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DS aged 4.3 curious about Mummy's er... "bits". Help!

(47 Posts)
TheSweetLittleBunny Thu 07-Feb-08 10:07:45

He knows that he started off as an egg and he came out of Mummy's tummy.

He knows that Mummy does not have a willy.

Now he wants to know HOW he got out of Mummy's tummy (the explanation that he "popped" out no longer suffices). And if I haven't got a willy how do I wee - and what is the place where I wee out of called blush.

Bearing in mind that this is the child who has more or less sussed that Santa Clause is all made up stuff - can any of you think of a non-rude sounding name for their mummy bits please?

JodieG1 Thu 07-Feb-08 10:11:16

I'd tell him their proper names personally.

TheSweetLittleBunny Thu 07-Feb-08 10:14:53

Would you? Have you?

PandaG Thu 07-Feb-08 10:17:07

yep, use the correct terminology - well vagina anyway. but I also refer to it as front bottom or bits...in the same way DC know the correct term for willy is penis, but most people call it a willy..and there are other words for it but they don't use them as they are rude!

georgedontdothat Thu 07-Feb-08 10:18:39

I woke up the other morning to find my dds (4) head between my thighs having a good erm look at everything blush

Baddaughterinlaw Thu 07-Feb-08 10:21:03

My DS (5) seems to have decided that my bits are just that - bits. He thinks it is funny to dash into the loo to see where my wee comes from hmm and cue much yelling if he climbs on top of me in bed, (neither me or DH wear anything) and his foot or leg brush against 'mummy's fur!' That said, Daddy's willy is really funny!
So currently we are stuck with bits and boobies so will keep going like that for a while.
Am always interested in names for girls bits as none seem 'right' somehow?

seeker Thu 07-Feb-08 10:21:37

For some reason I can't bear "bits"

Mine know the proper words, and we use them sometimes, but we are inclined to say "willy" and a vague "bottom", only being more specific when it's essential (to say which part hurts for example)

I think when you're talking about where babies come from its really important to use the proper words.

TheSweetLittleBunny Thu 07-Feb-08 10:26:25

Why does vagina sound so embarassing though? Is it because we use play/slang names (well I do anyway) when talking to our DH/DP but seldom have to refer to "it" in other situations. Grown ups don't say vagina and penis really do they? And anything else sounds like swearing and too rude for a little ones ears.

Is there a willy equivalent word for vagina that doesn't sound rude?

TheSweetLittleBunny Thu 07-Feb-08 10:28:00

Does anyone think "fanny" is rude?

PandaG Thu 07-Feb-08 10:30:56

vagina only sounds embarrassing to you because you are aware of the connotations, he won't be embarrassed. I know some people use tuppence or minnie or flower (personally hate these), think at least bits is fairly obvious and front bottom self explanatory. Suppose you could use fanny, but that could be thought inappropriate, or fanjo, but again is a more adult term. I agree with seeker, is important for the correct terms to be used when discussing where babies come from, to avoid confusion.

JodieG1 Thu 07-Feb-08 10:33:08

Yes I do use the correct words although ds calls his a willy and dd says bits, they do know the correct words too. They call them what they prefer.

Baddaughterinlaw Thu 07-Feb-08 10:33:54

I do recall hearing a debate about the historical degradation of woman through the names for their bits. For woman it all comes over as funny or comical whereas mens are more proud and upstanding (forgive the pun!) I also recall but can't remeber the exactly details so would be interested to know that the word 'cunt' seen by many as the worst swear word, actually has a proud meaning. I have never found it.
History over, don't think fanny is rude but do feel odd about DS using it.

auntieem Thu 07-Feb-08 10:34:24

I don't think fanny is rude but we have front and back bottoms in our house. Of course Daddy has a willy which is hilarious to both my dds 6 & 3.5 - oh and me too grin!
My dds often ask if their front bottoms will be hairy when they get older and if they will have boobies.
My husband however finds it very dispiriting to have his nipples called boobies so has now introduced the word "nipples" into our every day vocabulary blush

Baddaughterinlaw Thu 07-Feb-08 10:38:10

I made the mistake of refering to DH's moobies, now DS does too!

TheSweetLittleBunny Thu 07-Feb-08 10:40:57

I want DS to grow up respectful of women's bodies, which is why I did not want a rude sounding term which was probably made up by men anyway.

How about tush - or tushie as I heard a little girl say the other day? That's reasonably inoffensive isn't it?

I can see your point those of you who have said to use the correct names - but because it is not something I say it seems strange saying it and I don't want to convey embarassment to him - as if our bodies are something to be ashamed of.

Baddaughterinlaw, we walk around butt naked in front of him too and he is still quite fixated with my "breasties" as he calls them (he was breast fed until age 2.5). I think it's very sweet actually.

But does you think there is an age when you should stop letting your kids see you naked. I know of someone who used to walk around starkers in front of their teenage son.

Baddaughterinlaw Thu 07-Feb-08 10:46:21

DS is obsessed with my boobies, so much so he has told everyone at school and other parents have commented! blush
I would be interested to know what people think about age and nakedness. My Mum was very let it all hang out and I can remember being uncomfortable but thats as a teenager which I think is normal, but as little ones when does it become or does it become an issue?

TheSweetLittleBunny Thu 07-Feb-08 10:48:22

There is a lot of history surrounding women's sexuality. I heard about "cunt" being the worst swear word and I do flinch when I hear it. Did you know that the word mysoginy - does not have a female equavalent? The words for female sexual parts do tend to be comical and derogatory sounding - or almost apologetic and girly (fanny, tushie) don't they?

discoverlife Thu 07-Feb-08 10:49:55

I still walk around naked in front of my children and my eldest DS is 22 (still living at home) he is a bit more self conscious and doesn't feel as relaxed about it. But men just can't be as relaxed, womens equipment is hidden away, a blokes tends to semapnore their emotions and how cold it is to all and sundry if their naked.
There are books for kiddies that young who are curious with diagrams to help you explain. Its much better to give them a truefull factual explaination now than have them picking up the usual superstitious rubbish that happens in school.

TheSweetLittleBunny Thu 07-Feb-08 10:50:28

Sorry misogyny not mysoginy

discoverlife Thu 07-Feb-08 10:51:27

semaphore suffering from fat finger syndrome today.

TheSweetLittleBunny Thu 07-Feb-08 10:54:25

I agree discoverlife - if you can have titles to the books then let me know - DS loves books.

22 gosh - I admire that level of comfortableness in your own skin and between you and your children.

discoverlife Thu 07-Feb-08 11:05:49

It started off when I was a nipper, (last century you know) and we were living in Australia, my parents were members of a nudist club so I never saw nakedness as being unusual. It was fun watching the volley ball games though.
My philosephy has always been that nakedness is in the eye of the beholder. If they want to get leary its their problem not mine. I am comfortable in my skin, when I was younger I showed it off in bikini's, now I slob in it, but it is still the same waterproof bag that surrounds the real me.

I can't remember the titles, but I did see a good selection of that type of book at the local library.

TheSweetLittleBunny Thu 07-Feb-08 11:11:51

Thanks discoverlife. I had a quick look on amazoan and I actually have an usborne book called "where to babies come from " which I censored as being too old for him last year, so he might be ready for it now.

I'm off to get the precious one from nursery now. But I would be interested to hear everyone's views, so keep posting.

georgedontdothat Thu 07-Feb-08 11:45:47

My girls call it a loo-loo

seeker Thu 07-Feb-08 12:04:49

I agree about children, particularly boys, growing up respectful of women's bodies - that's why I don't like all the little cutesy names like flower, and tuppence. But while I'm happy for dd to say vagina, I have to stop myself cringing when ds does!

Mixed up, or what!

It does say a lot about women's seuality/sexual politics that there still isn't an acceptable word - and no "jokey" ones that aren't also rude or offensive.

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