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sooo need advice on DS at nursery school

(21 Posts)
dawnyb Tue 18-Sep-07 16:13:32

jack started nursery school on monday hes 3 afternoons only so onlt been there 2 days

well collected him 2nite and the teacher isnt happy with him,

if they ask him to do something he wont apparently hes too SILLY and that i need to do something?? What do i need to do i have no idea we have told him to behave and what eva his teacher says to do he should but how do you tell a 3 yr old thta he should do this when its only eva been my or DP that tells him?

Do i take him out school for a while and try again in few months?

Teacher wasnt very helpful

nailpolish Tue 18-Sep-07 16:14:27

im sorry i dont understand your post

mishymoo Tue 18-Sep-07 16:17:05

I am aghast at the nursery for saying that to you in the first place shock and angry!

I assume it's his first time in nursery, in a completely different environment than he is used to? Surely they need to make allowances for him and give him a chance to settle in!

I would suggest to the teacher that it surprises you that they are not a bit more patient with him!

rattleskuttle Tue 18-Sep-07 16:19:06

my dd has just started nursery school too and i think it takes a while for them to settle in.
perhaps you could ask to stay for a while so you can see how he behaves there and encourage him to do what the teacher says.

dawnyb Tue 18-Sep-07 16:22:25

its just made me feel down hes never been with anyone else apart from me or DP so its all new

Jack dosent really understand what hes done wrong

mishymoo Tue 18-Sep-07 16:23:35

IMO, he hasn't done anything wrong! Please speak to nursery manager the next time he goes and ask them to be a bit more patient with him and explain he is not used to being without either you or your DP!

Surely they will understand that??

mishymoo Tue 18-Sep-07 16:26:10

Just to add, it will get easier!

When my DS started nursery a year ago, it was really hard 'cos he cried alot, etc.. but like yours he was only going mornings only. When we changed his sessions to full days so I could go back to work, he settled down a lot quicker. Even now he has his 'bad' days and can be quite clingy but he will learn to love it and will ask on a Sat if he is going to nursery!

Keep your chin up, it will get easier smile

dawnyb Tue 18-Sep-07 16:29:53

hope so

All he keeps saying to me is
"sorry mummy sorry"

and sat here since 3:30 crying

feel so sad for him

I was told that they work on incentives(sp) maybe I should do the same

mishymoo Tue 18-Sep-07 16:31:56

Oh bless him... He is going through a period of change and it is a big thing for him.

Maybe the incentive thing is a good idea, find out from nursery exactly how it works and try and keep it the same at home!

I am still angry they said what they said when it was only his 2nd day!

dawnyb Tue 18-Sep-07 16:33:25

ty for your help missy

Dp is at work till 1 so have no1 to talk to

dawnyb Tue 18-Sep-07 16:33:47

mishymoo* blush

mishymoo Tue 18-Sep-07 16:37:14

No problem - anytime smile. Please talk to your nursery though!

XcupcakemummyX Tue 18-Sep-07 16:44:01

i have given up on the bad practises in austrian kindergartens but that is another story

what exactly did he not want to do
a lot of children do not want to join in with certain activities and that was a strange way for a nursery teacher to broach the subject
I was a nursery teacer and some children find some projects a bit bewildering.

I would just ask exactly what the teacher thought silly

tons of luck
and do not be sad
just get the facts

dawnyb Wed 19-Sep-07 16:17:55

still not listerening to them today
She did say
"it comes to a point in how much more they can do"


TheodoresMummy Wed 19-Sep-07 17:34:32

Sounds like a crap nursery.


Are there any other options ?

chocolateteapot Wed 19-Sep-07 17:40:52

Nurseries can really really vary. I would go and look at another couple and see if you think there is one you would feel more comfortable him going to.

I would not be very impressed with the way they have handled him if I were you.

mishymoo Thu 20-Sep-07 09:20:00

I can't believe they are still being so unreasonable with him? It is only his first week - give the little guy a flipping chance! If this continues, I would definitely think about looking for another nursery. What area do you live in?

dawnyb Thu 20-Sep-07 11:08:56

i live in lincoln missy

tiger _ 4 _u@ - no spaces if ya want me lol

dawnyb Thu 20-Sep-07 11:09:40

mishy blush again i get ya name wrong lol

mishymoo Thu 20-Sep-07 11:42:23

LOL at name - don't worry about it?

Your 1000's of miles away from me (we're in Weston-super-Mare) - thought I could recommend a nursery for you. Is there a leapfrog nursery near where you are? My DS goes to a leapfrog (I think they are nationwide) and they are very good, the best in the area!

How big is the nursery your DS goes to? I really do feel for you!

I know I keep saying this but I am appalled at how their skills are lacking with a new child! Are you able to chat to other mums to find out how their child/children settled in and whether they had same difficulties. It may give you an insight into the nursery and the staff.

Also, have you spoken to the Manager about this?

Hanfi Sat 22-Sep-07 18:50:03

Can't believe they are giving your son a hard time after a week and what's worse is it's upsetting him from what you say. I know it's hard but you really need to be assertive with them, it is their job to try and find a way that works with him, can they give him a special helper, can they remove the pressure by not asking him to do things. I would emphasise to them how upset he is and that indicates he does want to please and maybe they'll put in a bit more effort. My daughter started nursery last week and cried every morning for a week, now she says she plays on her own because she is shy, this isn't really like her and I worry, but really don't want to overreact, so I'm going to give it another week or two then talk to teacher. If I had a teacher speaking to me as you have I'd be livid and so worried. But kids are dead resilient and if they are secure with you they can withstand most things.

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