makes friends totally naturally

Takver Tue 26-Nov-13 20:01:38

Make a shocking mess grin

This has not changed age 11 nearly 12 . . .

meditrina Thu 28-Nov-13 19:25:11

Making stuff it always good.

Trying on every single item of the host's clothes and them leaving them all over the floor seems to be mandatory.

Going out for super soaker water pistol fights (perhaps wait until spring for that one) has always been popular.

fedupandfifty Sat 30-Nov-13 18:09:21

Mine loved making videos with the tablet/ camera. Also swimming, and generally mooching about in the park. Still interested in biking to and from school, and revelling in new-found independence.

Also yes to dressing up, messing about and causing chaos in the house.

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