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Can I ask your opinion?

(10 Posts)
theredhen Mon 23-May-11 11:03:48

If your year 7 child came home with a detention for doing something which could have seriously harmed another child in a science lesson and the child and parent were told that they narrowly missed being excluded, would you accept that a 1 hr detention after school was enough and that you wouldn't discuss it with your child anymore?

What would you do or say to your child in that instance?

highhopes2010 Mon 23-May-11 11:13:19

I think it depends on the parent too.For instance if that was my child that had done something that bad at school he would be grounded/loose his electrical gear/go to bed early for the rest of the week.So it wouldn't just be the 1 hour detention at school he would be having.I don't think the schools are allowed to give longer then an hour for a 7 yo are they?

highhopes2010 Mon 23-May-11 11:14:12

Oh and he would also have to write a sorry letter to the person he harmed.

theredhen Mon 23-May-11 11:15:06

Year 7, so the child is 11/12.

highhopes2010 Mon 23-May-11 11:15:34

Sorry,just noticed it was a YEAR 7!But same would apply-apart from the note-he would have to go to said persons house to apologise.

jaffacake79 Mon 23-May-11 11:16:57

I agree with apologising, but I'd also ask how he had the opportunity to do something so bad. Was there adequate supervision?

highhopes2010 Mon 23-May-11 11:18:49

If the parent also said they wouldn't discuss it anymore with their child they could just be saying that till they're out of earshot and hopefully giving them alot more grief over it then.I would.

theredhen Mon 23-May-11 13:55:29

I know for a fact that the childs parents hasn't disciplined them at all and in fact, even joked with the child about the fact that he is always in trouble. I think the parent sees it as just boys being boys. Not the first detention for this sort of thing. There have been several for misbehaving, fighting, answering teachers back etc.

Personally I would be very upset and angry with my son and would withold something that the child enjoyed whether it be computer games or seeing his friends, or his sport that he enjoys.

In fact my DS has told me that he is more worried about my reaction than that of the teacher if he misbehaves.

highhopes2010 Mon 23-May-11 14:13:37

Well then the school must know what type of a family the child comes from(eg..not bothered)and yes you would of thought maybe they would of been a bit more stern,eg...loss of breaks,detention for the week?Has the school said why if the situation was that bad they only took 1 hour detention from the child?

cory Wed 08-Jun-11 19:10:40

If it was one of mine I would expect them to be so upset that no further punishment would be needed. In another family, formal punishment might be the right thing.

But I wouldn't expect the teachers in a secondary school to know exactly what kind of family we are: they've only seen me briefly at parents evening if that: several of dd's teachers I have never met.

But surely the school cannot discuss their punishment with the parents of another child?

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