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is anyones dc now 3 and not at nursery?

(21 Posts)
ilovetochat Thu 15-Oct-09 13:59:32

Have you chosen not to send them to nursery, just start reception next year?
Are there still classes/activities that cater for their age?
Are you doing any learning or just play?

My dd is 2.3 but im considering not sending her to nursery next year, just carrying on with swimming, walks, gym etc and letting her start reception at 4.2.

just wanted to know if people are doing this this year and if they feel they have made the right decision?


LetsEscape Thu 15-Oct-09 15:05:21

Have you thought about sending her a couple of sessions a week to a playgroup instead of a more formal school nursery? it's a good half way house.

Playgroups are very much based on play and would give her some idea of structure (e.g. sitting on a carpet to hear a short story) and learn some of the social skills she will need in reception. I think it would be very hard to go from just at home to a reception class which is all day and expect children to understand a certain routine.

I also had a summer born child who started reception very young and nursery was fine - it was reception that was hard as he was still napping after lunch!

ilovetochat Thu 15-Oct-09 15:15:32

the playgroup at the surestart centre has no structure but its aimed at 2 year olds, maybe a private nursery would let dd go for a couple of sessions a week next year?

Cosette Thu 15-Oct-09 15:19:51

My DS is 3.2 and goes to a childminder, who takes him to a playgroup a couple of days a week. However I have noticed that most boys of his age do seem to go to a couple of mornings of nursery a week, and then come onto the childminder afterwards. He will be almost 5 when he starts school (September baby) so we are planning for him to do 2-3 mornings at nursery from age 4, as we think he will need it more then, and the nursery is adjacent to the school he will go to, so it should lead in nicely and allow him to make friends before starting school.

ilovetochat Thu 15-Oct-09 15:22:30

do state nurserys allow children to just do a few mornings a week or start later in the year and just do a term before reception?

Cosette Thu 15-Oct-09 15:32:08

most state nurseries (certainly the ones near me) seem to expect you to go every morning. I think with any nursery you'll find it hard to start later in the academic year, as they have people leaving in the September to go to school, so are unlikely to have places come up during the year - unless you live somewhere where children can start school in January.

You probably also need to put your name down now for a place in September - as nurseries tend to get full about now for next year. State nurseries generally have longer waiting lists too..

Private nurseries often let you do a couple of mornings a week - at the one my DS is going to all the children do between 2 and 4 mornings.

ilovetochat Thu 15-Oct-09 15:43:23

thanks, ive just checked the ofsteds of the attached schools and will view them i think.

policywonk Thu 15-Oct-09 15:48:38

Just to say, both my DSs stayed at home with me until they started reception, and both settled in to reception with no trouble at all. Neither seemed to be adversely affected by not having followed the EYFS curriculum in the pre-school year (I didn't do any formal learning with them at home as I'm a rotten teacher). DS1 had caught up with his nursery-educated peers by the end of the Christmas term, and DS2 seems on course to do the same.

If you like having your daughter at home with you and she likes it too, there's no good reason at all for sending her to nursery or playgroups IMO. (Of course, if you want to send her, or she wants to go, that's absolutely fair enough.) The socialisation that she gets in the normal course of parent-and-toddler groups, play dates, activity sessions etc will be absolutely fine.

iwantitnow Thu 15-Oct-09 19:45:20

I stayed at home (July born) and did not go to nursery and had a horrendous time starting reception and never really liked school from them on, it was a tremendous shock starting school. As a result I made sure DD started a pre-school 3 mornings a week and will do for 2 years before starting reception. I don't want her to go 5 morning so went for a private pre-school. She loves it there only 3 hour sessions and she didn't really need any settling in.

I do think there is a good reason for going to pre-school after my experiences as a child. It gets them used to a slightly more formal setting and being separated from their parents for a good block of time. Not sure it is needed for socialisation but it helps their vocab skills alot.

ilovetochat Thu 15-Oct-09 20:14:49

thanks for all your opinions, i went to nursery and cried every day and hated it, then i started reception and was fine and loved it so i think i started too young, maybe thats why im thinking about it.
But definitely if dd wants to go then i will send her and i will apply for a place for her so i have that option.

Clayhead Thu 15-Oct-09 20:17:25

Pre-Schools are based on play! (as are reception classes).

Both my dc did 3 or 4 2.5 hour pre-school sessions each term week when they were 3 and 4 years old.

At our pre-school you could do just one session a week if you wanted to or up to five full days if you paid for the extra sessions, totally up to the parents.

carriedababi Sat 17-Oct-09 15:41:32

hi lovetochat how are you?

how was your holiday?

i called the preschool i'm hopeing to send dd to yesterday to see if she caan go 4 morning a week, instead of 5.
waiting for them to get back to me

like liek dd to do 2 morning then build up to three then four

ilovetochat Sun 18-Oct-09 20:20:39

hol was excellant thanks. it is perfect with a family as we saw so much but had a great base too. the ship was amazing and dd loved it! we saw tunisia (dump), barcelona, st raphael, genoa and rome. we would love to cruise again!!
im ill now though with a chest and throat infection, yuk.
having tons of work done on the house too so in a real mess.
id like dd to do a few mornings a week and build up, is it a state preschool? let me know what they say please.

carriedababi Mon 19-Oct-09 13:08:00

where is st raphael?
oh dear you wern't ill there where you?
<sends get well thoughts>

i was really upset on sat, had a big row with dh, theres a rather embarssing thread about it in chat.
things are seeming calmer today though.

the preschool, the only one in walking distance is a private one but its registared as a charity
i'm phoning them later today to try to get an appointment to go in for a visit.
although reaally i'm just hoping dd gets in and they let her build up her hours

what did you think to puerto pollensa?

do you think you'll go on a cruise next year?

ilovetochat Wed 21-Oct-09 14:15:19

st raphael is S France between Cannes ans St Tropez, its lovley!
we'd love to cruise again but its very expensive to have a nice cabin.
we were in pollensa bay so a bit isolated but a nice area.
hope the preschool visit goes well.
what was the arguement about?

ilovetochat Wed 21-Oct-09 14:38:59

just read the arguement from weekend. hope its a bit better now.
i am lucky i guess that dp agrees with me that looking after dd is the most important job in the world and although i struggle a bit and moan i wouldnt want it any other way. id remind your dh how lucky your dd is to have you with her taking her places and playing with her.
im not looking for work either, i have no intention of working till dd is at school and if we have another i wont work till they are at school, being a sahm is a job.
hope he is treating you a bit nicer now.
when we got back off holiday me and dp argued as he was straight to the gym 2 nights on the trot like wed never been away but i go out one night a week bnow so i get me time.

carriedababi Thu 22-Oct-09 13:03:55

your so lucky, i wish my dh said that to me,
been visit a friend this am who i used to work with, hes just brought a house near me.
its really nice.
dd was a nightmare she hates men she doesn't know she was a bit cryign and clinging
until he put INTG on for her
then she calmed down

what do you think you'll do when your dcs go to school work wise?
i'd probably be happy to stay a sahm but i don;t think dh would.
what do ou do when you go out?

i think we are just in aa stressful situation with dh studying at weekends and eevenings and we have no time together, i really hope things improve when hes done his exams
be good to dod stuff together at weeekends etc

are you still thinking about trying for another next year?
we talked about it when we where away and said me mighht go for another about 50/50 chnce of going for another i'd saay
i defintley wouldn't consider it until he's finished his studies and ive sought some medical advice.

ilovetochat Thu 22-Oct-09 14:35:50

ive took dd swimming this morning and she did great, swam a width on her front and back in armbands, jumped in, blew bubbles, turned round and swam from the side to me so i hope she gets a duckling badge soon, she d love it.
when dd goes to school id like a job in the council if possible as my pension is with them and id want term time only school hours so i suppose it will have to be in a school. easier said than done i know. i wouldnt want to be at home all day when dd is at school unless i could work from home.

i go out to aquaaerobics class one night a week and dp has dd and puts her to bed and its nice having my night, having made any friends there though, everyone goes with a mate except me, loner.

we have been talking about having another baby, i always said i wanted dd to be in nursery before id consider it and she starts nursery in 11 months so the time is right in that way. i told dp my pills were running out last night and he told me to get some more sad so i dont think he is ready, dont think i am quite ready either, dd still seems so young and im scared i wouldnt love another one and wouldnt cope. but im 32 saturday and dont want a massive age gap, its such a hard decision.
also im rhesus negative and dd is positive and due to a cockup i didnt have antid injections till 2 days after her birth which worries me a lot, i might not be able to carry a baby or might have a stillborn and that would kill me inside.
what medical checks do you need?

got bathroom painted last night and all curtains are back up now but no baby gates up so im hovering over dd all the time, aaagh.

carriedababi Thu 22-Oct-09 16:00:21

yeah the age gap thing does worry me a bit too, i don't really feel ready for another yet but worry a large agegap will make it difficult for them to play together.

when dd was born i had a 4th degree tear, pph and was tachicardic
terrible pregnancy bad sickness, cramping, blood pressure problems

in fact im scared stiff in a sense to go throught that all again, byt the most serious thing is the 4th degree tear and anal sphincther repair operation.

i don't really know anything about rhesus negative sounds really scary

id come to the aqua aerorbic if it wasn;t so far away

what would you like to do in school? classroom assistant or admin? or something?

ilovetochat Thu 22-Oct-09 16:12:49

classroom assistant maybe but not sure what quals needed? some council jobs allow school hours anyway so will apply for everything when im ready.

if a rhesus negative woman has a rhesus negative baby its fine. dd should have been rhesus negative cos me and dp were tested as rhesus negative, so i didnt have the injestions as i didnt want blood products, then dd was born positive and then dp was retested as positive so i should have had the injections but i just had the one before i left hospital.
so during pregnancy (and i had a bleed and a crash) dds blood could have put antibodies in my blood which will fight off another baby causing miscarriage or stillborn.
i always tested no antibodies so im hoping the injection afterwards was sufficient but wont know till im tested again when pregnant.

what worries me is if we try when dd is 2.5 or 3 and hen it takes years to catch, then there will be a massive age gap.

carriedababi Thu 22-Oct-09 16:26:20

that sounds really worrying.

yeah i know what you mean bout if it takes ages to get pg.

it's pretty stressful workign these things out.
i have a tendency to over think at the best of times anyway.

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