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does my 3year old have to attend nursery and for full entitlement

(12 Posts)
mummmy2014 Sat 18-Jan-14 16:35:49

Need some advice ladies my 3yr old has been offered an afternoon place at nursery however i am very anxious about this. I have suffered bad pn depression and depression since my wee one was born and spent slot of time alone and isolated. My child has never been away from me and is rather shy with people she doesnt know. I feel perhsps she could initially attend perhaps 2-3 sessions per week until after summer then start daily sessions in prep for school the folliwing year. I feel this would benefit us both as its alot for us both to have to be seperated every day when weve always been together. I am keen for her to make friends and attend and we do attend toddler groups twice weekly so ots not i dont want her to go i just feel its yoo much too soon. Would love her to stay with me till shes 4. Does anyone have any advice please. Thanks

AntoinetteCosway Sat 18-Jan-14 16:48:04

Children don't have to go to nursery-she can just go to school when she's 5 as far as I know. She might have fun though smile

Oblomov Sat 18-Jan-14 16:52:46

Start her off. See how she goes.even though she's shy she will probably love it and she will come on leaps and bounds.
That is good for her, so as a patent you know you should.
See how you are. You may miss her, but you will have time to yourself. You must learn to enjoy this. It is a blessing.
Then, when comfortable, you can up the number of sessions.

Mouldypineapple Sat 18-Jan-14 16:58:00

It's not compulsory for her to go but like the pp says, she would probably enjoy it.
My Dd went 3 mornings when she started. She's 4 now and goes 4 mornings and currently I have no immediate plans to increase although she does ask to go more often! I like to have a free day when we don't have to rush to preschool and can do what we want or do nothing!
She starts school in September so I want to have more time with her while I can.
She is quite shy too, it has definitely increased her confidence. Maybe try it for 2 or 3 sessions a week and see how you both get on.

PenguinsDontEatKale Sat 18-Jan-14 17:01:49

No she doesn't have to go. And you can use as little or as much of the 15 hours as you want.

Bear in mind that some places will only let you add extra sessions in a September though. Children only leave in a July (unless they move or whatever) so allowing someone to do, say, one day until Easter and then two for the summer term means keeping a day slot open and losing the income on it for a term.

It might be good for both of you to do, say 6 hours this year and then 12 from September?

mummmy2014 Sat 18-Jan-14 17:02:00

Thank you its so hard to know whats for the best. Is it possivle to request that they only attend 2-3 sessions per week? I wasnt sure if you have to attend all five.

addictedtosugar Sat 18-Jan-14 17:04:26

We committed to all 15 hours, but told them we would probably only use 12 of them in any one week. Not a problem.
They did pull a face when i asked if I could split the hours between 2 care providers tho.

defineme Sat 18-Jan-14 17:05:08

Ds1 went to all of his because I needed him to. With my twins I was a sahm and having a fab time with them. I saw no point in trekking to preschool everyday just to get them used to it. They went 2 mornings a week at first, 3 in the last 2 terms and then I finished them 2 weeks early so we could have some time together.

PenguinsDontEatKale Sat 18-Jan-14 17:06:34

Absolutely! Our pre school says a minimum of two per week. That is for the children to settle and also because there are lots of observations and paperwork per child and we can't afford the overtime for our staff to do if for lots of extra children (same amount of paperwork for a child doing two days as five, so lots of children doing one day would bankrupt us.sad )

PenguinsDontEatKale Sat 18-Jan-14 17:08:14

Oh, they aren't allowed to, but some oversubscribed areas get away with saying 15 hours or nothing. Bits of London are bad for this.

mummmy2014 Sat 18-Jan-14 17:08:43

Thank you so much for the advice ladies i dont feel so bad now glad that you are not been judgemental like some ppl i have encountered. I def like the idea of 6 hours this term and 12 nxt year thank you will discuss with nursery and let you all know how i get on. Thanks again. So nice to have someone to talk to.

PenguinsDontEatKale Sat 18-Jan-14 17:41:37

Glad it was helpful.

We had DD1 in for four days (so 12 hours) in her pre-school year and it was really nice. 3 hours flies by, and you still have the afternoon together. Plus a day a week with no commitments is good for day trips, etc. Also, enjoy the fact that it's not school. She doens't have to be there. If you want to text in the morning and say "it's a beautiful day so X won't be in today as we're off to the seaside/park/wherever" you are totally entitled to do so. Polite to let them know, but other than that it's totally up to you smile

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