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Preschool in September and still in nappies - what happens if theres no change by then?

(12 Posts)
FenellaFudge Sun 07-Jun-09 13:23:45

DS is 3.2 and showing absolutely no signs of wnating to get out of nappies.
I am trying to maintain a balance between encouraging him and not turning it into an issue for him.
I'm generally of the belief that he'll let me know when he's ready and that it's best to work with him rather than deciding the time myself and expecting him to fall in with it.
I'm now worrying about his preschhol placement for september. I assume he cant be in nappies when he goes? Or even if he can then he'd possibly be a bit of an oddity?
I dont want to postpone preschool, he's been with me since he was born and i think now is the time and he'd really get something out of it.
Anyone had any experience of this?
Is it at all feasible that a child can go from completely disinterested in toilet training to reliably in pants in th space of 3 months?

nappyaddict Sun 07-Jun-09 14:05:22

Every preschool and even school now has to accept a child in nappies in line with the DDA.

mollyroger Sun 07-Jun-09 14:11:13

it does seem to vary from estblishment to establishment. here i used to work, we had several childre still in nappies. Neither of my boys were magically ready by 3.5.
it's fairly ridiculous of places to put this kind of pressure on children and families. SN/medical conditions aside, I've never met a child who went to actual school wearing nappies, they all sort themselves out sooner or later.

Check what the 'poicy' is at the preschool your child is going to.

Littlepurpleprincess Sun 07-Jun-09 14:19:19

I'm having the same problem with DS. He will be starting pre school in september so I went in and spoke to the teacher. She was really understanding and lovely about it and reassured me that she knew they all do it in there own time.

TBH if she had said it would be a problem, I probably would have seconds thoughts about sending him to this school. They should be supportive of your child. I'm sure your pre school will be as well. Give em a ring or pop in and ask.

FenellaFudge Sun 07-Jun-09 15:19:59

We've got a parents day thingy in a couple of weeks so I will bring it up with the teacher then.
Someone told me that in some preschools the parent is called in to change the nappy if the child poos, that seems such an elaborate and restrictive set-up that i cant quite believe it.

nappyaddict Sun 07-Jun-09 16:04:41

According to the DDA they cannot leave a child in a soiled nappy whilst they ring you and wait for you to come and change it. It is seen as a form of abuse/neglect so they have to change them. Any establishment telling parents this is breeching the DDA.

ThingOne Sun 07-Jun-09 16:16:50

It could happen that quickly. My DS2 is 3 and started potty training about a month ago. He's not completely successful yet but is already managing most poos in the loo, and some days has no accidents at all. I would certainly still say we are potty training but he could be ready in a week (or indeed two months).

I think with most children you just wait until they are ready but my personal and completely unscientific opinion based mainly on my DS1 (at about your son's age, maybe a bit older) is that a few children just don't give a monkey's and need a lot of encouragement to move on. I got bored of waiting for DS1's cue and fairly sharpish after him showing absolutely no interest at all, I put him in pants and trousers all the time. It took six weeks for him to realise wet legs were a bad plan. I can't believe there are many as stubborn as this!

littlerach Sun 07-Jun-09 16:23:52

Nappy is right, as far as i am aware.

WE have just been redoing policies in line with EYFS and it would be discrimintaory to refuse a child due ot nappies.

mollyroger Sun 07-Jun-09 16:44:27

well, I had friends who swore blind their child was toilet trained at 2 or ealier. yet they seemed to spend their entire life dealing with accidents hmm
Both my boys were not ready until at least 3.5 years and yet, were totally reliably dry day and night within a fortnight of them deciding happies had to go.

emy72 Tue 23-Jun-09 16:28:04

We thought our son at 2yrs and 10 months wasn't ready at all as showing no signs, but after a couple of horrible days of continuous accidents and a lot of encouragement he totally surpised us and was dry day and night within a fortnight. Might be worth giving it a go, they can surprise you!!! x
Sorry, can't help with the nursery thing as haven't been in that position, but worth asking what their policy is....

VeraChuckandDave Tue 23-Jun-09 16:41:19

They have to accept them in nappies, and change them.

Ds1 was still in nappies at 2.8 years when he started preschool. They did say they'd call me if they tried to change his nappy and he got distressed at someone othe than me doing it, but that never happened.

Fwiw he never showed any signs of being interested or ready. I tried at times that suited me (at 2.5, 2.9 and 2.11 years, iirc). The first couple of attempts were hopeless. The third attempt he 'got it' straight away. I do think that seeing other children weeing at preschool helps hugely too.

EldonAve Tue 23-Jun-09 16:45:23

nappyaddict is right - they have to accept them in nappies

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